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Seriously considering making a big life change and thinking about moving from St. Petersburg, FL to Chicago. I've reinforced my decision with my boss and waiting for him to at least commit to letting me WFH for 6 months (thru June) before I take the leap. My condo I was building completely blew up- I got rid of most of my furniture when I sold my house last year. I'm going month to month in my current place and I've been WFH for 32 weeks now so WHY not?

I've always loved Chicago-- the complete opposite of where I live now and I am in desperate need of a change. I've been with my company for 10 years in January, and I'm even open to leaving the company and finding a new job, especially if they don't agree to the 6 mths. #WishMeLuck

🏈FNL: Finished S2 and started S3. Is it just me or do the Season finales seem anti-climatic? They just end- we didn't even get a championship game? Now we meet JD and Tami is the principal? Would've liked more insight into that decision! My heart is broken for Smash and this is peak Coach with how he refuses to let any of these kids give up. Billy & Mindy is the epitome of small town staying power and the evolution of Tyra's hair continues with what appears to be a perm.

📚 Finished Home Before Dark by Riley Sager and it was perfectly spooky, haunted house vibes for October. I also just finished Rules of Magic by Alice Hoffman (prequel to Practical Magic)- took a bit to get going, but it was so good!

🥗 My pants don't fit anymore: Need to get back on the WW bandwagon. It's the only thing that has worked for me. Just can't eat what I want, when I want anymore. My metabolism just can't keep up these days.

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PLEASE MOVE HERE! I've lived here for 6 years and I absolutely love it. I have a spare bedroom if you want a free place to stay to come look for an apartment.

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Yay!!! Are we friends on IG? I have tons of questions as I make some decisions and would greatly appreciate your expert input. 🥳😍 I’m barnold165.

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Ummmm... thank you for this. I am not on Twitter. Well,

I was at some point but couldn’t tell you the password. I appreciate getting to come here and pillage all of the good and never have to see the bad 💕

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I'm not sure what the protocol is about posting twice but I just remembered a few treasures:

*I'm working with youth at my internship right now which means I'm on a Zoom call with 25 teenagers every Friday night which is so much overstimulation. The silver lining is the virtual prayer wall that has been provided for them and the sheer vulnerability and honesty that is on display.

*Also I purchased our very own Amanda Water's book, You Again and it is a delight. I love a book that is told in two separate time periods but about the same people. Thanks Amanda for this lovely distraction from the dumpster fire of election, pandemic and (gestures wildly) all of this!

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This from the GBBO piece is gold:

Evidently when a ray of heavenly light shone down and the first British person saw the first cookie, the British person said, “Spiffing—but let’s make it a hard, dry pellet, really give our teeth a good workout, what?”

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Like a ginger snap I get... but a chewy, soft cookie... it just doesn’t get better

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Right? Team Soft Cookie!

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Treasures this week: the Comfortable Together group, and Mr. Rogers Faith Adjacent. Oh, and the most recent regular and Patreon episodes of the Big Boo Cast. They regularly make me lol, sometimes to the point of tears. Looking forward to a weekend of absolutely nothing. Happy Friday!

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The waterfall of emotions that comes wrapped up in this sweet newsletter gets me every time. I'm sitting in my office crying 20 minutes before I have to coach a teacher. Totes ok because I really needed the cry, been holding in tension all week.

Amongst all the posts that pulled at my heart strings, I am especially thankful for the girl pronouncing English words because I'm an ESL Specialist and that was super great.

Love to see it!

My treasure this week is that I've saved up a bunch of Bible Binge eps so I can hang out with Erin, Jamie, and Knox while I have an alone day tomorrow. (Praise Jesus for alone days).

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Y’all. My week has been mostly turds:

We didn’t get a rental we applied for (housing where we are is so competitive).

My husband lost his job. Thanks covid.

My 4 year old has been just testing my salvation.

My husband also has been in and out of the hospital with mysterious abdominal pain. Turns out it’s an ulcer. From stress. Thanks covid.

BUT... it’s snowing here in Montana... everything is being covered in a thick blanket of white. I keep being reminded every time I look out the window that God is in the business of making all things new. Over and over. Without fail. God is always faithful.

So, I guess there is a treasure in there somewhere.

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*Internet hugs*

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Hugs. That's a lot. I'm glad the snow brought some comfort.

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Allie, I’m sorry for an overwhelming turd week - praying for comfort

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Oct 23, 2020Liked by Erin H Moon

Y’all, I have got to be better about digging up treasures. It’s the main reason I don’t post here every week; I feel like I never have anything good to bring to the table.

My husband and I finished the second season of The Umbrella Academy this week. We watched both seasons in the past few weeks and it is a wild ride at times but really good! So...one treasure found!

Also, because it’s fall, I’ve been listening to Nickel Creek - my fav band of all time. My music listening has been weird for years (which is a whole thing and really sad for me) but going back and listening to these albums I love has been super fun. And introducing them to my 8-year-old.

I found 2 treasures! That might even count as a third. 🤣

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It took me along time to realize that it's ok to just like the music you like and not have to constantly be discovering new artists or keeping up with who's hot. I can still be a music lover and like listening to tried and true favorites. Sorry, all that soapbox to say: yay for comfort music! 😊

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Ooooh! That is a good thing to learn and remember!

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Umbrella Academy is the best!

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Nickel Creek is THE BEST!

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I love Nickel Creek! I introduced The Boy to them on our road trip last weekend and was delighted to make him a fan. Such good fall music.

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Yes!!!! Nickel Creek & Patty Griffin are my favorites of all time!!!

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Patty Griffin and the fall leaves 🍁 perfection

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Oct 23, 2020Liked by Erin H Moon

Rebeckajust now

I was in a good mood today and happy that I only had one small turd and then I got a phone call informing me that my nephew (who's birthday is today) has COVID and I broke down crying. He's ok-ish and on the mend but I guess I have a lot more fear/stress/sadness in me than I thought and it doesn't take a lot for the dam to burst...

My treasures:

*The Comfortable Words, I've loved doing it together with so many kind, thoughtful, lovely people. I wished I could have participated more in the comments but bronchitis had other plans. (Coughing makes my brain go blank, apparently.)

*My dear friend, who has struggled with infertility and everything that comes with it, sent me a picture of her ultrasound. Baby is growing and seems healthy and I could not be happier for her! ❤

*I finally hung a couple of lanterns I got at Easter. Better late than never. 😉

*Kids are the best. 😂 https://www.huffpost.com/entry/funny-tweets-kid-quotes_l_5ca26711e4b0fb341d60cab2

*This article. https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-sussex-54607295

*This adorable video. 😍 https://twitter.com/dog_rates/status/1316053805742530560

* I want to be this man when I grow up! https://www.instagram.com/p/CGX4mPJhxfa/

That's it for me. Take care, friends!

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I'm sorry about your nephew! I'll be praying for a good recovery for him!

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Thank you, Hannah! ❤

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I'm so sorry about your nephew! I hope he keeps feeling better.

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Thank you! ❤

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Praying for your nephew, friend! And your TREASURES. Heavy on pups, cutie kids, and hope for us all!

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Thank you! ❤ Glad you enjoyed the treasures!

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Oh, Rebecka! I am so sorry to hear your nephew has COVID. That is awful. So glad he is doing better, but still - it's scary when it hits that close to home. ❤️

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Thank you! ❤

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Oct 23, 2020Liked by Erin H Moon

Hi, friends! I have commented sporadically here before, but not frequently. However, I loved the community that we cultivated over at The Comfortable Words so much that I decided to try to poke my head in here on a more regular basis. :)

My Treasures for the Week

-My awesome pen pal, who I connected with courtesy of Erin Moon. Her letters are so dear to me, and I love that we have become such good friends.

-The Comfortable Words. I so enjoyed reading this with several of you all!

-It was 80 degrees yesterday here in Southwest Ohio, and it made my summer-loving soul so happy.

My Turds for the Week

-My husband lost his job around a month ago. Many people in my life have decided to text me any time that they see a now hiring sign in a window. My mother texted me four times last week to tell me that Amazon is hiring. She asked me the other day if he had considered getting a job at the local outlet mall. A man from church texted me this morning to also tell me that Amazon is hiring. I know they are doing it because they care. But it's starting to wear on me. Its not exactly helpful, and plus, my husband is a mechanical engineer.....he'll work anywhere if we get desperate enough, but he's really looking for a job in his field.

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I am so sorry about your husband’s job and the unhelpful Job’s friends making new job successions. Praying for quick resolution!

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Ugh, that's so overwhelming---so many suggestions would make my head explode, too. And it's so hard because you know they are trying to be nice! But really you just need someone to sit with you in the difficult place right now. We are there with you. I'm so glad you shared.

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My husband also just lost his job (like 3 days ago actually) and we have already received the influx of “such-and-such are hiring” from my mom mainly and I know it’s meant to be encouraging but damn it... it just bothers me.

Praying your husband find the perfect job in his field!

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Oh no! I'm so sorry to hear that, Allie! I'll be praying for you and your husband--that he'll find the right job, too!

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We went through unexpectedly losing my husband's job in the early part of 2020 and it is rough. I hear you on the unhelpful ways that people are always trying to help.

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I kept a list of treasures this week, is this what adulting is?

* I finally voted! It's been hanging over my head because I was putting A LOT of weight on this election which is good but also bad for my perfectionist tendencies. But I did it!

* I finished my weekly paper for my grad school course while the sun was still up the night before it was due! I haven't been time managing very well and stared into the blue light of my computer until well past 9 pm the past few weeks.

* My sister and I created a proper tea party for my 5-year-old niece complete with scones, fancy china, and Devonshire cream. She kept saying, "This is amazing." Also, she is a huge fan of milk in her tea, come to find out.

* It's Pastor Appreciation month and the whole congregation of the church that I intern at has been so lovely and generous. I've gotten three gift cards and several very sweet notes.

* I bought a new hand mixer with one of those gift cards and this is also what adulting is.

* I discovered @KoreanVegan on Tik Tok and she is the most soothing and thoughtful thing I've seen on there in a long time.

https://www.tiktok.com/@thekoreanvegan

Only a few turds:

* A church that sponsors me informed me that they are considering relinquishing their monthly financial support until I am actually on field as a missionary in Ireland which who knows when that will happen because of COVID. The pastor that informed me of it, told me on Facebook Messanger at 10 pm one night which was dumb but he acknowledged that stupidity and sent me a proper email in the morning. So I had a lot of feelings about that but mostly about how he told me and less about losing the support. I used to take this kind of thing VERY personally but I am working the coping techniques that are to remind myself that it's not personal. They didn't have the whole story and it's all in God's hands. He has provided for me so far and will continue to do so.

*The grad class I'm in is frustrating because the professor isn't actually teaching us from his brain. He's directing us to read and write papers, with little to no feedback from him. This can be the nature of online classes but I haven't had such a disengaged professor before. It's frustrating especially since it's a theology class that really needs some active teaching and discussion.

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Molly, will you send me proper tea trappings?! And I am so sorry about the support news and lack of feedback in class. Praying for God’s provision in both

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In our opinion (my sister and I) scones, tea sandwiches and cookies are a must at all tea parties. If you have scones you have to have good butter and Devonshire cream. You can hack this recipe with cream cheese, powdered sugar, and heavy cream. I have a scone recipe that provides lots of variations of flavorings and it's been a big hit all throughout quarantine.

https://thestayathomechef.com/british-scones/#jump-to-recipe

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Sure, I wish I could post photos of it here.

Send me your email, and I'll send you what I've learned throughout the years having a mom that loved high tea and dozens of trips to Ireland

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Mad props for finishing your paper when there's still daylight. I once pulled an all-nighter writing TWO 10-15 pagers for two different classes, neither of which I had even thought about until that night. Do not recommend. 😆

Also, I had a professor once who gave us a very vague syllabus for the first two weeks of class and said he would get the rest to us later. He never got the rest to us later and still expected us to know what assignments to turn in and when. He wouldn't even tell us what our exams would be covering. It could have been such a good class (Psych. & Christianity), but it ended up being the only C(-) I ever got. None of us left positive evaluations for that professor at the end of the semester. 😐 All to say, I feel your frustration with disengaged professors. Ugh.

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My conflict-avoidant enneagram 2 heart feels so much anxiety about leaving him a bad review but I think I might. It's also a very small denominational college, so this professor is also on the board of my sending agency and a financial supporter of mine!

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If our reviews weren't anonymous, I definitely wouldn't have left a negative review, but thankfully they were. But he was also a new professor that year (old, but new to our university), so they needed to know!

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I'm pretty sure they're anonymous so at least there's that

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My week can be summed up in this tweet: https://twitter.com/daciaonthedaily/status/1317289306034262016?s=21

Sciata is the worrrrst. Moving on to a couple of my favorite treasures (I know have a note in my notes app dedicated to collecting links all week long):

+ we've probably all seen this adorable couple re-uniting after 215 days, but if you haven't: https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJaAbKXg/

+ this mash-up slaps so hard and had me dancing: https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJaG4CV4/

+ Grandpa Holt is the cutest thing on the Internet: https://www.instagram.com/reel/CGjE2QVpkIe/?igshid=138nn6doahtan

(Just realizing 2 of my 3 treasures are of the geriatric persuasion, but I'm cool with it.)

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Love all of these! Bopping to that mashup the rest of mh days

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Well, I had not seen that reunion and now I'm crying!

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Well, thanks for making me cry at work with that Nicholas Winton video.

Updates/things I'm loving:

-The Boy and I got to take a mini road trip last weekend to visit his grandparents (first time meeting them for me). We cooked together for his family and I won them over with said cooking. We got to soak in the hot tub at night and first thing in the morning (just...can that be my life every day?). But we also drove through the wreckage of one of the many wildfires that destroyed homes and towns here in Oregon and it was so, so sad seeing only chimneys and burnt cars remain for miles and miles. 😔

-It's cold outside (my car was even frosted over yesterday morning!), which means I can wear all the warm chunky sweaters that make me feel like I'm under a blanket at work. Also means cuddling doesn't immediately lead to sticky sweat, so that's nice.

-These ridiculously and dangerously easy GF peanut butter cookies: https://www.texanerin.com/gluten-free-peanut-butter-cookies/

-My sister will be delivering her second baby in the next couple weeks (due on Halloween, and if he's born on that day I think our mother will have a heart attack and be forever concerned for his soul.) I'm so, so excited to have a fresh baby to snuggle, but I also might have to be secretive about meeting him because our parents are not being smart about COVID stuff and my sister isn't sure how she feels about them being around him when they're not being safe (understandably so) but we also don't want them to be mad that she's letting me meet him and create some weird drama (can you tell we're both 9s? 😆).

-I have started rewatching Gilmore Girls because that is where I'm at in life and I'm starved for content and needed something to fill the Schitt's Creek hole in my life.

-The Boy has an interview today at the company where my dad works. He and all the other upper management are nearing retirement age and are looking to hire younger people to train and replace them. This would be a good job for Michael, and it would mean he would move up closer to my neck of the woods, but also he might be working with my dad? Not sure how I feel about that. 🙃

Anyway, that's a lot. I'll stop and start reading through all these other treasures. Yay for Fridays!

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Sending amazing vibes for Michael and interviewing and your new nephew on the way! I love a GG rewatch and will sometimes make my friends pick a number 1-7 and 1-22 to watch an episode. One friend will name random episodes to watch 😂 enjoy your sweater weather!

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re-watching the Gilmore girls as 35yo woman is a totally different experience for me. I try to regain that warm fuzzy feeling from watching the first time around but half the time I’m just like.. y’all need some therapy and some boundaries.

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Oh yes, it is very different watching as an adult! Good for the nostalgia, but always with a tinge of, "uh, ya'll need some help." 😂

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The phrase "fresh baby to snuggle" made me feel happy. I don't want to have children myself, but MAN...I love having a fresh baby to snuggle. I hope it's everything you're hoping it will be (without any of the conflict you're anticipating). :)

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I bookmarked that recipe real quick! I've never really liked peanut butter but the last couple of months I've been craving it like crazy. Weird.

A new niece or nephew, how exciting!

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They're so good! I made them once and The Boy ate them all in two hours. I tripled the recipe for our road trip (over 30 cookies). They were all gone by the end of the weekend. I ate three. 😂

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Oh wow! 😂

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As somebody who had a newborn catch RSV from relatives during a non-pandemic, please tell your sister to stand strong! My son was fine after four days in the hospital, but the resulting post-partum anxiety was rough and long lasting. I hope you can sneak in to see him safely!

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Yes! It's already making Thanksgiving plans difficult too because my parents usually invite a load of friends over who don't have family around (which is usually great, but they're still wanting to do the same this year), so she doesn't want to bring the new baby if that's the case, AND my dad will be traveling just the week before. So she agreed to come if we push our Thanksgiving to the Sunday after when my dad will be at his 14 day mark post-traveling, but only if it's just our family, and they are not happy about that. I'm hoping that once they realize she's firm about it all and it means they won't be able to meet their grandson, they'll start behaving. 🙄

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The Halloween birthday comment made me laugh out loud! I hope you can secretively meet your nephew without issue (speaking as a fellow 9)

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Hi, Lil Swipes!

Turd:

- Update on our Moony pup situation: we did end up sending her back to her breeder last Friday night. We just don't have the ability to go through maybe losing another puppy again and they have many more contacts and resources to attempt to help her. They already have a contact that is getting them an appointment with a specialist at University of TN. So hopefully they can get her some help and it's beneficial. It was awful saying goodbye, though, and we've all been emotional this week as a result.

- My ulcer is acting up. It's probably stress, but trying not to stress right now feels impossible.

Treasures:

- A couple days after that, the breeders contacted us. They had held back one puppy, a male, for their breeding program. But with Moony's special needs, they don't have the time to devote to him. So, assuming he passes a second health check with a different vet (they are not pleased that their regular vet missed Moony's problems), we will be picking him up tonight. My husband and I are cautiously optimistic, but we are NOT telling the kids until we physically have him.

- Erin, knowing how to hack my crying (and naming it as doing that, instead of assuming I'm a weirdo for doing random things when I'm upset) has been very beneficial. The end of the last Harry Potter book, clips from the Lost finale (the touches!) and It's a Wonderful Life for the win. I used to do this when I was a kid with a book on tape of Anne of the Island that was narrated by Megan Follows, and I am forever sad that I lost it even though I don't have a tape player anymore. I can still hear her doing Ruby Gillis's monologue about wanting to live.

- My daughter is turning seven on Sunday! She is a ray of sunshine and when she is not, I have found Jen Hatmaker's hack about adding water to be a winner. And she can now shower without the least bit of help and it's as amazing as I thought it would be.

Nervous about an upcoming trip out-of-state to my grandparents' house this coming Thursday. My mom is there until she goes back overseas so it is our only chance to see her this year, but the possibility of us taking Covid-19 to my grandparents who are in their late eighties is daunting. Also daunting: visiting right before the election. Our extended family has a new agreement not to discuss politics, but what counts as not political now? I am a five and small-talk is not my forte. Suggestions welcome!

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I am so sorry about Moony, but so glad for you it worked out the way that it did 💕💕 happy birthday to your sweet girl and praying for preparations!

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There are so many things in here that made me go "YES--AGREE"---the end of the final Harry Potter book, It's a Wonderful Life, Anne of the Island IS MY FAVORITE, that Ruby Gillis monologue. I am an Enneagram 4, so I don't need to hack my crying (lol) but I will cry right along with you on all.these.things. :)

My husband is a 5, and a way he has found to avoid small talk is to ask a lot of questions that allow others to talk about themselves. He's found that most people are fine talking about themselves if you have a healthy list of questions to throw at them. Maybe coming up with a list of non-political questions? Or since you will be with your grandparents, can you come up with stuff you want to know about them and their past that could fill the time together? Best of luck on this---I hope you can enjoy your family time free of politics! :)

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I forgot the other thing I wanted to ramble here about. So two posts - sorry!

The Faith Adjacent Mr Rogers episode. Months ago I submerged myself in a close study of Mr Rogers the documentary and the Tom Hanks movie. I came away with questions. And one of those questions Erin gave a great answer to in this podcast. Is it silly that I was excited to hear my question read? Anyway...with that answer in mind, I had two encounters this week that continued to challenge me in how to handle these deep rifts caused by politics.

First up was a conversation with my mom where she shared about having a conversation with some people in her small group that seemed to boil down to their dismissal of "all democrats as deceived." I was encouraged to hear how my mom is trying to listen to her neighbors and challenge some of these characterizations of whole groups of people. But it left me a little ill at ease. I think our current situation allows us to be further and further from encountering real people we know and love who may hold views that challenge ours.

The second was a conversation I was having with my sister about the Phil Vischer video about abortion. It turned into what felt like a debate about racial issues and I was left feeling discouraged that so long as the internet offers us a view to support whatever reality we choose to believe we will remain entrenched in our views and only look for proof that backs them up.

Lastly my other sister and I have been talking at length about a chapter in Kelly Corrigan's book 'Tell Me More' titled "I Love You." In it, she talks about how powerful "I love you" becomes when it shows up in these tensions or places where we are struggling to find common ground. I've been thinking a lot about how I would write some of these - one to my teenage son, another to my family members who I can't seem to find any common ground around politics. Something like "Even though we can't agree on what feel like indisputable facts to me and you keep sending me lengthy videos to watch that allow you to further insulate your opinions, even though I struggle to hang on to the belief that these differences will not surmount the common ties that bind us, I love you."

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Have you listened to the podcast about Mr. Rogers? It's called "Finding Fred" and it's GREAT. I really enjoyed listening to it, and I think I'd listen again because there's so much good stuff in there.

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That Beth Moore tweet!!! lol for real over my bagged grocery store salad and lukewarm Diet Coke lunch break

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Turd: I have, I guess, a man cold. Worst cold of my life, possibly -- the body aches broke me and I ordered some woo-tastic lozenges from Target drive-up.

Treasure: I was tested and it's not covid. My husband has been bringing me tea and congee while I lie on the sofa and read.

I read Ian McEwan's "Sweet Tooth" and it was ... awful?? This man won a Booker Prize??? Now I'm reading Vivian Vande Velde's "Heir Apparent," which is a ton of fun. I also have the rest of the Twilight books coming in the mail, since I missed that boat in high school when I was so pleased with myself for not being "basic."

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I read the Twilight books as an adult, while we were going through a rough time in our early marriage. They aren't high art, but they were so dramatic and engrossing! Probably the perfect type of thing to read during 2020.

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I read all the Twilight books as a grown woman while I languished on the couch with mono. They are delightfully dramatic, and being sick is a super time to dive in. Enjoy!

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Another treasure, a BIG one: a stranger came into our yard with a clip board and I thought we were about to get cited for the length of our grass, but he's here to plant the free trees from the county tree adoption program!!!!!!!!!

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I work in a library and just processed the new Twilight book. I definitely didn't miss the boat, but that's just because I'm incapable of not reading anything people are talking about. Enjoy the journey!

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A man cold 😂😂 Laughing so hard at the description, but sorry that you’re feeling terrible. I hope it passes quickly!

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Thank you! It is passing pretty well, thank goodness.

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A while back there was talk of making Olympics events out of everyday things. Or something. IYKYK. Anyway, I'm feeling really close to Olympic leveling at avoiding grocery shopping and/or meal planning. I hates it. I still think about that part in Becoming by Michelle Obama when she talked about how she decided to reclaim her time by hiring a personal chef. And as much as I LOVE MO, this upsets me to this day.

But I did not come here to write about that. I came here to write about how this week was but sometimes I want to ramble.

I listened to the Burnout episode on Brene's podcast (thanks to recommendation here) and the Mister Rogers episode on Faith Adjacent. I felt super accomplished because I rarely have the attention span to get through two podcast episodes these days. The Burnout stuff was mind blowing for me. My therapist asks me on the regular about where I "feel" things in my body and I just nod and smile at her like she's making sense. Body scan meditations are a mystery to me. The Burnout revelations finally brought all that stuff together and it started to make sense to me. Question for any of you who have studied this further than me: I want to know more about the part where they talked about creative outlets and even mentioned using your imagination. So I tend to be someone who lets my imagination run WILD when I'm stressed. I don't know if this is exactly what they meant and am hoping when I read the book I may understand better.

My other thought about my week centers around a theme of "finishing strong" and whether or not I will ever be a person who does. Did anyone see the NYT chocolate chip cookie recipe claiming to be the best chocolate chip cookie recipe? On the one hand, will I never not fall for those. And on the other, why must people insist on boldly claiming these crowns for themselves? I intend to try the recipe and then question my own failings and the NYT's once I've confirmed that it is in fact NOT the best. The main difference I see in the recipe is superfine sugar. Otherwise, pretty much the same as any other recipe I've made in my life. If you have made it this far on this rambling journey with me, *turns and looks you in the eye*, thank you for listening.

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Cookie comments are finishing strong 🙌🏻Ooo buddy, do I have opinions on this “best chocolate chip cookie” business. The best chocolate chip cookie recipe is the one that makes the type of cookies you like. All chocolate chip cookies are not made equally but all types are valuable. I prefer thick with crispy edges and baked but soft centers, somewhere between a Great American mall cookie and the corner bakery monster cookie. In fact I trial-and-errored through the first two months of Covid to perfect my personal best cookie. But that’s not everybody’s ideal cookie. NYT’s recipe does not meet my standards. So you are not a failed baker. It’s a failed system of “bests”. May you find the best cookie for you and your kitchen!

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I spent the first two months of Covid trying to perfect a homemade donut. I feel you on this cookie endeavor. (And I haven't yet succeeded...but winter will quarantine me soon and I can try again...)

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Ooh that’s a great endeavor!! I haven’t tried making donuts but I should try!

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That's the kind I like- would love for you to share you're personal best!

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Yes! I use this recipe https://www.handletheheat.com/bakery-style-chocolate-chip-cookies/ and don’t worry about eggs being room temperature because I forgot once and they turned out fine 😂. After you chill them for 24 hours, you can either bake them immediately and I bake at 355-360 to get a crisper outside edge with soft middle, or you can ball them up (with lots of mini m&ms if you so fancy, and I do haha) and freeze them. Then set out one (or however many you want) bake them at 360 until the edges are golden brown but the centers aren’t quite done (check at around 15 minutes). Let them cool and the middles will set. Definitely use a kitchen scale and not measuring cups, feel free to be a little generous on the sea salt, and use regular size chocolate chips. On the oven temps, I’m not actually sure how accurate my oven is so test out a dough ball at a time to figure out what hits the spot for you!

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Such an important point. How could we ever come to a consensus on THE BEST when we have such varying preferences?! And this is where I see my failure. In falling for people out here trying to claim they have achieved the impossible.

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I do find when I'm stressed, I'm excellent about letting my imagination spin down very unhelpful paths - have had to do a lot of practice of acknowledging that it could happen but it is also not worth my energy imagining each detail. :|

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Ugh, yes, I do this. I read a quote once that said “Worry is a misuse of imagination,” and that’s definitely apt for me. I try to occupy my imagination some other way, but it’s a struggle!

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I'm exactly like this except with things that are very very very unlikely ... what if my husband randomly dies in the night? What if there's a civil war and troops are illegally quartered in my house?

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I could have written this post myself. Between my anxiety and being an ennegram 6 - I can't keep myself from following those threads. If my husband doesn't answer his phone/respond for a while, I've already decided he's dead. It's a whole thing.

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SAME Monica. But it got me wondering this week, maybe these absurd flights of fancy are helping me???

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I think it can be helpful to allow your brain to think the thoughts, but then to reframe the thoughts. It's a little bit like when you deny yourself sugar or snacks or whatever and you go BONKERS the next time you see a cookie and eat 17 instead of just one. If you just allow yourself to have a cookie---but while you have that cookie, spend time being mindful of how the cookie is making you feel, how it tastes, what the texture is, etc.---those cravings (which are the equivalent of the bad path thoughts) will lessen. I think so much of it is about mindfulness. I struggle with this, too. It's not easy.

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This is almost exactly the strategy my therapist recommended. Trying to repress certain thinking may only result in exacerbating it. It seemed like the meditation practicing of noticing it, reigning it in. We also talked about strategies for things that occupy your mind in a productive way.

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I have not tried his either. Will be adding it to my 2020 evaluation of chocolate chip cookies.

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If you're up for trying another, my favorite is from Everyday Reading. I make them all the time and my household devours them.

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If I can figure out a way to do this without you ending up with a box full of crumbs, I will!

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I moved last Friday and it went great! Thanks to everyone who gave me such good tips and tricks about moving. I am very grateful that I have parents who graciously flew into Dallas from Kansas City to help. I know if I was married they probably would not come in town to help out, so I'm thankful for the sympathy of my parents of being "alone". They're both 60 years old and they kicked my butt. The energy they have to get things done quickly and efficiently blew my mind. I had a hard time keeping up.

I also want to say that hiring movers is a treasure. (Even if they didn't wear a mask and were huffing and puffing all over my furniture...)

I'm heading off to my best friend's bachelorette party this weekend in Northwest Arkansas and I am praying that the leaves are beautiful. Any Arkansas Swipes out there that can confirm??

Lastly, I want to take this moment to appreciate the treasure that is the song "Every time you go away" by Lennon Stella and Kevin Garrett. Such a dreamy and romantic song. 10/10 recommend to listen to on a rainy afternoon.

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Congratulations on surviving the move! Mine is next week and though I know it will be worth it, I'm already over it.

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Have fun on your weekend away! I drove through a little of Arkansas last week, and it was *starting* to get there in the leaves dept - hopefully you get good color!

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Hey gang!

So this week was a great mix of the things. My family got away to Duluth where yes, there was snow. There was ice, there was weird take out situations. BUT the house was amazing.

This was the house: https://www.airbnb.com/rooms/35737677?check_in=2020-11-10&check_out=2020-11-13&s=67&unique_share_id=5ebd4d41-9f05-48e2-87b1-b11d0236f957

Getting to wake up one morning with the sunshine pouring in to the view of the lake was amazing. We had to wake up very early when we left on Tuesday because – yeah, we had to race snow. SNOW IN OCTOBER. And it’s snowing today. It looks like a snowglobe outside. So fun fact *dings* - I am a lifelong Minnesotan, I have snowflake tattoos on my left leg (my kids were both born in snowstorms) – but every winter I have to really muster up my energy. I also become part housecat, I sit in windows when its sunny to trick myself to thinking that warmth is not winter. But again, it was a lovely time away and we are hoping to rent the same place in the spring. It was a perfect place in Duluth proper.

I got to knit (finishing two hats for Swiper Sarah and I will start a scarf for Cathy and a shawlette for Sharon). I got to read books, we got to just chill. I got to see my dad, drink many a beer, watch movies, it was just what we all needed.

Other treasures for my week

Green puppy! https://www.today.com/pets/unfur-gettable-meet-pistachio-puppy-born-green-fur-t195666

Morning show DJs I am friends with now have a podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/show/ben-and-dana-got-fired

I am truly friends with both of these guys and its so fun to hear them again.

This article, really needed this gratefulness reminder: https://www.oprahmag.com/life/a34330280/o-readers-thankful/

Local band I love debuted a new song: https://open.spotify.com/track/3BmFmczO6QoaJYWa0yiGyY

For those of you who love Robin Williams, this was a great podcast I binged last year that was really quite a testament to him: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/knowing-robin-williams/id1482972205

I need to dive back into all the work things (boo) but I am here for everyone’s treasures.

Thank you for all being you.

Mel

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Down with snow in October 😂😂 but so glad for your weekend away and your sweet treasures! And giggling over QTNAs

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HAHAHAHA yes, love that. I am not sure what made me laugh more, Jamie's giggle or Knox's facial reactions. I love when Knox breaks.

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We live in Montana and it’s snowing right now— which is early but it’s beautiful and feels like it gives purpose to the cold. I’m with you on sitting in the window like a house cat. The older I get the more I find that I just want to sit in the sunshine (but inside where it’s temperature controlled because I’m not insane), drink my coffee, and pretend I can’t hear my kid asking for water for the 80th time (it’s *literally* right next to your hand).

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The crazy thing Allie, is we were supposed to initially be in Yellowstone this week! So I'm sort of glad that got cancelled. It's one thing to have snow in your own state. But another when you are states away and have to drive home.

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Oh gosh, you’re right. Driving on snow in an unfamiliar place is rough! Hopefully you get to make it back soon!

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Oh we were fortunate to have changed our vacation to someplace closer to home and we did plan in a way that we got home long before the weather got scary.

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That house is amazing! And the list of books and knitting and beers and window sunshine...it all sounds delightful. I'm so glad you got some time away.

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Karen, truly it was lovely.

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I love snow so, so much, but even I think snow in October is a bit too early...

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I don't mind snow when I'm home and don't have to go anywhere ;) But yeah looking at the extended forecast -- winter has arrived. WAY too early.

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Maybe that's why I like it, I never go anywhere... 😉

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Have you tried one of those light therapy lamps? I have a friend with SDD that swears by it.

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I haven't officially been diagnosed with SDD, I definitely notice how I feel when I don't see sunlight. I uptick my Vitamin D intake and try to eat lots of veggies and fruit even more in the winter. I have this weird theory about eating sunshine making be feel brighter ;)

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Oh I do that. But still gotta show up to work.

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Oh, that place in Duluth looks DELIGHTFUL. And, even after living in MN for the first 27 years of my life, I still have to psych myself up for winter - and Kansas winters aren't nearly as cold.

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It was a fabulous house! We cannot wait to rent it again.

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A dusting here and there in October? Not rare. But having it STICK and be plowable and shovelable (that's a word, go with me)........... yeah um no

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Yeah we have PILES in our parking lot at the office due to what has been plowed and collected. It makes me really sad to see that pile be SO big on 10/23.

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Erin, responding to your treasures first and foremost

- Thank you for Comfortable Together - it was such a gift! I would love to keep chatting with that community, and hope we will after this period

- Thank you also for the Mr. Rogers Faith Adjacent ep - it was a balm to my soul.

- I will stan forever for the Ringer, so not surprised they are the source of the GBBO edicts, of which I will hold to.

My treasures for this week:

- My birthday was Sunday, and it was one of the sweetest celebrations ever and I felt SO loved by so many people. I've already had what is likely my crappiest birthday, and celebrations had been a little fraught since, so a COVID birthday was already going to be better by comparison. But for it to be one of my fave days was saying something. Still soaking in the love 5 days later <3

- The arrival of my fancy Peloton and getting a little exercise mojo back. My booty is almost used to the seat! Shout out to Meg for being my ride buddy, and I owe you a ride!!

- One Day Hour by Hour was so fun this week and I loved seeing the minutiae of so many days (including many lil' swipes!)

- THE WEST WING REUNION SHOW. I cried so many tears of nostalgia and sweetness, and I am ready to petition for a full season of episodes restaged as this one was.

- Revisiting the HSM2 Non-Stop Dance Party remix cd (thanks, Lindsay!!!) It is the definitive fun version

And finally, what y'all love me for the most, a lil Tiktok joy

Club playing REAL bangers 🧑🏼👩🏽🏀🎭🎤🎤 - https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJ5Vpfyc/

Classic lit meets classic meme - https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJ5V79as/

An excellent dad joke - https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJ5pyYtM/

This girl’s dedication to her middle school crush though - https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJ5p9e4e/

Thank you for 10k! - https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJ5pH2vB/

Going to a place nearby, gotta go - https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJa26dUy/

Erin, this could be a real fun Bible Binge segment if you run out of ideas 😂 - https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJaS5fmw/

The answer to this high energy vid is YES - https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJaSgMfF/

Mama Mia Thermopolis - https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJamp7dQ/

“Per my last email hype energy” - https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJambF25/

How to spot a Northerner - https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJagYL49/

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Happy birthday!!

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I keep rewatching the real club banger and feel so much disappointment when it ends 😂 I need a full length song to jam to

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The as per my last email energy😂 absolutely sent me. Also, happy birthday!

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Hold up-I did not know there was a West Wing reunion show?! Going immediately to look into that.

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HBO Max! They did Hartsfield Landing as if it was a play, all with the original cast minus John Spencer. Won’t spoil who played Leo, worth the reveal!

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Loving the Jane Eyre and Bible verse TikToks. 😂

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Jane Eyre made me LOL

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Happiest of birthdays, Jillian! I wish you an upcoming year of growth and serendipity and Jesus and Disney club bangers. Thanks for bringing such happiness and warmth to this space!

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Thanks Karen, that is SO sweet! I receive each of those blessings!

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Jillian! HAPPY BIRTHDAY! I hope it was as wonderful as you! ❤

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Thanks Bethany!! It truly was 💕

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Jillian, happy birthday!!! I'm so happy you got such a lovely celebration! Also, Bible verses with zero context got me! 😂

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Thank you Rebecka, and LIKEWISE

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I am HERE. FOR. the club playing real bangers. Maybe you should curate a playlist for Swipe Up Camp?! 😆

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I would happily accept the mantel of Lil Swipes Camp DJ - now taking song requests

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That sweet tea bit is spot on! Pro-tip from my mom, if you can find a Cracker Barrel above the Mason-Dixon Line, you can find sweet tea there! My dad is a Yankee and those were spot on!

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ahahaha this is wonderful - excellent pro tip

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That How to Spot a Northerner - spot on. Love, a Minnesotan turned Kansan. (I cannot with Sweet Tea.)

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bahahaha i love it so much!

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Rebellious tea parties in your blood!

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I’m so excited for my kids to take naps so I can delight in all of these TikTok treasures

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I'm just a really bad southerner I guess, lol. I hate sweet tea (well, all iced tea) and hate the heat.

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you are NOT wrong - fair is fair! my real interest is now in West vs Midwest :) a finer line than you might think. and agreed, i died laughing!

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I'm originally from Detroit, but when I moved to Southern California after college, all of my students wanted me to say "October" over and over and over because the way they say their vowels out on the West Coast is with a dropped jaw (think the words "Don" and "dawn"---they say those words the same way). Here in the Midwest we just lengthen the sides of our mouths to say them. It's so, so fascinating!

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Baa-g vs Bay-g cracks me up to this day

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Ummm...did anyone else just weep their way through this set of treasures? No? Maybe that’s just my Enneagram 4 game going strong. So many feels. Robin Williams and WW2 heroes—gah! So much human connection. ❤️

This was a good week. I had a slower work schedule, so that meant some time to get the backlog of tasks done. Post office, errands, go through piles, etc.

After almost 5 months of being married, I’m finally sending the stuff to the Social Security office to change my name. I’ll be honest—I feel weird about it (and I’m not even getting rid of my first name...just doing a double last name, no hyphen). I feel a very strong sense of not wanting to negate who I was prior to this relationship and also of wanting to share a name with my husband. Maybe it’s because I got married at 37. Who knows. At any rate, I’ve got Enneagram 4 feelings about that, too.

My writing mentorship ended this week, which makes me a little sad. It’s been really nice to have weekly writing prompts/assignments/ goals. I’m hoping to keep creating weekly goals for myself going forward. I know there are some other writers in this space—how do you set goals for yourselves?

I feel like I could keep going because this Friday space is so comfortable. But I will stop and read how the rest of you are doing. Hope you get some rest and peace this weekend! ❤️

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I also struggled with changing my last name when I got married. Sometimes, I wish I would have taken the route that you did and taken a double last name. But other times, I like the concept of a name change to signal a shift in where you're at in life. I have a lot of weird feelings about this. Lol

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I wish I had some writing advice for you! I've been writing grad school essays since 2016, so writing for myself comes few and far between. BUT my best friend just finished her second manuscript during quarantine that she's been working on for 10 years. TEN. YEARS. I'm sure her goals changed all the time, and then all the sudden, one day, it was ready. Writing is weird. 😂 Hope you can find a new flow post-mentorship!

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Thanks, Hannah! I appreciate this perspective---that it's a marathon, not a sprint. A little at a time goes a long way. :)

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Good morning Swipes!

Erin, Mama Beth’s tweet has me in stitches this morning! I’m heading to the BMV soon to renew my Driver’s License so no puffy eyes for me in my picture! All the tear jerkers will be watched later 😉

It was an adventurous week while nannying! The almost two year old stuck a pea up his nose and a friend sent this trick. It worked!!! A little scary but all is well 😊

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=nevoAdT7Gjw

A few friends from college reconnected through a text thread and we managed to plan a girls weekend away within 24 hours. Pending covid, we will be in a giant cabin Late Spring 2020!

I feel called to write a book which is hilarious because I remember ZERO grammar lessons from school. I keep asking the Lord if He has the right gal!

I’m on the Waitlist for Hope Writers. My Enneagram 2 is battling my 3 wing because I do not want to take away from all the growth made giving our beautiful black sisters and other minorities a voice. I feel like an imposter as another “middle class white girl” wanting to share her testimony.

Thoughts on how to start writing and how to process those big questions?

Thanks friends 🥰

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It may have been Emily Freeman who said that just because you have a story that’s similar to others doesn’t mean you tell it in the same way as others. And someone might need that story in the way YOU tell it. Whatever you’ve got to say matters. Write it anyway.

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This is so good!! Thank you!

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Hey, Swipes!

I feel like I fell off the Internet wagon this week after Monday. Simply put, I was v v v busy, and some of that busy-ness drove me to the absolute necessity of sitting down after the kids went to bed with some wine and melting my brain with The Bachelorette (GAHHHH what a train wreck of an episode). But anyway, here we are. It’s Friday, and I have a counseling appointment today, so praise be.

My treasures:

⭐️ Beautycounter came out with a concealer to go with their Skin Twin foundation, and I'm suuuuuper excited to try it (https://www.beautycounter.com/creamy-concealer).

⭐️ Space-themed decor for my younger son's birthday coming up. He will be 1 this coming Wednesday, and truthfully, I am not sure how that's possible. I ordered one of those themed party packs from Amazon, and um, well, it's a situation. 😂 https://smile.amazon.com/gp/product/B07VWGTST2/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_title_o01_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1

⭐️ Update on Penny & Sparrow's live show that happened last Friday: It was phenom. They played my favorite, favorite song "Just And Just As," (https://open.spotify.com/track/3RqJuWenHnO7fdhh4pN1jX?si=2av7Ivg0QN2-cEDY56inCg) and I may have teared up/become overwhelmed with emotion. It's fine. My accompanying cocktail was a whiskey sour with pomegranate simple syrup, which was quite delightful. You can still buy a ticket & watch the show until Sunday! https://www.pennyandsparrow.com/store-live-stream

I guess that's it? My plan for the weekend is to go over my ballot (PA only has 6 races other than the Presidential race), so hopefully I can vote early next week.

Hope you all have a great weekend!

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Wait, it this space themed party for the kid who's dressing up as an astronaut on Halloween? I can't handle the cuteness!

I love "Just And Just As" and now I want a pomegranate whiskey sour.

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YES! It is! I decided since his birthday is so close to Halloween, a theme that goes with his costume would be appropriate/easy 😂

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mmm let me know what you think about that concealer! and so excited to see birthday party times!!

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will def let you know!! & yesss I can't wait to share pics!

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I’ll be doing my ballot this weekend, too. Probs gonna need one of those whiskey sours to help.

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Yuuuup, I feel that.

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AH yes, as much as it overwhelmed me to see it in person haha, I am so excited to see how it all turns out!

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Hi friends! 

Diving in with a list of treasures on this lovely Friday morning! 

☕️ a 30 minute later start at work on Wednesday morning often means I can get coffee before going into work 

🍰 homemade pie crust - Sunday evening, I was really in the mood for quiche (which is weird because I've had an aversion to quiche since a "traumatic event" middle school). I made this bacon and potato one with a homemade gluten free pie crust. Y'all, I swear I heard the angels singing when I took that first bite. Mary Berry would have been proud - there was no soggy bottom. Quiche recipe: https://spicysouthernkitchen.com/bacon-potato-quiche/

🍨 Y'all, this week I figured out to make a knock off version of the pumpkin cream in starbucks pumpkin cold brew 😍 If you whip the cream first and them add the pumpkin, it is firmer - bonus points if you dip some of the homemade pie crust leftovers into the pumpkin whipped cream. 

🎧 when reading the comfortable words this week, I put on Audrey Assad's Siloh - "When pain comes to show you/ What you'd rather not know/ What will your heart do?/ What will you let go?.....May loving kindness/ Calm the raging of the wound/ May your healing/ Be a clearing in the wood/ May you breathe in/ Deeper than you ever could before" Highly recommend. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wtRLayKoyB4

📚 I got my diploma for my Master's degree last week.  

I can't wait to read about the rest of your weeks. I hope you have the best weekend available to you 💜

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Mmmm.... pumpkin whipped cream sounds amazing.

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Woo! Congratulations on your diploma!

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WOO HOO DIPLOMA! What an accomplishment! Nice work! :)

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CONGRATULATINONS!!!!!

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Congratulations! I'm waiting to hear if I've been accepted for my master's program.

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Congratulations!!!

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Mmmm, I love a good quiche. Thanks for sharing!

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Gluten free pie crusts are tricky! Good job, you! And huge congratulations on getting your Master's!!!

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YAY for diplomas!!! Congrats! And that Audrey Assad song is a favorite of mine. ❤️

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Same!!

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BACON. POTATO. QUICHE? sign me up!

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A cold front has moved in this morning so I’m sitting here listening to the rain and gentle rumbles of thunder. A good way to start out a Friday.

This week was a lot. It started happy with a day off on Monday and my dog’s birthday ice cream outing. But then a traumatizing medical experience midweek has been affecting me a lot. I’m now carrying emotional sadness and physical pain from that.

I’m low on treasures right now, but one good one is Mindy Kaling sharing a cheesecake bar recipe: https://www.instagram.com/p/CGp7tHMBB6W/?igshid=p4a4k7yl9qfc I made them last night and did half Oreo crumbs for the crust. They are delicious and super easy to make.

And this piñata dog toy has been a huge hit https://www.petco.com/shop/en/petcostore/product/bark-full-o-fluff-pinata-dog-toy-large-3180967?cm_mmc=PSH-_-GGL-_-CCY-_-CCO-_-PET-_-AQU-_-0-_-PM_GGL_FY20_SBU04_Supplies_BOPIS_NewCust_LIA-_-0-_-0&gclid=CjwKCAjw_sn8BRBrEiwAnUGJDi9brZ_5aCN7s89nmZYZNgIjZ7vRkimYlNdUhNihV14pArbkQtGdXBoCHfkQAvD_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds

Now I’m just hoping for a quiet, restful weekend

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I'm so sorry to hear this! I hope that your weekend will be what you need it to be.

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That’s so rough! I’m sorry!

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i'm so sorry, A! please let me know if I can do anything specifically, you know where to find me on IG <3

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Thank you, Jillian! I just booked a Disney world trip for next May which has brought some joy into my day 😄

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GOOD CAN’T WAIT TO EAT AND MEET

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Ugh, I'm so sorry about your sadness and pain. ❤

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Thank you ☺️

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I’m so sorry about your hard week—I hope you are able to find peace and rest this weekend. ❤️

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Thank you, Karen

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I hope the rain and gentle rumbles are a soothing balm for your heart. I know they always help me. Im sorry about your hard week. <3 rest well!

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Thank you ☺️ The rain definitely helps

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Love Devi's post! Can we just act like actual human grownups online instead of cranky middle schoolers? I am so thankful for this space to be a vulnerable actual human grownup.

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Sister Beth though! 😂 I feel like she’s been watching Jezzie-Bath parody videos on TikTok- cause that’s a JB caption alll the way 😂

Had a turd in the form of a flat tire Wednesday. I started to cry cause it happened on lunch and I just wanted to go home, but I stopped, texted James to commiserate and get the warm happies of knowing he’d drop all to come help me. (I didn’t let him though Wednesdays are busy for him) Then I walked to get Mexican food, came back and made a video of me changing my tire which tickled me to no end. Cause I’m HILARIOUS. I got a squats workout in the process. So silver linings!

When I dropped the tire at James house after choir he and his roommate were out with a patch kit immediately to see what could be done... but then he took one look at the tread and started yelling (just the exclamation voice, not the stern talking to the dogs voice) “SARAH THIS TIRE IS BALD!!!” And had to check all the other tires. So i got hugged, comforted and firmly instructed to buy new front tires ASAP. Ooof my car fund.

Here’s the treasure I made out of the turd: https://www.instagram.com/p/CGnZQQxnA9N/?igshid=1metue8cc9bla

Also. Next weekend, should no one get covid or have other medical emergencies, the Boy is finally coming home with me to my parents. I’m stoked and terrified. What if they don’t like him?! What if politics come up!!!

I realized I’m super independent and that though I talk to my mom weekly, she doesn’t exactly know how I feel about James. Maybe that’s cause I’m cautious and reserved about getting her hopes up? but I told her the yesterday about Serious Things conversations beginning and I was like “ hey I know this might be weird for you to hear having not met him yet...” I don’t want her to feel left out (I know she struggled with that with my sister’s dating relationship and getting married). But also, I’m almost 30. I’m on my own. I respect and love my parents but I’m a fully launched fledgling here. I don’t know how to be and how to love her best though this.

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I didn't even tell my parents that my now-husband existed until we had been dating for a few months, and it was partially because I also couldn't handle the immediate high hopes that my mom always conveyed whenever I mentioned anyone that I might even remotely be talking to. I was 35 when he and I started dating, and I didn't want that feeling of "my parents are just so happy that I'm not Mary Bennett that they don't really care about the actual quality of this person and why I like him...they are just glad he exists at all." It sounds like you know what you need---boundaries that help you keep what is yours YOURS. You mentioned that the other week, too: the idea that you want to keep some things to yourself because they are just yours and no one else's. I don't think you need to apologize or feel bad about this. I think the best way to be is to be upfront and honest about the boundaries that you need in order to live your best almost-30-something life. It sounds like you want to include your mom, and so I think you love her by being clear about where you want her to be involved and where you don't. It sounds like you're doing an amazing job of asking yourself what works best for you, and that's all any of us can do!

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Very impressive changing of the tire! I don't think I would have the courage to film myself, I prefer there be no evidence in case I mess up... 😉

I've had this little sticky note with your name on it on my laptop since you asked for prayer a few weeks ago and I'll add the stuff with your parents to the things I pray about.

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i loved your flat tire changing video. and step one of my flat tire changing process is cry for 2 minutes so that i can then deal with *the rest*. you are also very much allowed to be independent about your relationship - I hope your mom can manage her own feelings about this and communicate any desires she has to know/share, but this is all you. Fingers crossed for an excellent meeting!

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co-sign with Karen and Dana. Tt's either triple a or my dad, but there's always crying 😂

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I think my first 2 minutes would be a healthy stream of profanity. Then call AAA.

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I also would be using very colorful language through the tears prior to calling triple a

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100% same, Dana 😆

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I briefly worked with the girl who is "Jezzie-Beth" on TikTok. She is actually a very talented photographer and left the ministry I work for to do photography full time. I really don't know her but I saw her on TikTok and was dumbfounded that she went TikTok famous.

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So proud of you for tackling that tire! And for the conversations with parents about dating!

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The sticky business of being adult women in the world. The good news is she doesn’t know how to be and how to love you whilst you and James tackle serious conversations. She’s figuring it out just as you are. I always tell my kids I don’t know how to parent a ______ year old kid any more than you know how to be that age! We are figuring it out together. I just promise to do my best!

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Every girl should be able to change a tire! Brought back memories of how I had so many flat tires one summer and was practically a pro at changing them. 💪

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Suuuch a bummer about the tires $$$. Your video was really interesting to watch, though! The car going up and down was cool to see sped up. Thanks for sharing :)

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I need a baby stroking my face right about now.

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DEAD from mama Beth's tweet. She always knows what we need.

Also been loving the comfortable words this week! Esp. loved today, sheeeeweee. Some friends and I are doing it together and it's been so needed.

Some things I've been loving:

-At Night podcast. Created to help you wind down before bed!

-The Chosen Series. Yes Lord!!!!!

-Poshmark always. I make low ball offers sometimes to get the bargining going, and sometimes they just accept my low ball offer. Like my new Hoka sneakers for $22. Also, don't sleep on Hoka sneakers.

-Wearing an actual face mask (charcoal mask by Beautycounter) under my actual mask for my long mask days (really only Sunday's!) You'll look crazy on the way to your destination, but you'll be protecting those blemishes and feeling fresh afterwards instead of like a greasy hotdog. You're welcome.

Happy Friday peeps!

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Also cackling at Mama Beth’s tweet! 🤣 and what a genius move to use the Beautycounter Charcoal mask underneath a real mask! Well done 👏🏼

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I have a few treasures in a crabby mountain of turds.

My 4 year old is adding more and more words to his vocabulary. It such fun to now get to hear his personality as well as see it. We found a preschool that will take him, put him in the correct age group. It was very frustrating trying to explain that his speech is delayed but genuinely nothing else is! But finally someone listened and he’ll start school in January.

My thyroid meds seem to be heading in the right direction. If anyone commented last week about bonkers thyroid issues by thyroid doctor told me to take 1000mg of vitamin C to help the hormone absorb properly- obviously check with your doctor. Also she said add loads of b12 to help as well!

In all other areas of life I’m doing my best to stay afloat, to not be overtaken by the mood of the country or the people around me- it’s hard work but it’s fine. I’ll be fine.

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Woop, I'm so glad you found a school! And it must be so great for your son to be able to express himself more and more! I hope that the meds continue to head in the right direction and that it will make the staying afloat easier.

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so glad for preschool! keep swimming, friend. loving your column!

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Awe! Thank you!

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So much truth in Finding Nemo’s “just keep swimming.” One day at a time. You’ve got this.

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Girl, I am swimming!!!!

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So glad you found a preschool! He'll have so much fun!

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He’ll beside himself with glee! He needs to be around age appropriate peers to hear/ mimic their words and sounds. I’ve very excited for him!

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So exciting about the preschool and the thyroid. The mood typhoon =relatable.

You are doing it.

You are here.

We see you.

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Thank you, my sweet friend!

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hooray for your 4 year-old! I was enjoying some of your stories with him talking this week!

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Moments of chattiness make driving 45 minutes one way to speech therapy three times a week worth it!

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"as though AA Milne write The Vampire Least" 😂😂 My daughter moved to rehab this week, and I'm just trying to focus on one day at a time, and feeling all the emotions.

Treasures: my mom helped my son make a fire truck costume for Halloween. He wanted it to be the fire truck from the picture book "I'm Brave", and y'all it is bonkers amazing. I am terrible at that kind of thing, so there cheers for mom!

Here's a tweet/retweet about a very unusual family death tradition: https://twitter.com/mstiefvater/status/1318673749571416066?s=19

Love to you all!

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I'm still praying for your daughter, Amanda!

Jewelry with teeth from deceased family members used to be a thing! Google teeth mourning ring!

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Aw, I love that he got the costume! I'm a children's librarian and my kids love that book!

I'm glad you're giving yourself permission to feel all the feelings. It's hard but always better.

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Um, that tradition, what the what? I wonder what they do if someone has dentures?

Keeping you and your daughter in my prayers, Amanda!

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You are not forgotten on the hard days, Amanda 🥰 Still praying for expedited healing over your daughter and for supernatural strength for you each day. Thank you for giving us updates!! I hope you’re being gentle with yourself and allowing yourself to feel all the feelings because you have been through a whirlwind of hard stuff. You are amazing!

What a special treat for your mom to make the Halloween costume! That’s amazing 😊

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Ugh, *LESTAT. Stupid autocorrect

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Destroyed by that Nicholas Winton clip ❤️❤️❤️ I love learning about WWII heroes.

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Have you read Code Name, Helene? I know there are so many WWII books out there, but I particularly loved this one! It’s about a BA woman who was a spy in WWII.

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That book is literally next to me on the floor right now. I’ve heard such good things and can’t wait to start it!

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That Mr. Winton clip had me bawling earlier this week. When they all stand up....ugh, cannot even.

It's been a strange week - both dragging and flying by, winter and summer weather, sweet times with my boys and a newly sassy 8 year old - yings and yangs everywhere.

Treasures:

- again, Comfortable Together. This has been such a joy over the last two weeks. I am so sad it ended today, but loved what I found through it.

- there's been quite a few enneagram posts on IG that have been ON THE NOSE this week for this 9. My favorites:

https://www.instagram.com/p/CGqCktqBLGQ/

https://www.instagram.com/p/CGiddvMgwAg/

- our library is holding a "Kid President" election, and I am using that along with some other things to teach my kids about the election process. The kids running are SO. CUTE. and SO. GENUINE. It is killing me that my boys have to just pick one to vote for!

- I purchased A Kid's Book About Voting https://akidsbookabout.com/collections/all-products/products/a-kids-book-about-voting to also use for some voting education, and it is so so good. My boys were fascinated with the history of voting in the US (quote from my oldest, "Wait, girls couldn't vote?!?!?" No, son, no they could not).

- We've been listening to audiobooks in the car, and we just started the Children of the Red King series by Jenny Nimmo. My boys love it, and so do I - the sign of good kids books, and a good audiobook (narrator is key). The first is Midnight for Charlie Moon. I describe them as "X-Men meets Hogwarts."

- A friend of mine hosted an embroidery class, and now I am hooked. It's going to be a good winter hobby. I am finding it weirdly calming, plus I get something pretty at the end!

Hope you all have a great weekend!

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Those 9 memes are good ones!

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Totally saving A Kid's Book About Voting!! And the Red King series. I am so excited to get into book series with my boys someday. How early did you start reading books like that with them?

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My oldest and I read the first Harry Potter when he was 5 or 6 - he was REALLY into a HP Lego set he had (because of the owls) and wanted to know more of the story. He lost interest, and we picked it up again last year when he was 7.5. My middle son, who is now 6, also started HP last year. We've stopped at book 4 for my oldest, book 3 for my youngest, and will pick it up again when they are a bit older.

We've read other chapter books/series with varying degrees of success - Roald Dahl was a hit, Magic Treehouse is hit and miss, Indian in the Cupboard was meh to them, Bunnicula was amazing. I think it just depends on your kid - attention span, interest level, etc. Audiobooks seem to be more entertaining than me, too.

I will say, I feel like this past year (2019 and 2020) was the first year my two oldest had the attention span and the desire to dive into series. My youngest is 3 and has no interest in these long books, so I let him do his own thing while I read to his big brothers.

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This is so good. Thank you for so thoroughly answering my question! Ha! I have friends who started reading longer books to their kids pretty early (like 3-5). While I wanted to try it with our 3-year-old, my husband didn't feel the same, and he's the one who reads to him every night, so. 😂 We'll get there. There are some really wonderful picture books these days, so I can definitely hold on to reading those while they are still little. I know I'll miss them someday!

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That kid president election sounds amazing. And I’m also a big embroidery fan! While we were in the midst of a season of waiting for children, I started embroidering hoops to put in our future nursery- it was my way of keeping hope alive and praying for the kids who would come into our family, and it definitely helped calm my anxious thoughts many many times.

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Oh, what a lovely way to have tangible hope! I love this!

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Beth Moore. God bless her. I know I'm only 30 and probably young enough to be her daughter, but same same.

My sweet treasure is Falcon's debut album called "Nova" (Falcon is the mainstream pop alter ego of Amanda Cook, formerly of Bethel Music, and while I can't read her mail and she intentionally keeps her life private, I have this feeling that her feelings about her time there are as mixed as mine lol). She writes so vulnerably about mental health, life after divorce, and romance, and it's so refreshing. If anyone has any music recommendations, please post them here, I'm always looking for new bands!

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I'm gonna go check that album out, it sounds really interesting!

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Oh wow! This is so interesting!! Excited to check it out. Did you also spend time at Bethel? No judgement whatsoever, just curious about your experience ❤️

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Oh man, I should've clarified, I am so sorry! No, I have never been to Bethel Church ever, but for a few years, I was an uber charismatic believer and I still believe in miracles, healing, tongues, etc. However, my theology regarding those things have improved a ton, thanks to people like Erin of course, and I am, to say the least, not on board with the political leanings of the head leaderships. And I am mainly curious about Amanda's views on things, but again, with her divorce and moving out on her own to LA and everything, I am so nonjudgmental about her staying off social media for the most part and leading a private life. <333

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Thanks for sharing that! 😊 I am also curious to hear her views. Thank you!

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I love Amanda Cook, and am so excited to check this out!

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Beth Moore is such a treasure. I’m laughing so hard at that tweet 😆

Turd/tech support request- does anyone know how to block someone on Voxer? On Wednesday, I was minding my business, on a walk with my mom, aunt, and my two little wild women, when I got a picture Vox from someone who’s name I didn’t recognize but was very close to someone I knew when I lived in Africa. (I’m sure you can tell where this is going...) I was immediately suspicious, but I was naively under the impression that only people who were in my contacts could send me a Vox, so I opened it and of course it was a dukachu. 🙄🤢 I briefly considered writing something along the lines of “oh no! That doesn’t look normal. You should probably get that checked out” and also briefly considered trying to locate the only picture of my hooha I’ve ever sent someone (frantic “What is happening?!!?” message to my best friend/former roommate/friend who is a nurse when I was a week postpartum and something was NOT right with my undercarriage) but also decided against that. I’ve received 3 more messages which I’ve deleted unopened, but cannot figure out how to block this person and make it stop. After the most recent one, I submitted a help request to Voxer and the response I got back was basically “maybe we’ll help you, maybe we won’t. If you upgrade to premium, we’re more likely to help you.” 😐

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I just figured it out!!!! Praise Jesus! If anyone else ever need to know:

Click the 3 lines at the top left

Select My profile

Under your contacts, click “see more”

Search for the name of the creeper

Click on the persons name, then the gear at the top right, and THEN smash that block button

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I did find that, too, and I at least now know how to make my account as private as possible. He still managed to send another picture even after I changed my settings, so 🤷🏻‍♀️ So gross

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YUCK. Again, boo Voxer for not having options to fully block people. And also trying to make you give them $$ to help. Gross.

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Ewww! I've never had Voxer so I can't help but I hope you're able to block him! (It would have been funny if you told him to get it checked out though 😂)

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Something was NOT right with my undercarriage. Imma be laughing at that all DAY.

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I thought something was wrong, called my husband into the bathroom, and the look on his face cemented that all was not well 😂

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Nooo! Ugh.

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If his number shows up in your contacts you can go to your contacts, hold it down and the option to block and delete will pop up- sorry friend!

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He’s not in my contacts 😫 I get spammy texts all the time (never sexually explicit, just annoying) but I was beyond shocked that I could get a spammy Vox 😞

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So can you add him and then block him? I've never used Vox so I'm just guessing.

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I feel like even if you had never told us that you work in education, I would have known just from this comment. The former educator in me sees the current educator in you.

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Yes and amen! Keep it to yourself gross voxer man 🤢

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Yeesh. You got me ugly crying before 7am. Mr. Winton, man. Total turd of a day yesterday. Marital tension, accidentally texted husband some processing thoughts about said tension that was meant for a friend, son voms in the car, MIL goes to ER (cancer issue), husband stays with MIL overnight in hospital where he says "there were COVID patients all around us." Cool cool. It's all fine. NEW MERCIES IN THE MORNING IN THE FORM OF THIS NEWSLETTER. I need to go get a loaf of bread, get under a blanket, and watch GBBS.

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new mercies for sure! enjoy the bread, and praying!

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Oh my. What a week. Eat all the bread. I hope you get some rest.

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Oh dear... Blanket, bread and GBBS sounds like a good plan! Hope it makes everything better.

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Oooooh, girl. Prayers & hugs & wishing you all the coziness this weekend.

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Oooff. Blanket and Bake Off sound about right. Hugs.

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Big big hugs to you today ❤️

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I’ve done that horrible text mix up too! I’m sorry that your day was rough.

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Thanks. Lesson learned. Distracted texting is dangerous!

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Sending processing thoughts to my husband that are meant for a friend is one of my greatest fears- hang in there!!!

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Ugh. I could have puked. Thankfully it was a text about MY part of the situation, and not talking about him/his part of it, but it still was so uncomfortable. Don’t text distracted!

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oh man. Just big internet hugs today.

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Thank you 😊

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Erin! I was 👏 un👏pre👏pared for those Robin WillIams and Mr. Winston clips. Those men were absolute treasures. Thank you for sharing.

🚙 Like many others, our family life has changed pretty dramatically in the past seven months. I gave up my job and now home school my third grader and first grader. My PreK daughter rocks an online PreK that is truly amazing. All this to say, yesterday we took advantage of the flexibility that home school provides and traveled from GA to NC to celebrate my husband’s grandfather’s 95th birthday. This is always a bit of an undertaking (think extra quarantine leading up to the trip, and travel potty in the back of our mini-van so we don’t have to stop anywhere!), but man, it was so good to have something to look forward to all week. Then getting to come here and celebrate with a very small group of people we love very much was just good for the soul. Documenting it all on IG for #onedayHH was extra fun too.

📸 Speaking of #onedayHH, it’s always such a highlight of the fall. This year has so few communal experiences that getting to live an ordinary day with each other is such a peaceful joy.

📻 Brené Brown always puts out such great work, but three recent episodes of her Unlocking Us podcast have been exceptional. Jason Lasso, Burnout, and the Joe Biden eps were all moving and enjoyable.

👟 I turned 38 last week and have finally resigned myself to the fact that I have to wear good shoes. Maybe it’s from a lifetime of wearing cute and trendy Target shoes that had no support? 😉 Seriously though, ponying up the money for Brooks Adrenaline sneaks and Vionic ballet flats was a sacrifice, but I feel like I’m walking or exercising on clouds when I wear them.

📩 I voted last week. I teared up and prayed while doing so. The past few years have been so difficult for so many, and I have felt so dismayed and honestly gobsmacked by what I’ve seen and heard “Christian” leaders do and say. Praying for a change and twirling my way out of political conversations that are not going anywhere. I’m also gleefully recycling campaign mailers and ignoring all of what POTUS says and does for the next few weeks. ✌️

Looking forward to this thread as always! Have a great weekend!

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Good supportive shoes are a blessing from the LORD. VIonic and Brooks are the best, and I just ordered a pair of Taos shoes...I will report back in how they feel.

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37 here and I’m so with you on good shoes. I haven’t decided what shoes I consider to be that yet, though. Tell me more about these ballet flats!

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I got these, but when they were 50% off (sad trombone that they're no longer on sale). I like them a lot! https://www.vionicshoes.com/caroll-ballet-flat.html?76=266

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The biggest lesson of your late 30s/early 40s is GOOD SUPPORTIVE everything. Footwear, undergarments, people.....

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I could not agree with you more. Yes to all of this.

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Anything between me and the floor gets $$$ spent on it! Shoes, mattresses, tires! I think I heard Erin say this on one of the shows recently and I agree with my whole heart! 💓

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It honestly feels like those campaign mailers are showing up like owls at Privet Drive these days. The emotions & prayers are both so real - thank you for sharing ❤️ And happy belated birthday! So glad you got to spend time with family.

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Yesss!

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This Harry Potter reference is everything.

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Thankful you got to go see you family!! You are creating memories for a lifetime! I was homeschooled for two years (middle school) due to traveling extra curriculars... and traveling with my family are some of my greatest memories as a child! Thank you for doing that for you kiddos 😘

Proud of you for voting and for your earnest prayer before the Lord. Such honesty and wisdom in your words!

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I have been burning all of my campaign mailers in my fireplace; it feels very cathartic😊

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Dang it! Now I gotta get a fireplace!!

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I was just wondering how much kindling I would have had if I didn’t recycle them all 🤣 Awesome idea, Bethany! 👏🏼

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Listen, the South Carolina Republican Party has been sending almost full sized posters weekly. I can't, I just can't. Plenty of kindling at my house. 😂

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I am genuinely ignoring all things related to campaigns of any kind. Nothing of value is being said.

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So glad you got to visit your family! And yes, good shoes are highly underrated.

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These comments are why I love you both. You are my people.

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Good shoes, good undies are a must! Invest in your feet and your bum!

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As an Australian, I 100% support anyone moving to the Southern Hemisphere. It's a happy, happy place to be and our covid management isn't too bad. My state is sitting on 2 new cases right now, and that's pretty great.

That said, this week I've had a comical amount of time spent going between medical appointments with my husband. We went from struggling to conceive to a doctor suspecting he had cancer, very very quickly. Thankfully it isn't cancer but there's still issues we don't understand and so there are more tests and more bills and honestly, I'm tired. I wont bore you with the details. Here's some treasures though:

- this recipe was my lifesaver tonight. It smells delightful, it tastes amazing, and it's all on one tray: https://www.taste.com.au/recipes/greek-lamb-meatball-tray-bake/9f5dfw6z

- new churches with lovely ministers. We've been trying to find a church home and two weeks ago visited one near us and immediately fell in love when they spoke affectionately about one another, and then about serving their community by feeding those who are struggling. I cried. I felt like we'd found our kin. Then, ooooh, then, we went back a second week and felt welcomed again by those who spoke to us afterwards, and the minister asked if he could come over for tea. He did that, and stayed for three hours while we talked about our stories and our passions and our chickens and our dog and our God, too. He knew me when I was a teenager, and catching up felt good. Better yet, he sees ways that we could fit into the community and has even said with my background in ministry/theological studies, that he'd be happy to have me preach. MY HEART. I'd given up on that dream. What a treasure.

- I fed him cookies, because that's what I do when people come over. And it's this cookie recipe I keep going back to, and so do so many of my friends. It freezes well in balls and if you add white chocolate chips into the situation, you'll find much joy. https://www.thebakingchocolatess.com/perfect-chocolate-chip-cookies/

So. Yes.

Turd of a week with some treasures in there.

I stuck something on the Got You file but man, there's so much there to meet and I want to meet all the needs and yet, I just sit there and ask God to do what I currently can't... that's enough, right?

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Totally loving everything about your church and minister. A treasure, indeed!!

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I just love the story of when the minister came over! ❤

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What a week for you!

Thank you Jesus for no cancer!! But, I’m sorry you have to go through all this testing when you’re struggling to try and start a family. You are not alone. You are seen. I’ve been trying to become a momma for 7 years now. Know that you have people in your corner rooting for you!

And yay for finding a church home, reconnection, and feeling like you belong. So so good!

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I will be praying for you as you navigate all of those appointments and questions- specifically for medical professionals who see you and care for you well, for answers, and for a great support system of people around you as you wait and sit in the uncertainty ❤️ Also- so thankful for that church!! 🙌

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What a roller coaster you're non right now! Praying for your husband and yourself and the medical issues. I'm so glad this church has come into life at what seems like just the right time.

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Tamara, that’s a complete medical whirlwind! Praying that your husband gets answers soon and that you don’t get buried in bills and uncertainty in the mean time.

I can’t imagine how awesome it would be to live in a place with such great leadership during the pandemic. And finding a new church home? Truly a gift.

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Cheers to the weekend off! I'm glad you are feeling a little lighter right now too.

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Hi Lily! I've been around the mental-health-meds block a few times and Lexapro is my favorite in terms of effectiveness and no side effects. I hope it works for you, but like Reannon said, don't be afraid to advocate for yourself! <3 <3 <3

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Enjoy your time off! I'm so glad you've found some relief. I take Lexapro and Burspar as extra when needed. It makes things so much better, and there is no shame in that.

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Enjoy your weekend!

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Lily, I'm so glad you're feeling a little lighter! Have a wonderful weekend off!

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enjoy your weekend off! what relief! and so proud of you for asking for help <3

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I will always advocate for meds for mental health (they have saved my life] and for speaking up when one of them isn’t working for you! So proud of you for taking care of yourself. And so happy you have a weekend off at home!

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I tried Buspar for a while and it was not great for me, either. I applaud you for being willing to try something new to help yourself however you need. And for talking about it! This is how we loosen the stigma around therapy and meds and mental health. Thanks for sharing. ❤️

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I have to watch the West Wing. I feel like it would be right up my alley. Also, praaaaise that you are feeling some relief with Lexapro. Enjoy your weekend off!!

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listen, don't let your boss rain on your creation appreciation parade! that is HILARIOUS

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If you ever find a nasal spray that makes you stop growing out, or forward as my cousin says, please let me know! Also, I'd never heard of Tana French until today so now I'm excited to check her out.

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I am cracking up at what your boss said. Oh my word. 😆

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What a treasure watching Obama make that speech was for me. I love all the ways he shows up but I especially loved the “don’t boo, vote” vibe I felt in this one. I don’t think there’s a lot of us that look forward to frost. We had a stormy day turned humid and sunny yesterday. Who wants that when you already have your ugg slippers and ratty cashmere out for the chill? Bring on the frost!

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Probably one of the most incompatible things between my husband and I are our weather preferences. He is like a lizard wanting warm weather, whereas I am like a bear who wants some cold months to hibernate.

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Weather soulmate, I have found you.

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LOL. And I attribute my Scottish heritage. I refuse to believe I would not be my glorious best self on some morose bone chilling moor.

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I have The Witch Elm by Tana French on my shelf right now. It seemed like a good winter read so I've been waiting (won't have to wait much longer). It'll be my first by her!

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I read that one earlier this year! It was fun!

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