Spiritually, I am beginning to understand the Boomers.
I went to see Twisters with my eldest child this week and while it was a delight and Glen Powell was created in a Movie Star Factory, I had to respectfully admonish the unsupervised young adults on both sides of me during the film.
To the left of me, we had a cute gaggle of girls, probably about my daughter’s age. Look, I’m not a monster. The battle to put the phones away has been lost. We will never sit in a darkened theater again. I understand the kids are going to chatter a little during a movie; we’re not at Cannes here. But they seriously would not stop talking. And not even trying to whisper. Daisy Edgar-Jones is trying to calculate the cloud shear with some dandelions, show some respect. After the third “I-don’t-want-to-have-to-ask-you-to-stop-talking-but-I-will” pointed look, one decided to stare back at me. As if to say, what? Well, let me tell you what, sweetheart. I never come to the movies because I don’t have a life. I paid $79.56 for bacon fries and a large Pibb Zero (not even Dr. Pepper) to look at Glen Powell in Wranglers for two hours and two minutes, so I don’t want to listen to you pick apart Sarah Beth’s ex-boyfriend’s new girlfriend’s Instagram account. Actually, I would be interested in that, but not at this time. So I just sweetly said, “I need y’all to be quiet. I’m trying to watch the movie I paid $80 for. Thank you.” I got an eyeroll but I also got silence. I don’t mind an eyeroll. An eyeroll makes me feel like I’m a wise elder of the community. I wear it with pride.
The young couple on the left, I felt for them. It’s clear they were here at the movies in order to touch one another; perhaps something not available to them by the light of day. Fine. Touch away. I once used Mr. Holland’s Opus to do the same. But just be quiet about it. Finally, I leaned forward and caught the eye of the young man, who had just slipped his hand under the blanket of his date, all while yapping about nothing. I widened my eyes, pointedly indicated that I would absolutely blow up his spot if he didn’t shut up, and leaned back in my seat. Everybody won.
This, plus getting riled up about pickleballers encroaching on my tennis time (if you aren’t following me on Instagram, I’m in a one-sided feud), I feel spiritually connected to the cultural understanding of the Boomer generation. I don’t even mean that disparagingly, because I know a lot of lovely Boomers who don’t rage about anything at all. Or maybe Millenials are ready to assume the mantle (Gen-X what say you? I hear you’re getting frosty with Gen Z on TikTok, best of luck to you). But like, I get it now. I get the “these young people today” vibes of it all. I also get the “these young people today” vibes that are “oh, they’ve really got this figured out better than we ever did, but I still wish they wouldn’t talk during the movies. I promise your mom didn’t pay $63 for a movie ticket, popcorn, and Pibb Zero just so you could scroll TikTok and have your thigh touched. Plus, I think we all have that THING we’re Boomer-y about. And obviously, I need to know yours. Maybe it’s putting grocery carts back in the corral or why we have to pay for everything with our phones. Could be anything, but please share, along with your treasures (obviously), your Boomer cause with the class today.
How bout those treasures!
🎧 I love watching my teenage daughter (and who are we kidding, also me) sell out for Taylor Swift, but meanwhile this was my absolutely jam at 13.
💚 In an exciting turn of events, it looks like it’s gonna be a Brat Summer with Madam Vice President. Look I don’t care where you land on the political spectrum, Jake Tapper aspiring “to be brat” will end up in someone’s journalism doctoral thesis and I for one can’t wait to read it.
🍹 This cutie is all of us when getting ready to go smash some Mexican food. And do do you know what goes perfectly with margaritas? My new book, of course!
🙏 We’ve all heard (and given) our share of lousy apologies. If you need some tools for how to hold your boundaries when given a bad apology, let this post be your guide.
💔 Sonya Massey was unjustly murdered in her kitchen a few days ago. I am having trouble trying to put words to the collective grief we all feel about this, but you should definitely read what David Gate and Brittany Packnet Cunningham have to say about it.
📕 I’ve been following Bethny Ricks for a while now, and SWIFTLY smashed that pre-order button when I heard about her upcoming book, Face Forward: Reclaiming Hope When Everything Falls Apart. The book is out October 1st!
⛳ Take these thoughts on Jesus after the Republican National Convention from
and tuck them away in your heart for later. So good.💨 My feelings when I’m invited to a social hang and someone says "oh, just bring your kids!" When she said, “can I have one second without 5-0 on my back?” I felt that.
🚨 Excuse me, have you heard THIS BEAUTIFUL NEWS that Manny Jacinto is going to be on Freaky Friday 2? Excuse me while I pass out watching him play Lindsay Lohan’s love interest.
🇺🇲 It’s Olympics-o-clock and people are going to swim for sport in the (less) poopy Seine! Currently, my Olympic Athlete Obsession is Ilona Maher, Team USA Women’s Rugby player and content dream machine. From reminding all the big shoulder sweeties out there to bare ‘em proudly to keeping us updated on her honey hunt in the Olympic “Villa” - she’s a total delight. If you’re focused on a particular athlete, let me know!
🏅 Speaking of The Olympics, we did a deep dive on the history of the games (among other things) on the newest episode of Faith Adjacent. If you can’t get enough of the Olympics, you can listen to the episode here!
Are you ready for the memes?
We have reached the end of the glorious treasures once again, my friends. Please share yours in the comments so we can keep the party going! See you next time!
Also obsessed with Ilona. I love her so much and have never been more invested in Rugby.
I am becoming more boomer-like by the day. I’m also a middle school teacher so I pull out the teacher look quite a bit in public. It’s hard to turn it off!