BIG ANNOUNCEMENT ENERGY before we jump in this Friday:
Comfortable Together: A 10-day online community to walk through The Comfortable Words is HAPPENING on October 12-23. Here’s how it works:
If you’ve purchased The Comfortable Words anytime over the past year, you should have received an email yesterday that gets you access to the private group. You’ve also gotten an email that gives you a discount code to share with a friend, so they can join us. If you didn’t get that email and you want to join the private group, just reply to this email and we’ll get you squared away.
If you haven’t purchased The Comfortable Words yet, you can do that here. And since you’re a Lil Swipe, a member of the Best Gang on the Internet™️, you always get the biggest discount (20%) with code SWIPEUP.
Here’s what you get:
➰ Daily emails and audio drops, as well as the PDF of all the content. ➰ Bonus content like playlists and resources. ➰ Discussion questions. ➰ Community with others who are walking through the material.
The community begins on October 12 and lasts through October 23 (no weekends).
I’m really excited to walk through this with you all. If you can’t do the group now, we might do it again. We’re trying it out right now, but if Lil Swipes is any indication, I think it will be a tender and encouraging time!
Let’s hit these treasures, yes?
🤝 We Got You Club is in full-swing! If you can please stop in and see if there are any needs you can meet. I also added another tab (brilliantly suggested by our very own Lindsay S) called I Got This! If you have any special skills that aren’t necessarily tied to money (Lindsay suggested things like looking over resumes or newborn advice), feel free to throw that in the second tab and that will help others see what you can offer and reach out.
Also, I got some great advice from Sarah Seifipour on Instagram about medical bills (she sent this to me in response to so many people dealing with stressful medical bills in the We Got You Club document):
💉 I mean just put this in my veins. The eyebrows. The sweater. Just perfection. Put it in the Louvre:
📚 I got to endorse a great book that happens to be extremely pertinent for this current season: Quieting the Shout of Should by Crystal Stine. It releases October 6, and if you pre-order, she’s including some fun bonuses. Go check it out here.
👩🏻⚖️ I thought this piece on RBG’s death and how institutional failures are ruining everything was convicting, as well as beautifully-written.
❤️ Another episode of Faith Adjacent came out on Sunday, and this month, we’re talking about purity culture. I loved making this episode, and I especially loved chatting with Devi Abraham of the Where Do We Go From Here podcast. Thank you if you’ve already listened and shared - I’ve loved hearing what you thought about it.
This newsletter is seriously such a bright spot in my week. I signed up for The Comfortable Words the SECOND I read the email last night... very excited for this. We haven't been back to our church since pre-COVID (they started in-person services in May... side-eye), and I'll be honest, I've not kept up with all of the online things and was starting to fill a bit lost.
Quick run-down here...
Treasures:
1. The Faith Adjacent Podcast on Purity Culture that our dear Erin hosted. I was yelling "that'll preach!" while scrubbing bathroom toilets today. So good. So many great thoughts to ruminate on. I read "Pure" earlier this year and it really got me thinking of how that whole culture really effed us up. Wanting to do better with my boys.
2. The Needtobreathe album (Out of Body) that was recommended here a few weeks ago is a DELIGHT! Every song is truly wonderful.
Are we still doing turds? If so...
My major one is my youngest son and his (lack of) speech. He is over 2.5 now, and speech is still preeeeetty unclear. He jabbers constantly, but I understand about 5% of it. We have had his hearing checked (fine), evaluated for a cognitive delay (twice! passed everything with flying colors!), he's in school with other kids, we read to him, let him engage in free play, he was breastfed until 2 (really reaching here... lol)... I'm outta ideas, y'all. I have people saying "oh, just give it time! he'll develop" and others like "this is a concern..." but no other ideas. He is a bright, fun, happy baby... just, not speaking. I won't lie that I've convinced myself of some of the worst possible reasons (a brain tumor, how about those times he fell as a baby?, some crazy unknown thing we don't even know yet!) Anyway - positive thoughts that we can figure out a path to take are appreciated!
I'm not usually one to post here but today has been a long day of reflecting so what's one more opportunity.
Treasures
* This week was entirely off of grad school and I spent most of hanging out with my niece and my sister, reading People magazines that have been stacking up over the six week course, cleaning my room and taking long walks.
*My nephew turned 14 last week. He started having auntie sleepovers with my sister and me probably 8 years ago. We had one last night. He's a teenager and he still wants to hang out with us. We order pizza and show him a movie we watched when we were his age. We watched the seminal '93 favorite, 3 Ninjas. Please comment if you remember this gem. I love that kid to his core and love auntie sleepover. His five year old sister has her own version of auntie sleepover now too.
*My rotating Sunday off of church is this weekend and I am going to go back to my home church. I've been interning at my (I don't know what to call it now, they both feel like home) for almost a year and have only been back to my home church twice. I can't wait to meet in person with my other church family.
*Also my friends that I usually go to the county fair are going to recreate the fair, deep fried oreos and all, this Sunday. Send me all your fair food at home recipes.
*I think I shared a Brett Elderedge video last time but he covers a Billie Eilish song, it's lovely, he's lovely, that is all.
* I dropped my laptop for the last time and it finally shattered the screen, not too much because I am currently using that laptop right now to write this but enough to know that tiny shards of glass are constantly leaching into my mother board and I live on borrowed time. Thankfully, my budget allows for a replacement that is coming on Monday. I had never realized that the adult decision making of purchasing a computer is paralleled by purchasing a vehicle or a home. I don't know what kind of RAM I need, I don't what an internal processor does...well now I do. Another silver lining to the turd is that I had a whole week off of school to take care of it.
It's been a ...week. Also month. My chronic health (both physical and mental) symptoms have kicked it up a notch and I haven't sorted out answers yet. Going for a follow up with my GP on Monday. I'm not super expectant, but I'll take what I can get at this point. I've been extra emotional dealing with my grandfather's declining health, a fight with my little sister, and RBG's passing but I'm trying to treat myself with the gentleness I would offer to friends.
A few treasures from my week:
- My sweet co-worker/bff gifted me a new mug with a Nightmare Before Chirstmas design. Two of my favorite things are halloween and coffee.
-I made Kendra's magical pancakes for the first time for dinner last night (with chocolate chips) and it's weirdly the one meal that didn't immediately trigger IBS symptoms. I have to figure out how to replace all my go to meals with gluten free, dairy free versions so this is the first recipe I'll try to do that with. (I am not excited about the increase in my already impossibly tight grocery budget).
-I have finally collected and submitted all requirements for my grad school application (Masters in Library Science) and now I just cross my fingers and wait.
-We agreed to keep my sister's cat while she temporarily lived with a friend and it has drastically improved my daily life to have a pet in the house. I'm currently trying to convince how fun it would be to have a kitten also. (100% will name it Arron Purr, Sir and probably just call it Sir and will giggle every time).
that's all for now - I am eternally grateful that it's Friday and for this community.
*Last weekend, my husband and I went to Lake Michigan with the family I nanny for and it was a DELIGHT. It was freezing but don’t you worry... I had all the cardigans and pashminas to look like a middle aged widow from every Nicholas Sparks book/movie ever! 😉 A rustic cottage with only the basics, great food and wine, and a private beach so we didn’t have to wear our masks for a little while. It was incredibly refreshing.
*This was a few weeks ago but I’m obsessed with this talking cat 😹 When he hits the “no” button consistently, it is such a mood and I’m here for it.
*My Enneagram 2w3 heart got to save the day yesterday for a friend with 4 sick little kiddos at home. She told me she loved me and I cried in my van the whole way home. Ha. I miss my friends.. it’s hard to be the only friend, childless (not by choice), and have felt very alone and forgotten in this covid season. Clearly, I know that having kids of any age can be a dumpster fire in this season is so impossibly hard.. I don’t want to diminish that. I’m just so thankful I got to see her even for a brief moment and help her out. I felt seen and loved for the first time since March.
Half turd/half treasure:
* I blew a tire on my van today right before I turned into my nanny kiddo’s preschool. But, my sweet husband came to fix the tire and my nanny dad left work and brought Chick-Fil-A for all of us! Another lady got a flat a few minutes later after me and she called AAA (while we both were waiting) and said she knew 0 men to call and that broke my heart. It made me be even more thankful in the moment and we offered to help but AAA arrived before my husband was done with my tire. I realized my privilege as well.
My week’s turd-tone was set on Monday when a friend asked me why I wasn’t engaging much with church. And I cried, because there’s many reasons I’m not engaging - from grief about losing my job in ministry late last year (yay budget issues...), and missing the team, and missing the diverse lil family my old church was, to the big church energy of this new one that leaves me feeling disconnected and like I don’t fit into the system because I’m 31 and don’t have a baby so they can’t put me in the young adults group but also not in the mums group. So. She asked this in the middle of a walk by the harbour and I cried for the remaining 3km, all the way around a lighthouse, past the people on rollerblades, and avoided eye contact with the puppies that went by because they didn’t need to see my sadness.
- I’m late to this party but I needed a friend to chat through church sads with and Sarah Bessey became that when I started Jesus Feminist yesterday. You think she’d drink tea with me?
A combination of the following has kept me from most internet things this week: an almost-1-year-old who is fighting naps RULL HARD, a 3-year-old who is waking up hungry in the middle of the night more often than not, an increasing client load at work (a blessing, but also feeling the burden of their pain and heartaches), and then you know, the world??? Sigh.
Love to you all. Happy Fall. Also, can I just say the Pumpkin Cream Cold Brew is VERY MUCH SO better than the PSL? Is this a spicy take? Anyway, it's my fave Starbucks drink ever, and if you haven't had it yet, go forth ye Swipes & try it this weekend. ❤️🍁
Ruth Graham's tweet also applies to aunts. Yesterday my six-year-old niece kept asking me to come outside and watch her skate and draw. Later she turned into a demon spawn that I had to wrestle out of skates and clothes and into a leotard for gymnastics. After a 10 minute nap on the way to class, she returned to her sweet self and begged me to stay and watch. I got to see her do her first aerial on the floor and she ran over twice to hug me. Cue the tears and exploding heart.
I missed the comments last week, but I'm looking forward to digging into them with a glass of wine tonight!
Turns out starting a career in school social work remotely in the middle of a pandemic is a TAD stressful. I gave myself a 3-day-long migraine last week (hence, missing the Lil Swipes comments).
BUT I got my first paycheck today and I'm going to Whole Foods tonight because I'm a grown woman and I deserve boujee groceries. I'm getting the ingredients to make the roast chicken Flo Pugh made on her insta stories last week (iykyk). I'm SO excited for it. I'm going to do the chicken, roasted veggies, gravy, sweet spaghetti (family recipe, I grew up eating it), and homemade biscuits. Yes, it's for just me, and I will have leftovers FO DAYS, but I'm so excited to kick off sabbath with this feast.
My church small group met last weekend in person house church style and it warmed my heart in every way possible. For back story: I was a part of a network of house churches here in Chicago for the last 3ish years and they shut down towards the end of last year. My specific location shut down just before the world went up in flames, so I've spent all of quarantine church homeless. It's been rough, but I'm in a community group at this new-to-me church with a family who used to host one of the house churches in the network and they volunteered their home last weekend to do service house church style. I lead worship, we streamed the sermon, and then spent a good hour and a half fellowshipping afterwards. It was all socially distanced and v safe, but it was just SO nice to be with other believers in person again and the fact that we did it house church style made it all the better.
Also, I cut off all of my hair last night (okay, not ALL of my hair, but it's definitely quite the change) and I'm feeling like a new woman. I'm donating 13 inches to Children With Hair Loss and saving a BOAT LOAD of dollas on conditioner. After 6 years of living in Chicago, I FINALLY found a stylist I like and who knows what's up when cutting curly hair. I gave her alllllll of my dollars.
And that video mocking the Social Dilemma KILLED ME DEAD. It's too accurate.
Oof. I haven’t posted in a couple weeks because I have been unhealthy fiving. So this week, I leaned in hard on spending time with my kids and husband and all of that, posting on social media again etc. Then yesterday I got in an argument with an uncle who said to me “I guess your feelings matter more than FACTS,” and I had a breakdown. Look, I am a FIVE. I have ALL THE FEELINGS but you’d better believe I come for the facts. I struggle to remember that feelings aren’t unimportant and misleading but sometimes completely appropriate already.
Anyway, the treasure of this turd was that it led to a good conversation with my cousin (who assured me that aside from her dad, our extended family is avoiding political conversations like the...well, they’re avoiding them) and my mom. My mom and I have been growing apart over the past few years. She now lives overseas as an m word I can’t say on the internet and with me having to make myself adult without her as well as going through some deconstruction of my faith, we aren’t as close as we used to be. So being able to share those feelings of isolation and otherness with her despite our different views was a balm.
The other hard thing from yesterday was that my six year old daughter has gotten very curious about divorce. My husband and I have assured her that we love each other and aren’t divorcing, but this led to a lot of questions about my parents’ divorce (which happened when I was her age) and that was hard. I’ve dealt with most of those feelings about my dad, but it comes back up sometimes. I didn’t include the stuff I didn’t think she could handle—he was a high school teacher who left us for a student—but it’s still hard to try to explain in a way to a six year old that someone we love can do terrible, crappy things.
Anyway, this week has not been sunshine and roses, but I’m thankful for the probably false fall we are having in SC, as well as long-distance and internet friendships. They’re the things saving my life right now. Also thankful for cross stitch, which I’m learning to do. It keeps me from some of the scrolling and it’s cathartic to stab something repeatedly and come out with something pretty.
This was a weird week for me. It sounds like I’m in good company. Here’s my mix of turds and treasures.
(1) Depression and anxiety are hard. They don’t give any warning and they increase the heaviness of a thousandfold. I tell people that on my bad days, it’s like running through Jello. I had a couple days this week where I was pretty much useless. And then I feel bad about getting nothing done. It’s a bad cycle. Today feels better. One day at a time, I guess.
(2) On Fridays I do a FaceTime crossword puzzle with my mom. It’s delightful. We had a hard relationship for a really long time. Most of my life. It’s just been this year (largely because of the Enneagram) that I’ve been able to understand her in a way that makes me appreciate her and not feel angry all the time. My parents are in their 70s, so I figure I’m going to create as many good memories as I can to balance out the difficult years.
(3) I’ve been having a hard time with my church lately. I feel disconnected and “going” (online) doesn’t make me feel better. My husband did a really wonderful job of talking me through those feelings last night and while I still feel frustrated, it feels manageable. My husband isn’t a Christian, but he does an amazing job of meeting me where I’m at and helping me make sense of my faith and my feelings.
This feels like word vomit, but it’s time for the crossword. I appreciate that this community does the opposite of my church—makes me feel connected. Happy weekend, everyone!
You did some preaching in the Faith Adjacent, and I like it!
I was reflecting on the purity culture movement and the thought struck me, it wasn't just in our sexuality, but we were expected to remain pure in many ways. Dont listen to that music or PUT ANYTHING INTO OUR MINDS THAT ISNT EDIFYING side hugs only, Harry Potter is out, but LOTR is fine because he was a christian EVEN THOUGH THERE WAS MAGIC AND WIZARDS IN BOTH (my theory: wizards were ok in LOTR bc misogyny, witches are clearly not ok because they are evil. and female.) gah! It was intense. so many rules.
Sorry, obviously that brought out lots of feelings! :)
We are still in the US and waiting to get back to France. Some days this week were harder to hold out hope. Also its been intense around here. Im living in Louisville at the moment, and lots of people have opinions and lots are grieving. It's heartbreaking. Thankfully the churches that I have heard from are trying to listen. So that is good.
My treasures:
This week in our family bible study, we were evaluating the character trait of patience. The tagline: We choose to be patient even when we feel like getting our own way. This speaks to me right now, and honestly my inner toddler wants to throw hissy fits and demand my way. If my kids can do it, I can too.
Blackberry sparkling water/sodas... who knew blackberries were so sweet?!?
VO5 conditioner... is this allowed? Something from my past that is delighting me now? well, it reminds me of the smell of my mother from when I was a child, and I find it oddly comforting, like a middle aged woman smell blanket. Also, its conditions my hair really well. I used to have flat hair but aging has changed things, including the texture of my hair?!? so I've been experimenting.
and lastly... embracing that PSL life!!! Give me all the fall, all the colors, the cool temps (sorry Deep South folks!), and cozy blankets. I need some cozy overdosy therapy right now.
I’m also listening to Sufjan’s new album today (he is one of my top 10 fave musicians)
Also, Erin, I showed my mom Hamilton for the first time this week. She clapped after every song and at the end she goes, “wow! That was amazing! But I did not know there was so much rapping in it.” 😂😂🙄
How's about that Harry Styles gif at the end... Bless us all. If you listened to this week's Popcast episode... you know I am conflicted by a simultaneous love of Harry Styles and a fear of literally everything else. So this 1950s psychological thriller is really throwing me for a loop. My current plan is to read the entire script of the movie before going to see it. So that there are no surprises. Also- I may actually take the advice and watch Get Out. But yall... I'm scared. A common quote in my house is "three spooky five me" because it's like "two spooky for me" taken up one notch. Get Out sounds three spooky. It's really causing some inner turmoil.
I have finally come around to the idea of hacking your crying. I’m more of a bury-it-deep-inside-until-it-dissolves kind of Feelings feeler, but I made the wonderful mistake of turning on Call the Midwife. It restarted in some seasons I’ve already seen, and I just planted myself in front of that TV and cried over all those babies, and Sister Evangeline, and Mary Cynthia, and Susan Mullucks all over again. And the next day was a little brighter. #latetothepartybutgladtobeherethanksforhavingme
And listen. I’m just so terrible at painting my nails. I must be the prime demographic for Olive & June though, because it seems my entire online life has been sponsored by their ads lately...and I’ve heard nothing but good reviews…but like, I’m just really bad at nails, you guys! I decided that I needed a treat/project last weekend that could be accomplished and bought the Poppy from Target to try it out.
Y’all. I meeeeeeaaaannnnnnn!
My nails are still painted! And it doesn’t look like I did it blindfolded! So now my phone is filled with screenshots of colors that I want to get and try out. If you need me, I’ll be Adding to Cart all the pretty colors I think I can pull off, and maybe a few that I would never have considered before, and crying about pretend babies, and sprinkling in GBBO as much as I can get away with this weekend!
Narrator: She learned the value of listening to her online friends that week. And she was better off because of it.
Didn't realize I needed Mr. Rogers to be my cheerleader this morning, but I definitely do!
So looking forward to going through the Comforting Words with this group! I've been pretty adverse to bible study type things for awhile, but this is a such a supportive, non-judgmental group.
Not sure if this is a treasure or turd, but this Hogwarts virtual school spoof was a little too close to home with my middle schooler's experience: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B18ss3dbRAI
It's been a rough week dealing with our health care sharing "ministry" in order to try to get my sinus surgery covered. Every time I'm on the phone with them, they ask if they can pray for me, and every time I just want to say, "Nah, I'm good on the prayer...I'd rather you just pay my medical bills." Ugh. I'm not bitter. It's fine.
I knew I was in an unhealthy place emotionally when I started getting in arguments with strangers on social media (a very NOT enneagram 9 thing to do). I'm so thankful for a good friend who asked me hard questions about how much time I was spending on social media, reading the news, and engaging in other life-giving activities vs. intake of depressing news and hot takes on social media. I reestablished the screen time limits on my phone and decided to take Saturdays as a Sabbath from social media. Thankful for a friend who can see me spiraling and ask hard questions without judgment.
Good morning, all! I’m going to ignore all the turds going on in the world for the sake of this thread.
-This is half turd/half treasure, but my Oma went to the ER last weekend with crazy high BP (something like 240/160) and ended up having to stay a few days and get a pacemaker put in. Oma is really the only grandparent who has been a big part of my life since the others died in my early childhood, and I refuse to face the fact that she’s 85 and her health is declining, so this was not and easy thing for me to hear. I’m going to visit her this weekend as she’s recovering from surgery to help her out as much as she’ll let me (if people want to know where I get my quiet stubbornness and independence from, they need only look to my mom and Oma), and I’m bringing The Boy with me so she can meet him. I’m focusing on the positive that I get to see her and have her meet Michael, and I’m praying she lives many more years, gets to be at my wedding potentially in the near-ish future, and is in good health.
-I’m not a crazy fall person, but I am very much enjoying the cooler weather this week and feeling like I can go with either hot or iced coffee right now. This is just the fall tease, and the hotter weather will return next week for a week or two, but I’m enjoying it for now.
-Schitt’s Creek. I know I’m late to this train, but this show is a delight. All of the characters really annoyed me at first and I wasn’t sure I’d get into it, but after about half a season, I was hooked. Those costumes on the little children is perfection.
Alright, that’s all I’ve got. My Fridays are endlessly boring at work, so I really enjoy going through all the links in this thread to keep me occupied when needed!
Hello Friends! So happy to see?/talk?/type? with y'all!
Erin Super Girl and the Schitt's Creek Kids were high on my treasure list this week. Excited to see both in the list!
Perhaps my biggest treasure this week is my husband. Without being asked he picked up more feminine products for favorite first born, gave them to her and told her "that he might not always have the answers, and may have to defer to your mom, but I am always here if you have questions or need anything. I will go to the store for whatever you need and any man that loves you should not have a problem getting you what you need" Y'ALL!!!! BonusDadWin As weird as it sounds I swear I fell more in love with him at that moment!
Good morning, internet friends!!! Long time no post. It has been A week, has it not? I’m going to focus on the good things this week:
I’m legit obsessed with The Home Edit and the new Get Organized series on Netflix. I’m pretty organized but they take it to a whole other level! Also, I really want to hang out with Clea and Joanna.
We watched the OG Karate Kid with my oldest son (10.5). Love it so much! We have not watched Cobra Kai yet but can’t wait!
Some of you may recall my house buying dilemma where my parents were gifting us money as a down payment but my husband wanted to use that for college for our boys. Well, thanks to a good long conversation with his mom, he and I are now both on the same page! Praise the Lord and pass the moving boxes!! Hopefully after the first of the year, we will have a new home and my kids can stop using my bedroom as their playroom! 😆
Hi, everyone! I'm usually just a reader and a "liker" in this space but today I decided to stretch outside my introvert bubble and jump into the Lil Swipe fray!
Treasures this week:
- The fireplace setting on Netflix that transforms my dimly-lit living room into a cozy fall respite (lighting all the candles and draping all hard surfaces with throw blankets helps the vibe as well).
- Tearing up while reading just the DESCRIPTION of Erin's The Comfortable Words. Gah. I'm so ready for this study.
- And lastly, I have finally joined the Game of Thrones band wagon a gazillion years late so my final treasure is short-hair-scruffy-faced Jaime Lannister.
Thank you all for sharing your highs and lows and "aggressively meh" days. They are a comfort in the midst of *gestures vaguely* all this. Happy weekend, lil swipes!
This week. Oof. From RBG to Breonna. From admissions about transfer of power after elections, to.....its a lot. It'ssssss a LOTTTTTT. I had a couple power cries. It's helped. But I wish I had more sporadic cries from something funny and absurd over rage and dismay. But now I'm posting here where good things exist.
That all being said.
Here we go with my handy and oft-updated list I kept all week.
1. People showing their good sides and making my cry for the overall hope of humanity: This is post RBG's passing. I saw so many of you posting powerful content on the Gram. I actually wept because its comforting to see who's feeling the same way I am from all over the country, world, background. It really brought me comfort because right now, feeling like an outlier for just doing what seems to be the most common sense of actions, for aligning with people who seem to genuinely want better things not just for me, but for SO MANY. Oh, I needed to see that community. I need to keep seeing it right now.
2. 4 Albino Squirrels : Okay this was actually something that happened last week but I totally spaced on mentioning it but going back to this moment brought me much joy. Danielle (fellow swiper!!) joined me on this journey of the 4 albino squirrels I saw on one outing. It was a delight.
4. Having a night out with my bestie Stacey --- Stacey is my OG-est of the OG people who know me. Note for the audio, she's actually --- wait for it -- my exstepcousin. My mom was married to her uncle and so my halfsiblings are her legit blood cousins. I have known Stace since I was 4 and we have maintained a grounded amazing relationship for now nearly 40 YEARS. Yes I have been married for nearly 20 years. But Stacey is 1000% my person. She calls me out. She lifts me up. We talk in some way, shape or form every single day and when we don't-- it's noticed. We get together at least once a month and everytime it happens, I leave fueled and more myself. Also we gorged ourselves on tamales and elote, paired with amazing hard cider. SUCH a win.
6. Finished knitting a pair of socks. I just love when I make myself socks.
7. So happy for the Comfortable Words returning!
8. I have discovered my fall 2020 quick purchase is buying more guided journals/devotionals. I have bought ....3 in the past month? So once I am done with 100 Days of Brave I will start Take Back Your Life https://www.takebackbook.com/ and then I will do The Between Places
Gah. What a week. I listened to Beth Silvers' Nightly Nuance about being tired and overburdened, and it resonated with me so much. I sent it to my husband and my bff, telling them how much it impacted me. My husband was great - he wanted to hear from me rather than some random (to him) lady on the internet, and he was thoughtful and engaged. My friend, however, threw me for a loop. "I hate politics, I hate being categorized, why can't people just do what God calls them to each day and stop being so judgy", etc. It was a gut punch, tbh. I cried a lot. All the overwhelming things jumped on board, and while some sleep and laying off the martinis has helped, it's all still weighing really heavily on me. I haven't seen her since December, and I'm going out to visit her TOMORROW, so the timing is stressful too. And! We're both PMSing. Which, I would like to point out, amplifies my emotions, but doesn't explain them away. Also, I'm an Enneagram 9.
My 10-year-old son has only turned in 10% of his literacy homework since school started, because "it's boring". And because it's challenging - he's used to achieving mastery over something on the first try, which isn't happening for him. He hasn't been attending the (online) class, either. I've got a phone call with his teacher today, and ongoing "We can do hard things" conversations with the kid.
I'm currently procrastinating, but that's the story of my life. Tonight I may get a little time with a friend, and I am alternately super excited and aggressively "meh" about it. This has been a hard friendship year for me (even pre-pandemic), and I feel like I've lost the ability to friend. Anyway... here is an IG account with some mesmerizing dance videos:
Also I randomly put on a John Mayer station on Amazon Music the other day and it was incredible. A trip back to college and music I haven't thought about in years.
Erin, first off, thank you for this month's Faith Adjacent. It had me cracking up about musical toots on the way home from church, soberly nodding while making lunch, clapping and Amening in walmart, and shouting in my car. Its encouraged me to dig deeper on some uncomfy things and thats good and growth. I've had Devi and Jess's podcast in my ears for the rest of the week (and will be hitting play again as soon as I'm done here.) Though I never was handed The Bride Wore White, or signed a pledge card, or actually even had to endure youth group sex talks (cause parents pulled me out) the culture was so pervasive in what it was saying implicitly that up untill 7 months ago I was scared to hug a boy (middle school admonitions from parents ringing in my ears) So that now that I'm almost 30 and in a serious relationship for the first time ever I'm just like "whats a healthy, God-honoring way to BE here?" anywhoo. Thank you.
Treasuresssssss
- The Boy's best friend from college is in town this week and I get to meet him tonight!!! (I'm under strict instructions not to fall in love with him, oh brother....)
- My sister and I had a celebrate fall night last sunday and made Apple Mimosas with honey and cinnamon sugar rimmed glasses and Apple Fritter Cake and just let me say that was the most NEEDED girls night.
-If I could just snap shot all the moments that made my heart warm or fluttery or just fiercely protective of my James this week, I would... but also those are *MINE* yall I love this boy.
I don't feel like its out of turn to ask for prayer here, but I have some career transitions possibly on the horizon that would be really big for me that I would appreciate your prayers over. And over all the boy things. There's a lot in front of me that is so so good. and Im so so thankful. I just want to be sure I'm following God's leading and not just what I want for myself. ya know?
I've been a voyeur and not commenter the last few weeks (as far as my own treasures).
If I'm honest with myself, reading your stories/treasures/etc. has been a nice escape from my own reality.
Treasures:
1. Last Friday night I went to a friend's 40'th gathering. There were five of us ladies at a brewery with a park right beside it. We grabbed a picnic table, drank beer and connected for three hours on a beautiful fall evening. It was everything my soul needed.
2. I'm on the worship team on my church and while we are still recording our services and doing internet church, we are to a point where the band is getting together to pre-record all together (read: 5-6 people). Making music with my friends is a highlight of my month and I'm so grateful.
3. This thread really is a delight of my week. True story.
I don't really have any internet treasures to share. If I'm honest, I've tried to be offline more this week, b/c the week has felt heavy. I'm someone who prefers peace between my people, and I'm feeling the weight of the massive divide in our country right now. I'm hearing words like "civil war" and starting to have a massive dread of election day. I see people I love using the word pandemic in quotes, and others I love who won't let me touch them if they have gone to the dentist that day. The vast disparities and our in(ability? efficiency?) to discuss and work together for solutions feels like its ripping us apart. And I don't say lightly in regard to the ease with which workable compromises and solutions can be forged.
It's just...a lot. And at the end of the day, isn't what we all want for someone to like us just the way we are? Thank you, Fred Rogers. Thank you, Dana's Upper School Head. Thank you, Erin.
See? This is why I don't post much these days. All the deep thoughts and none of the laughs. *shrugs shoulders* Oh well. Here we are.
In other news, I want Lizzo's confidence. I've got the body, but not the confidence. Get. It. Girl!
You brought A WORD on faith adjacent this week! Thank you so much for that - it was healing. I have listened multiple times, and I'm still trying to wrap my brain around it. All the blessings to you for how you handled that topic with grace, nuance, and truth.
- The Dear Evan Hansen sound track - specifically You will be Found.
- Every Mile Mattered by Nichole Nordeman - I rediscovered this album on Sunday and have been listening all week. I am forever amazed by her songwriting. "Dear Me" helped with the reckoning I felt in my faith and beliefs years ago, and it feels just as helpful and hopeful today.
- Checklists - that's it, that's the treasure. I was already a BIG fan of checklists, but they are saving my life (and sanity) in hybrid teaching.
- Trader Joe's sunflower butter cups - As a person with an allergy to peanuts and almonds who also happens to prefer Reese's over any other candy, these are a blessing.
Turds from this week:
- Parents have started protesting and demanding five days face to face, which I get. This hybrid thing is HARD and after this is over I would never like to do it again. However, I'm not ready to have that many kids in the building when I was provided 2 masks and a bottle of sanitizer as my only defense. We're supposedly fogging every night too. I know we're all doing the best we can, but I am starting to feel really neglected even though I am supposedly a "hero". All that to say, just pray for the teachers in your life, check in on them, and give them grace. We, as teachers, talk about doing that for our students, but it feels like we're hardly getting any in return.
Sorry, I feel like that got really glum for a second - it's just been rolling around in my head all week. Thank you all for being the kind of community where I knew I could bring feeling and drop it.
1. Last week as my husband went out of town (see below), so naturally my car started acting up. Found out the AC motor was messed up. For $350 they diagnosed the problem to be....A DEAD RAT IN THE AC MOTOR. Y'all. I was NOT OKAY. Well, they tried to clean and salvage the motor but it was still making noise so I had to take it back with my Father-in-Law who insisted they fix it without recharging labor because we were not aware they thought that noise was "okay"...at $700, I think I was aiding and abetting the most expensive rat this side of the Mississippi. Not what I'd choose to spend that money on, but the car is fixed and a rat-free zone (I hope he had no friends), so I'll take it!
2. My husband is in the mountains of Colorado for 13 days without cell phone reception leaving me alone with a 3yo that decided to stop sleeping at night! I can't wait until he returns to learn that he is on overnight duty! (Who wants to bet the 3yo starts sleeping when that happens?)
3. (cue BIG NERVOUS energy) The IUI worked! I haven't told many souls because of my history of miscarriage, so I'm currently a giant bag of nausea and nervous energy. Thoughts and prayers for peace and a healthy babe are SO SO encouraged. Congrats to you all, you know before most of my family and friends! LOL (I did get to tell my husband through a quick spotty facetime call, so at least the father now knows!)
Other than that (HA!), nothing much is going on...except I feel like I am on the verge of an impending mom meltdown...which is why a small girls weekend in Branson today is my personal salvation. I'm just hoping to eat, read, and take lots of naps. :)
TikTok Treasures for the last few weeks (they've either made me laugh or cry uncontrollably--there is no in between anymore.)
EDIT: As I was writing this in the office at my computer I heard a wet noise...like water hitting the concrete floor. What did I find in my living room? My potty-trained 3 year old urinating in the house like an animal. RIGHT NEXT TO THE BATHROOM. When asked why he did that, he did a great job diverting my attention:
Peeing Person: "Autumn did it once."
Mad Mama: "but she is a dog and you are not!"
Peeing Person: "Nope, I a little boy who pees in the house."
Mad Mama: JESUS TAKE THE WHEEL.
T-Minus 5 hours until girl's weekend. Will I make it?
Dan Levy in “The Great Canadian Bake-Off” is magical. We have two seasons befor the Americans find Schitt’s Creek and he is too famous. Fun fact, Schott’s Creek started on the Canadian version of PBS (it’s called CBC). It also gave you Heartland.
Hello friends, everything going on in the world has me feeling so weary and frankly scared about the future. This week, I feel like I’ve just been in survival mode and retreating into the basics of self-care to avoid complete overwhelm and shut-down. Here’s what’s been helping:
- Ben and Jerry’s Glampfire Trail Mix ice cream (I think it’s a Target exclusive)
Sigh. I feel like I come here and I’m a downer but honestly things are hard right now. It’s been a soul weary week not just with personal thing but with RGB’s death and the Breonna Taylor news.
I really just wanted to ask if you would pray for my Mom and Aunt Sharon and her family. My aunt was diagnosed with brain cancer last week and the prognosis is not good. She has been with her since two days after the diagnosis (she lives in South GA we live in the North) and my mom is not handling it well. When she is with her she is strong but when she goes back to her house for the night she is not handling it well and I’m not sure how things will be in the coming weeks as she deteriorates. They are extremely close. My mom also feels torn because my brother and I both have medical issues going on and she feels the need to be here too.
Our heart are heavy but we are clinging to hope.
I did send my 10 year old niece, Toccoa, some masks with a soccer ball on them from Etsy and she called to let me know they were the best mask ever and so soft and comfortable. So you know. I apparently am a good mask buyer. 🤷🏻♀️
Oh and hello duh best thing my partner and I celebrated 7 years of marriage Monday. His mom bought us take out from Texas Roadhouse which I had been wanting so much (I miss restaurants y’all!) and we just hung out and talked about all the amazing things we have done in 7 years. And we talked about our furbaby a lot. We think hers the cutest. 🤣
Erin you share gold with the gifs and cuteness. I must get back on the Shitts Creek train. We were watching it early in quarantine but the first season is a little tough. I’ve been told get through it and it really starts to hit its stride. It is funny as heck though.
I love forward to reading your treasures and all the beauty in your lives. 💜💜
Ok, children dressed up as the Rose family is now my favorite. 😍
I've spent the week under a blanket watching Netflix. I'm so sick of being sick but at least Derry Girls and Queer Eye were great company. Thanks for your recs last week! I also loved getting to watch The Great British Bake Off again and Matt Lucas describing different types of cake is my kind of ASMR...
Gotta add my kudos (please read that in Sophie Hudson’s voice) on the faith adjacent this week. And the please advise. Both Podcasts were major highlights of my week. And that last video. Mr. Rogers. Made me cry. We had a good week but I am plagued with girl time cramps that are taking me down for some weird reason and that little push was all I needed to full on cry. So thank you. (#notsarcasticfont) 😘
Erin! Comfortable Together is like your birthday gift to me for scheduling it in that timeframe. So excited to participate and connect over that. Bookmarking those articles, especially the habits ones, to really pore over. We’ve been talking about the Faith Adjacent on a few corners of the internet, and getting introduced to Devi was the comfort and truth I didn’t know I so desperately needed. Went to listen to Where Do We Go From Here eps on singleness, and they were a balm to my soul. Can’t wait to listen to the rest!
Big treasures this week include catching up with some friends on the phone, false Florida fall, and being friends with the person who started the “vote him out” chant that has gone viral from the President visiting the Capitol to pay respects. Take that as a symbol of bravery, speak up, it can galvanize so many.
This D.L. Mayfield piece was so helpful to me - https://religionnews.com/2020/09/23/how-a-sean-feucht-worship-service-convinced-me-i-am-no-longer-an-evangelical/ . I agree with so much of her stance and am sickened at the hypocrisy. My church is meeting after weeks of virtual church services, but masks are required, physical distancing outlined and requested, and live streaming of the service. I am really having a hard time reconciling people who want to have church without masks but are yelling about BLM protests.
For those who love High School Musical, rock, and seeing 30 Rock B cast in other projects, may I suggest Julie and the Phantoms on Netflix. It is Kenny Ortega with an unlimited budget, and BOY do I love it. It has rock stars, jazz club numbers, soulful piano, the works! The beginning of episode 4 is a classic “sing and dance the halls of school dream montage”. Enjoy!!
I also live for Demi Adejuyigbe’s September 21 videos, and this year’s was as wonderful as expected - https://youtu.be/_zzEDrYTkkg
I went AND survived my Wassie’s funeral. It was heart breaking to see my Pappy ( we are a family full of weird nicknames) aka Uncle Allen so broken over the loss of his beloved. They had been together since their early teen years, married at 17 and 19, just celebrated their 54th anniversary. I’m genuinely concerned about what he will eat as I’ve never even seen him make toast. But his daughter I’m sure will take care of him. It was balm for my soul to see some family I hadn’t seen in such a long time. To be in there company and hug them, cry and laugh was jus so good.
Right before I left town we retired our 15 passenger van. It was my everyday ride and I had been driving some form of a 15 passenger van for the last 10 years. It was amazing but we are hauling less kids and I was able to downsize to a large suv. Y’all it’s so fancy! It answers the phone for me! I don’t want it to do that but I cannot figure out how to turn it off!!
We are feeling very desperate for a break and reset over here at Spatz mansion. We are trying to plan a trip during Halloween to the mountains. I love all the candy and fun of Halloween but it’s just so much. I’ve been know to give my kids a choice between costumes and trick or treating OR $20 each to spend in our local candy store. More often than not they pick candy store.
I started my new writing gig and my first two columns seemed to be hits so that was lovely.
If you are on the fence about doing the comfortable words, let me just say that I did the study last year pre- dumpster fire 2020 and it was such a lovely gift. Your heart, soul and mental health will benefit from this study. If money is a factor please DM me and I’ll do what I can to get you the study.
Happy Friday, everyone. My oldest told me on Monday afternoon, our co-op day "Mom, it feels like we went to co-op YESTERDAY," and the week continued to draaaaaag like that. But, there were some bright spots:
1. My eldest picked key lime pie for his family birthday celebration and my MIL made the best one I have ever tasted. Key Lime Pie is one of my favorites, and I will now be requesting this goodness from her for my family birthday celebrations forever and ever, amen.
2. I've been reading a lot this week, and one of the books I read, Rome of Fall by Chad Alan Gibbs, was super nostalgic and filled with 90s music references. This has caused me to fall down the Spotify playlist making rabbit hole, and remember some really good music I had forgotten about.
3. Also reading Kill the Spider by Carlos Whittaker and gah. I feel like someone finally understands my brain.
4. Faith Adjacent continues to be one of my favorite new additions to The Bible Binge, Erin. Thanks for creating such great content to listen to.
That's it for this week. Here's hoping your weekend is filled with more treasures than turds!
First of all- I had no idea that the Great Canadian Baking Show existed, but is my google search correct? Are the first two seasons actually on Netflix?! If so, that’s jumping WAY up on my to-watch list.
Is anyone else watching Alone? My husband and I just finished season 2 and we are HOOKED. When we watch Survivor, my husband’s complaint is always that they don’t actually do much Surviving anymore, so the threat of starvation or animal attacks in Alone fills that need for him.
My biggest treasure this week is that we booked an evening away at a fancy inn for our 8th anniversary next month. Because our kids are young and only 7 months apart, our pool of babysitters is really small at this stage, and I am just abundantly thankful that my in-laws were so willing to let us get away for a weekend together.
Good Morning! Nothing terrible this week, but nothing super great. Just kind of coasting along. I am exhausted though. I feel like I finally hit the wall after being on edge since March. In February my grandmother got very sick. It was unexpected but not. She had a genetic condition that caused the muscles in her throat to stop working, so she could no longer swallow. She passed away March 3. I feel fortunate that we were able to go home for the funeral because if it had been one week later, we would not have gone. It has been one long fraught, stressful edge since then and now that things have slowed at work I've had time to go slower and the exhaustion has just crept in. Or, I just have 10 minutes to recognize it.
I know it’s pricey, but I’m loving the Olive and June Advent preorder. My daughter will ❤️ it!
https://oliveandjune.com/products/advent-calendar
This newsletter is seriously such a bright spot in my week. I signed up for The Comfortable Words the SECOND I read the email last night... very excited for this. We haven't been back to our church since pre-COVID (they started in-person services in May... side-eye), and I'll be honest, I've not kept up with all of the online things and was starting to fill a bit lost.
Quick run-down here...
Treasures:
1. The Faith Adjacent Podcast on Purity Culture that our dear Erin hosted. I was yelling "that'll preach!" while scrubbing bathroom toilets today. So good. So many great thoughts to ruminate on. I read "Pure" earlier this year and it really got me thinking of how that whole culture really effed us up. Wanting to do better with my boys.
2. The Needtobreathe album (Out of Body) that was recommended here a few weeks ago is a DELIGHT! Every song is truly wonderful.
Are we still doing turds? If so...
My major one is my youngest son and his (lack of) speech. He is over 2.5 now, and speech is still preeeeetty unclear. He jabbers constantly, but I understand about 5% of it. We have had his hearing checked (fine), evaluated for a cognitive delay (twice! passed everything with flying colors!), he's in school with other kids, we read to him, let him engage in free play, he was breastfed until 2 (really reaching here... lol)... I'm outta ideas, y'all. I have people saying "oh, just give it time! he'll develop" and others like "this is a concern..." but no other ideas. He is a bright, fun, happy baby... just, not speaking. I won't lie that I've convinced myself of some of the worst possible reasons (a brain tumor, how about those times he fell as a baby?, some crazy unknown thing we don't even know yet!) Anyway - positive thoughts that we can figure out a path to take are appreciated!
I'm not usually one to post here but today has been a long day of reflecting so what's one more opportunity.
Treasures
* This week was entirely off of grad school and I spent most of hanging out with my niece and my sister, reading People magazines that have been stacking up over the six week course, cleaning my room and taking long walks.
*My nephew turned 14 last week. He started having auntie sleepovers with my sister and me probably 8 years ago. We had one last night. He's a teenager and he still wants to hang out with us. We order pizza and show him a movie we watched when we were his age. We watched the seminal '93 favorite, 3 Ninjas. Please comment if you remember this gem. I love that kid to his core and love auntie sleepover. His five year old sister has her own version of auntie sleepover now too.
*My rotating Sunday off of church is this weekend and I am going to go back to my home church. I've been interning at my (I don't know what to call it now, they both feel like home) for almost a year and have only been back to my home church twice. I can't wait to meet in person with my other church family.
*Also my friends that I usually go to the county fair are going to recreate the fair, deep fried oreos and all, this Sunday. Send me all your fair food at home recipes.
*I think I shared a Brett Elderedge video last time but he covers a Billie Eilish song, it's lovely, he's lovely, that is all.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9TdWon0B-wM&ab_channel=BrettEldredge
Turds
* I dropped my laptop for the last time and it finally shattered the screen, not too much because I am currently using that laptop right now to write this but enough to know that tiny shards of glass are constantly leaching into my mother board and I live on borrowed time. Thankfully, my budget allows for a replacement that is coming on Monday. I had never realized that the adult decision making of purchasing a computer is paralleled by purchasing a vehicle or a home. I don't know what kind of RAM I need, I don't what an internal processor does...well now I do. Another silver lining to the turd is that I had a whole week off of school to take care of it.
Hi, friends!
It's been a ...week. Also month. My chronic health (both physical and mental) symptoms have kicked it up a notch and I haven't sorted out answers yet. Going for a follow up with my GP on Monday. I'm not super expectant, but I'll take what I can get at this point. I've been extra emotional dealing with my grandfather's declining health, a fight with my little sister, and RBG's passing but I'm trying to treat myself with the gentleness I would offer to friends.
A few treasures from my week:
- My sweet co-worker/bff gifted me a new mug with a Nightmare Before Chirstmas design. Two of my favorite things are halloween and coffee.
-I made Kendra's magical pancakes for the first time for dinner last night (with chocolate chips) and it's weirdly the one meal that didn't immediately trigger IBS symptoms. I have to figure out how to replace all my go to meals with gluten free, dairy free versions so this is the first recipe I'll try to do that with. (I am not excited about the increase in my already impossibly tight grocery budget).
-I have finally collected and submitted all requirements for my grad school application (Masters in Library Science) and now I just cross my fingers and wait.
-We agreed to keep my sister's cat while she temporarily lived with a friend and it has drastically improved my daily life to have a pet in the house. I'm currently trying to convince how fun it would be to have a kitten also. (100% will name it Arron Purr, Sir and probably just call it Sir and will giggle every time).
that's all for now - I am eternally grateful that it's Friday and for this community.
xoxo
I wish I could read this whoooole thread, but I really just need everyone to see this! https://people.com/human-interest/89-year-old-pizza-delivery-man-who-went-viral-on-tiktok-crowdfunded-12k-tip/
Hello sweet friends!
Once again, this group is balm for my soul!
A few treasures:
*Last weekend, my husband and I went to Lake Michigan with the family I nanny for and it was a DELIGHT. It was freezing but don’t you worry... I had all the cardigans and pashminas to look like a middle aged widow from every Nicholas Sparks book/movie ever! 😉 A rustic cottage with only the basics, great food and wine, and a private beach so we didn’t have to wear our masks for a little while. It was incredibly refreshing.
*This was a few weeks ago but I’m obsessed with this talking cat 😹 When he hits the “no” button consistently, it is such a mood and I’m here for it.
https://www.google.com/amp/s/people.com/pets/steve-cat-talking-buttons/%3famp=true
*My Enneagram 2w3 heart got to save the day yesterday for a friend with 4 sick little kiddos at home. She told me she loved me and I cried in my van the whole way home. Ha. I miss my friends.. it’s hard to be the only friend, childless (not by choice), and have felt very alone and forgotten in this covid season. Clearly, I know that having kids of any age can be a dumpster fire in this season is so impossibly hard.. I don’t want to diminish that. I’m just so thankful I got to see her even for a brief moment and help her out. I felt seen and loved for the first time since March.
Half turd/half treasure:
* I blew a tire on my van today right before I turned into my nanny kiddo’s preschool. But, my sweet husband came to fix the tire and my nanny dad left work and brought Chick-Fil-A for all of us! Another lady got a flat a few minutes later after me and she called AAA (while we both were waiting) and said she knew 0 men to call and that broke my heart. It made me be even more thankful in the moment and we offered to help but AAA arrived before my husband was done with my tire. I realized my privilege as well.
Beauty instead of ashes. Treasures out of turds.
Alright.
Hi.
My week’s turd-tone was set on Monday when a friend asked me why I wasn’t engaging much with church. And I cried, because there’s many reasons I’m not engaging - from grief about losing my job in ministry late last year (yay budget issues...), and missing the team, and missing the diverse lil family my old church was, to the big church energy of this new one that leaves me feeling disconnected and like I don’t fit into the system because I’m 31 and don’t have a baby so they can’t put me in the young adults group but also not in the mums group. So. She asked this in the middle of a walk by the harbour and I cried for the remaining 3km, all the way around a lighthouse, past the people on rollerblades, and avoided eye contact with the puppies that went by because they didn’t need to see my sadness.
And honestly, the turd-tone never went away.
But. Here’s some internet treasures:
- Adamsandler Hamilton. Thanks, reddit.
https://www.google.com.au/amp/s/amp.reddit.com/r/hamiltonmusical/comments/5m6pu2/adamsandler_hamilton/
- Cheese Boats. I saw them on someone’s insta and wanted one. This recipe was the winner.
https://www.31daily.com/ooey-gooey-cheese-boat-youll-love/
- I’m late to this party but I needed a friend to chat through church sads with and Sarah Bessey became that when I started Jesus Feminist yesterday. You think she’d drink tea with me?
Just dropping in to say a quick hi to you all 👋
A combination of the following has kept me from most internet things this week: an almost-1-year-old who is fighting naps RULL HARD, a 3-year-old who is waking up hungry in the middle of the night more often than not, an increasing client load at work (a blessing, but also feeling the burden of their pain and heartaches), and then you know, the world??? Sigh.
I will say, I pre-ordered Trillia Newbell's new book "Creative God, Colorful Us" coming out in 2021 (https://www.christianbook.com/creative-god-colorful-us/9780802424181/pd/424181#CBD-PD-Publisher-Description). It's geared toward 6-11 year old kids, and mine aren't quite there yet, but they will be before I know it.
Love to you all. Happy Fall. Also, can I just say the Pumpkin Cream Cold Brew is VERY MUCH SO better than the PSL? Is this a spicy take? Anyway, it's my fave Starbucks drink ever, and if you haven't had it yet, go forth ye Swipes & try it this weekend. ❤️🍁
Hey friends! Enjoying my Friday working-in-the-office treat of Starbucks Nitro Coldbrew and looking forward to a slow afternoon in higher ed.
- I told everyone Facebook I was voting for Joe Biden and got 0 hateful comments! That was super encouraging. I think it helped a lot that I explained that I still care about unborn children, but I will be voting for Biden through a post written by Elizabeth Baker. Here's her post on insta - https://www.instagram.com/p/CFYMBq8p8uL/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link - and Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/elizabethbakerwrites/posts/743210289859274 - if you want to use it, too.
- I listened to Dax Shepard's personal update on his sobriety on Armchair Expert over lunch, and it was vulnerable, brave, and moving.
- Jon Foreman's (of Switchfoot) solo song Instead of a Show has been playing in my head all week: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UihssQZoUd4
Ruth Graham's tweet also applies to aunts. Yesterday my six-year-old niece kept asking me to come outside and watch her skate and draw. Later she turned into a demon spawn that I had to wrestle out of skates and clothes and into a leotard for gymnastics. After a 10 minute nap on the way to class, she returned to her sweet self and begged me to stay and watch. I got to see her do her first aerial on the floor and she ran over twice to hug me. Cue the tears and exploding heart.
I missed the comments last week, but I'm looking forward to digging into them with a glass of wine tonight!
Turns out starting a career in school social work remotely in the middle of a pandemic is a TAD stressful. I gave myself a 3-day-long migraine last week (hence, missing the Lil Swipes comments).
BUT I got my first paycheck today and I'm going to Whole Foods tonight because I'm a grown woman and I deserve boujee groceries. I'm getting the ingredients to make the roast chicken Flo Pugh made on her insta stories last week (iykyk). I'm SO excited for it. I'm going to do the chicken, roasted veggies, gravy, sweet spaghetti (family recipe, I grew up eating it), and homemade biscuits. Yes, it's for just me, and I will have leftovers FO DAYS, but I'm so excited to kick off sabbath with this feast.
My church small group met last weekend in person house church style and it warmed my heart in every way possible. For back story: I was a part of a network of house churches here in Chicago for the last 3ish years and they shut down towards the end of last year. My specific location shut down just before the world went up in flames, so I've spent all of quarantine church homeless. It's been rough, but I'm in a community group at this new-to-me church with a family who used to host one of the house churches in the network and they volunteered their home last weekend to do service house church style. I lead worship, we streamed the sermon, and then spent a good hour and a half fellowshipping afterwards. It was all socially distanced and v safe, but it was just SO nice to be with other believers in person again and the fact that we did it house church style made it all the better.
Also, I cut off all of my hair last night (okay, not ALL of my hair, but it's definitely quite the change) and I'm feeling like a new woman. I'm donating 13 inches to Children With Hair Loss and saving a BOAT LOAD of dollas on conditioner. After 6 years of living in Chicago, I FINALLY found a stylist I like and who knows what's up when cutting curly hair. I gave her alllllll of my dollars.
And that video mocking the Social Dilemma KILLED ME DEAD. It's too accurate.
Oof. I haven’t posted in a couple weeks because I have been unhealthy fiving. So this week, I leaned in hard on spending time with my kids and husband and all of that, posting on social media again etc. Then yesterday I got in an argument with an uncle who said to me “I guess your feelings matter more than FACTS,” and I had a breakdown. Look, I am a FIVE. I have ALL THE FEELINGS but you’d better believe I come for the facts. I struggle to remember that feelings aren’t unimportant and misleading but sometimes completely appropriate already.
Anyway, the treasure of this turd was that it led to a good conversation with my cousin (who assured me that aside from her dad, our extended family is avoiding political conversations like the...well, they’re avoiding them) and my mom. My mom and I have been growing apart over the past few years. She now lives overseas as an m word I can’t say on the internet and with me having to make myself adult without her as well as going through some deconstruction of my faith, we aren’t as close as we used to be. So being able to share those feelings of isolation and otherness with her despite our different views was a balm.
The other hard thing from yesterday was that my six year old daughter has gotten very curious about divorce. My husband and I have assured her that we love each other and aren’t divorcing, but this led to a lot of questions about my parents’ divorce (which happened when I was her age) and that was hard. I’ve dealt with most of those feelings about my dad, but it comes back up sometimes. I didn’t include the stuff I didn’t think she could handle—he was a high school teacher who left us for a student—but it’s still hard to try to explain in a way to a six year old that someone we love can do terrible, crappy things.
Anyway, this week has not been sunshine and roses, but I’m thankful for the probably false fall we are having in SC, as well as long-distance and internet friendships. They’re the things saving my life right now. Also thankful for cross stitch, which I’m learning to do. It keeps me from some of the scrolling and it’s cathartic to stab something repeatedly and come out with something pretty.
This was a weird week for me. It sounds like I’m in good company. Here’s my mix of turds and treasures.
(1) Depression and anxiety are hard. They don’t give any warning and they increase the heaviness of a thousandfold. I tell people that on my bad days, it’s like running through Jello. I had a couple days this week where I was pretty much useless. And then I feel bad about getting nothing done. It’s a bad cycle. Today feels better. One day at a time, I guess.
(2) On Fridays I do a FaceTime crossword puzzle with my mom. It’s delightful. We had a hard relationship for a really long time. Most of my life. It’s just been this year (largely because of the Enneagram) that I’ve been able to understand her in a way that makes me appreciate her and not feel angry all the time. My parents are in their 70s, so I figure I’m going to create as many good memories as I can to balance out the difficult years.
(3) I’ve been having a hard time with my church lately. I feel disconnected and “going” (online) doesn’t make me feel better. My husband did a really wonderful job of talking me through those feelings last night and while I still feel frustrated, it feels manageable. My husband isn’t a Christian, but he does an amazing job of meeting me where I’m at and helping me make sense of my faith and my feelings.
This feels like word vomit, but it’s time for the crossword. I appreciate that this community does the opposite of my church—makes me feel connected. Happy weekend, everyone!
Erin,
You did some preaching in the Faith Adjacent, and I like it!
I was reflecting on the purity culture movement and the thought struck me, it wasn't just in our sexuality, but we were expected to remain pure in many ways. Dont listen to that music or PUT ANYTHING INTO OUR MINDS THAT ISNT EDIFYING side hugs only, Harry Potter is out, but LOTR is fine because he was a christian EVEN THOUGH THERE WAS MAGIC AND WIZARDS IN BOTH (my theory: wizards were ok in LOTR bc misogyny, witches are clearly not ok because they are evil. and female.) gah! It was intense. so many rules.
Sorry, obviously that brought out lots of feelings! :)
We are still in the US and waiting to get back to France. Some days this week were harder to hold out hope. Also its been intense around here. Im living in Louisville at the moment, and lots of people have opinions and lots are grieving. It's heartbreaking. Thankfully the churches that I have heard from are trying to listen. So that is good.
My treasures:
This week in our family bible study, we were evaluating the character trait of patience. The tagline: We choose to be patient even when we feel like getting our own way. This speaks to me right now, and honestly my inner toddler wants to throw hissy fits and demand my way. If my kids can do it, I can too.
Blackberry sparkling water/sodas... who knew blackberries were so sweet?!?
VO5 conditioner... is this allowed? Something from my past that is delighting me now? well, it reminds me of the smell of my mother from when I was a child, and I find it oddly comforting, like a middle aged woman smell blanket. Also, its conditions my hair really well. I used to have flat hair but aging has changed things, including the texture of my hair?!? so I've been experimenting.
and lastly... embracing that PSL life!!! Give me all the fall, all the colors, the cool temps (sorry Deep South folks!), and cozy blankets. I need some cozy overdosy therapy right now.
I love this little internet community so much! It’s such a joy to know this is going to be in my inbox on Friday mornings.
I am on the waiting list at my library for Jack by Marilynne Robinson but this article I read this morning only amplified my desire to read it. https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2020/10/05/marilynne-robinsons-essential-american-stories
I’m also listening to Sufjan’s new album today (he is one of my top 10 fave musicians)
Also, Erin, I showed my mom Hamilton for the first time this week. She clapped after every song and at the end she goes, “wow! That was amazing! But I did not know there was so much rapping in it.” 😂😂🙄
Watch this and I dare you not to cry!!!!
https://wnyt.com/news/elderly-utah-pizza-man-gets-12000-dollars-from-tiktok-fans/5872273/#:~:text=The%20Valdezes%20say%20it's%20because,Newey%20a%20big%20delivery%20tip.
How's about that Harry Styles gif at the end... Bless us all. If you listened to this week's Popcast episode... you know I am conflicted by a simultaneous love of Harry Styles and a fear of literally everything else. So this 1950s psychological thriller is really throwing me for a loop. My current plan is to read the entire script of the movie before going to see it. So that there are no surprises. Also- I may actually take the advice and watch Get Out. But yall... I'm scared. A common quote in my house is "three spooky five me" because it's like "two spooky for me" taken up one notch. Get Out sounds three spooky. It's really causing some inner turmoil.
A Week of Unlikely Victories: A Short Story
I have finally come around to the idea of hacking your crying. I’m more of a bury-it-deep-inside-until-it-dissolves kind of Feelings feeler, but I made the wonderful mistake of turning on Call the Midwife. It restarted in some seasons I’ve already seen, and I just planted myself in front of that TV and cried over all those babies, and Sister Evangeline, and Mary Cynthia, and Susan Mullucks all over again. And the next day was a little brighter. #latetothepartybutgladtobeherethanksforhavingme
And listen. I’m just so terrible at painting my nails. I must be the prime demographic for Olive & June though, because it seems my entire online life has been sponsored by their ads lately...and I’ve heard nothing but good reviews…but like, I’m just really bad at nails, you guys! I decided that I needed a treat/project last weekend that could be accomplished and bought the Poppy from Target to try it out.
Y’all. I meeeeeeaaaannnnnnn!
My nails are still painted! And it doesn’t look like I did it blindfolded! So now my phone is filled with screenshots of colors that I want to get and try out. If you need me, I’ll be Adding to Cart all the pretty colors I think I can pull off, and maybe a few that I would never have considered before, and crying about pretend babies, and sprinkling in GBBO as much as I can get away with this weekend!
Narrator: She learned the value of listening to her online friends that week. And she was better off because of it.
The End
Didn't realize I needed Mr. Rogers to be my cheerleader this morning, but I definitely do!
So looking forward to going through the Comforting Words with this group! I've been pretty adverse to bible study type things for awhile, but this is a such a supportive, non-judgmental group.
Not sure if this is a treasure or turd, but this Hogwarts virtual school spoof was a little too close to home with my middle schooler's experience: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B18ss3dbRAI
Finally I've been listening to the audio book The Happy Ever After Playlist by Abby Jimenez and it is such a sweet (and a little spicy!) love story and the accompanying Spotify playlist is a very fun companion. https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1tsC0rNPk4Q4lymo4ek83S?si=sgL4YukdTjak64elsBmdXQ
It's been a rough week dealing with our health care sharing "ministry" in order to try to get my sinus surgery covered. Every time I'm on the phone with them, they ask if they can pray for me, and every time I just want to say, "Nah, I'm good on the prayer...I'd rather you just pay my medical bills." Ugh. I'm not bitter. It's fine.
I knew I was in an unhealthy place emotionally when I started getting in arguments with strangers on social media (a very NOT enneagram 9 thing to do). I'm so thankful for a good friend who asked me hard questions about how much time I was spending on social media, reading the news, and engaging in other life-giving activities vs. intake of depressing news and hot takes on social media. I reestablished the screen time limits on my phone and decided to take Saturdays as a Sabbath from social media. Thankful for a friend who can see me spiraling and ask hard questions without judgment.
Good morning, all! I’m going to ignore all the turds going on in the world for the sake of this thread.
-This is half turd/half treasure, but my Oma went to the ER last weekend with crazy high BP (something like 240/160) and ended up having to stay a few days and get a pacemaker put in. Oma is really the only grandparent who has been a big part of my life since the others died in my early childhood, and I refuse to face the fact that she’s 85 and her health is declining, so this was not and easy thing for me to hear. I’m going to visit her this weekend as she’s recovering from surgery to help her out as much as she’ll let me (if people want to know where I get my quiet stubbornness and independence from, they need only look to my mom and Oma), and I’m bringing The Boy with me so she can meet him. I’m focusing on the positive that I get to see her and have her meet Michael, and I’m praying she lives many more years, gets to be at my wedding potentially in the near-ish future, and is in good health.
-This meme: https://www.instagram.com/p/CFfrQYkF_6D/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link
-I’m not a crazy fall person, but I am very much enjoying the cooler weather this week and feeling like I can go with either hot or iced coffee right now. This is just the fall tease, and the hotter weather will return next week for a week or two, but I’m enjoying it for now.
-Schitt’s Creek. I know I’m late to this train, but this show is a delight. All of the characters really annoyed me at first and I wasn’t sure I’d get into it, but after about half a season, I was hooked. Those costumes on the little children is perfection.
Alright, that’s all I’ve got. My Fridays are endlessly boring at work, so I really enjoy going through all the links in this thread to keep me occupied when needed!
Hello Friends! So happy to see?/talk?/type? with y'all!
Erin Super Girl and the Schitt's Creek Kids were high on my treasure list this week. Excited to see both in the list!
Perhaps my biggest treasure this week is my husband. Without being asked he picked up more feminine products for favorite first born, gave them to her and told her "that he might not always have the answers, and may have to defer to your mom, but I am always here if you have questions or need anything. I will go to the store for whatever you need and any man that loves you should not have a problem getting you what you need" Y'ALL!!!! BonusDadWin As weird as it sounds I swear I fell more in love with him at that moment!
Other Misc Wonders:
Ludacris rapping "Llama Llama Red Pajama"
https://www.facebook.com/157687092983/posts/10157932536622984/?vh=e&extid=RU0A3RUhqMF8EHoR
Mesmerized by this Miniature Art by artist Tanaka Tatsuya.
https://www.facebook.com/229656423861748/posts/1539055896255121/?extid=pLFoN8WwTDVaOHFO&d=n
More amazing creative things! Book sculptures.
https://www.facebook.com/183689198352081/posts/3207940675926903/?extid=tck38BzrHr5zZXgp&d=n
Some other treasury things in the work, but not quite ready to share. I'll keep y'all posted!
Good morning, internet friends!!! Long time no post. It has been A week, has it not? I’m going to focus on the good things this week:
I’m legit obsessed with The Home Edit and the new Get Organized series on Netflix. I’m pretty organized but they take it to a whole other level! Also, I really want to hang out with Clea and Joanna.
We watched the OG Karate Kid with my oldest son (10.5). Love it so much! We have not watched Cobra Kai yet but can’t wait!
Some of you may recall my house buying dilemma where my parents were gifting us money as a down payment but my husband wanted to use that for college for our boys. Well, thanks to a good long conversation with his mom, he and I are now both on the same page! Praise the Lord and pass the moving boxes!! Hopefully after the first of the year, we will have a new home and my kids can stop using my bedroom as their playroom! 😆
Hi, everyone! I'm usually just a reader and a "liker" in this space but today I decided to stretch outside my introvert bubble and jump into the Lil Swipe fray!
Treasures this week:
- The fireplace setting on Netflix that transforms my dimly-lit living room into a cozy fall respite (lighting all the candles and draping all hard surfaces with throw blankets helps the vibe as well).
- Tearing up while reading just the DESCRIPTION of Erin's The Comfortable Words. Gah. I'm so ready for this study.
- These jeans from Everlane that actually FIT my curvy frame and caused my roommate to say "Your butt looks so good!" https://www.everlane.com/products/womens-curvy-as-highrise-skinny-jean-darkbluewash?collection=womens-jeans
- And lastly, I have finally joined the Game of Thrones band wagon a gazillion years late so my final treasure is short-hair-scruffy-faced Jaime Lannister.
Thank you all for sharing your highs and lows and "aggressively meh" days. They are a comfort in the midst of *gestures vaguely* all this. Happy weekend, lil swipes!
Morning from Mn!
This week. Oof. From RBG to Breonna. From admissions about transfer of power after elections, to.....its a lot. It'ssssss a LOTTTTTT. I had a couple power cries. It's helped. But I wish I had more sporadic cries from something funny and absurd over rage and dismay. But now I'm posting here where good things exist.
That all being said.
Here we go with my handy and oft-updated list I kept all week.
1. People showing their good sides and making my cry for the overall hope of humanity: This is post RBG's passing. I saw so many of you posting powerful content on the Gram. I actually wept because its comforting to see who's feeling the same way I am from all over the country, world, background. It really brought me comfort because right now, feeling like an outlier for just doing what seems to be the most common sense of actions, for aligning with people who seem to genuinely want better things not just for me, but for SO MANY. Oh, I needed to see that community. I need to keep seeing it right now.
2. 4 Albino Squirrels : Okay this was actually something that happened last week but I totally spaced on mentioning it but going back to this moment brought me much joy. Danielle (fellow swiper!!) joined me on this journey of the 4 albino squirrels I saw on one outing. It was a delight.
3. Face Bracket for my mask: Annie F. Downs mentioned a similar product like this on Instragram. I found these and bought them. https://www.amazon.com/Comfortable-Silicone-Breathing-Washable-Reusable/dp/B08GY8MJZ5/ref=pd_ybh_a_20?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=32KAQ7ZWS1X1ZNYJQ990 And so I am wearing lipstick again and feel like my most powerful self again. I don't wear this when going to the grocery store, but when at work when I need my power. When I need that extra UMPH that rocking some power lip.....I wear this under my mask
4. Having a night out with my bestie Stacey --- Stacey is my OG-est of the OG people who know me. Note for the audio, she's actually --- wait for it -- my exstepcousin. My mom was married to her uncle and so my halfsiblings are her legit blood cousins. I have known Stace since I was 4 and we have maintained a grounded amazing relationship for now nearly 40 YEARS. Yes I have been married for nearly 20 years. But Stacey is 1000% my person. She calls me out. She lifts me up. We talk in some way, shape or form every single day and when we don't-- it's noticed. We get together at least once a month and everytime it happens, I leave fueled and more myself. Also we gorged ourselves on tamales and elote, paired with amazing hard cider. SUCH a win.
5. Busting out my Levenger fountain pens to use for my daily journal entries. I have one very similar to this that I bought well before I was a parent and I love using it --https://www.levenger.com/writing-8/shop-by-brand-34/levenger-275/true-writer-royal-fountain-pen-f-mb-13366.aspx
6. Finished knitting a pair of socks. I just love when I make myself socks.
7. So happy for the Comfortable Words returning!
8. I have discovered my fall 2020 quick purchase is buying more guided journals/devotionals. I have bought ....3 in the past month? So once I am done with 100 Days of Brave I will start Take Back Your Life https://www.takebackbook.com/ and then I will do The Between Places
https://www.smaywilsonshop.com/thebetweenplaces
But then I see Beth Moore has one and now Shauna Niequist will release one in April? YUP I will totally get it. https://www.amazon.com/dp/0310456835/ref=nav_timeline_asin?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1
Anyone else have one they love? Because, sure why not get another? ;)
So, another week and now I'm going to jump in and enjoy all the comments and feel so blessed I get to "know" you guys.....
Be well
Be your best (whatever that is for you)
Love to all
mel
Gah. What a week. I listened to Beth Silvers' Nightly Nuance about being tired and overburdened, and it resonated with me so much. I sent it to my husband and my bff, telling them how much it impacted me. My husband was great - he wanted to hear from me rather than some random (to him) lady on the internet, and he was thoughtful and engaged. My friend, however, threw me for a loop. "I hate politics, I hate being categorized, why can't people just do what God calls them to each day and stop being so judgy", etc. It was a gut punch, tbh. I cried a lot. All the overwhelming things jumped on board, and while some sleep and laying off the martinis has helped, it's all still weighing really heavily on me. I haven't seen her since December, and I'm going out to visit her TOMORROW, so the timing is stressful too. And! We're both PMSing. Which, I would like to point out, amplifies my emotions, but doesn't explain them away. Also, I'm an Enneagram 9.
My 10-year-old son has only turned in 10% of his literacy homework since school started, because "it's boring". And because it's challenging - he's used to achieving mastery over something on the first try, which isn't happening for him. He hasn't been attending the (online) class, either. I've got a phone call with his teacher today, and ongoing "We can do hard things" conversations with the kid.
I'm currently procrastinating, but that's the story of my life. Tonight I may get a little time with a friend, and I am alternately super excited and aggressively "meh" about it. This has been a hard friendship year for me (even pre-pandemic), and I feel like I've lost the ability to friend. Anyway... here is an IG account with some mesmerizing dance videos:
https://instagram.com/_aubreyfisher?igshid=1125jkof7mde5
Also I randomly put on a John Mayer station on Amazon Music the other day and it was incredible. A trip back to college and music I haven't thought about in years.
Love to you all!
Erin, first off, thank you for this month's Faith Adjacent. It had me cracking up about musical toots on the way home from church, soberly nodding while making lunch, clapping and Amening in walmart, and shouting in my car. Its encouraged me to dig deeper on some uncomfy things and thats good and growth. I've had Devi and Jess's podcast in my ears for the rest of the week (and will be hitting play again as soon as I'm done here.) Though I never was handed The Bride Wore White, or signed a pledge card, or actually even had to endure youth group sex talks (cause parents pulled me out) the culture was so pervasive in what it was saying implicitly that up untill 7 months ago I was scared to hug a boy (middle school admonitions from parents ringing in my ears) So that now that I'm almost 30 and in a serious relationship for the first time ever I'm just like "whats a healthy, God-honoring way to BE here?" anywhoo. Thank you.
Treasuresssssss
- The Boy's best friend from college is in town this week and I get to meet him tonight!!! (I'm under strict instructions not to fall in love with him, oh brother....)
- My sister and I had a celebrate fall night last sunday and made Apple Mimosas with honey and cinnamon sugar rimmed glasses and Apple Fritter Cake and just let me say that was the most NEEDED girls night.
-If I could just snap shot all the moments that made my heart warm or fluttery or just fiercely protective of my James this week, I would... but also those are *MINE* yall I love this boy.
I don't feel like its out of turn to ask for prayer here, but I have some career transitions possibly on the horizon that would be really big for me that I would appreciate your prayers over. And over all the boy things. There's a lot in front of me that is so so good. and Im so so thankful. I just want to be sure I'm following God's leading and not just what I want for myself. ya know?
anyhoo. love y'all. mean it.
Good morning eveyrone!
I've been a voyeur and not commenter the last few weeks (as far as my own treasures).
If I'm honest with myself, reading your stories/treasures/etc. has been a nice escape from my own reality.
Treasures:
1. Last Friday night I went to a friend's 40'th gathering. There were five of us ladies at a brewery with a park right beside it. We grabbed a picnic table, drank beer and connected for three hours on a beautiful fall evening. It was everything my soul needed.
2. I'm on the worship team on my church and while we are still recording our services and doing internet church, we are to a point where the band is getting together to pre-record all together (read: 5-6 people). Making music with my friends is a highlight of my month and I'm so grateful.
3. This thread really is a delight of my week. True story.
I don't really have any internet treasures to share. If I'm honest, I've tried to be offline more this week, b/c the week has felt heavy. I'm someone who prefers peace between my people, and I'm feeling the weight of the massive divide in our country right now. I'm hearing words like "civil war" and starting to have a massive dread of election day. I see people I love using the word pandemic in quotes, and others I love who won't let me touch them if they have gone to the dentist that day. The vast disparities and our in(ability? efficiency?) to discuss and work together for solutions feels like its ripping us apart. And I don't say lightly in regard to the ease with which workable compromises and solutions can be forged.
It's just...a lot. And at the end of the day, isn't what we all want for someone to like us just the way we are? Thank you, Fred Rogers. Thank you, Dana's Upper School Head. Thank you, Erin.
See? This is why I don't post much these days. All the deep thoughts and none of the laughs. *shrugs shoulders* Oh well. Here we are.
In other news, I want Lizzo's confidence. I've got the body, but not the confidence. Get. It. Girl!
Erin,
You brought A WORD on faith adjacent this week! Thank you so much for that - it was healing. I have listened multiple times, and I'm still trying to wrap my brain around it. All the blessings to you for how you handled that topic with grace, nuance, and truth.
Happy Friday, friends! We made it!
Weekly treasures:
- Me, listening to Hamilton on my afternoon walks: https://www.instagram.com/reel/CFCJjJwjQO3/?igshid=155zazqpnq5w9
- The Dear Evan Hansen sound track - specifically You will be Found.
- Every Mile Mattered by Nichole Nordeman - I rediscovered this album on Sunday and have been listening all week. I am forever amazed by her songwriting. "Dear Me" helped with the reckoning I felt in my faith and beliefs years ago, and it feels just as helpful and hopeful today.
- Checklists - that's it, that's the treasure. I was already a BIG fan of checklists, but they are saving my life (and sanity) in hybrid teaching.
- Trader Joe's sunflower butter cups - As a person with an allergy to peanuts and almonds who also happens to prefer Reese's over any other candy, these are a blessing.
Turds from this week:
- Parents have started protesting and demanding five days face to face, which I get. This hybrid thing is HARD and after this is over I would never like to do it again. However, I'm not ready to have that many kids in the building when I was provided 2 masks and a bottle of sanitizer as my only defense. We're supposedly fogging every night too. I know we're all doing the best we can, but I am starting to feel really neglected even though I am supposedly a "hero". All that to say, just pray for the teachers in your life, check in on them, and give them grace. We, as teachers, talk about doing that for our students, but it feels like we're hardly getting any in return.
Sorry, I feel like that got really glum for a second - it's just been rolling around in my head all week. Thank you all for being the kind of community where I knew I could bring feeling and drop it.
I can't wait to read all of your treasures!
Good Morning, Lil Swipes!
It's been a bit because...
1. Last week as my husband went out of town (see below), so naturally my car started acting up. Found out the AC motor was messed up. For $350 they diagnosed the problem to be....A DEAD RAT IN THE AC MOTOR. Y'all. I was NOT OKAY. Well, they tried to clean and salvage the motor but it was still making noise so I had to take it back with my Father-in-Law who insisted they fix it without recharging labor because we were not aware they thought that noise was "okay"...at $700, I think I was aiding and abetting the most expensive rat this side of the Mississippi. Not what I'd choose to spend that money on, but the car is fixed and a rat-free zone (I hope he had no friends), so I'll take it!
2. My husband is in the mountains of Colorado for 13 days without cell phone reception leaving me alone with a 3yo that decided to stop sleeping at night! I can't wait until he returns to learn that he is on overnight duty! (Who wants to bet the 3yo starts sleeping when that happens?)
3. (cue BIG NERVOUS energy) The IUI worked! I haven't told many souls because of my history of miscarriage, so I'm currently a giant bag of nausea and nervous energy. Thoughts and prayers for peace and a healthy babe are SO SO encouraged. Congrats to you all, you know before most of my family and friends! LOL (I did get to tell my husband through a quick spotty facetime call, so at least the father now knows!)
Other than that (HA!), nothing much is going on...except I feel like I am on the verge of an impending mom meltdown...which is why a small girls weekend in Branson today is my personal salvation. I'm just hoping to eat, read, and take lots of naps. :)
TikTok Treasures for the last few weeks (they've either made me laugh or cry uncontrollably--there is no in between anymore.)
https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJUPACkv/
https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJUPaCDe/
https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJUPDXph/
https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJUPBuCt/
https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJUPu3C5/
https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJUPHa3Y/
https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJUPyQMc/
EDIT: As I was writing this in the office at my computer I heard a wet noise...like water hitting the concrete floor. What did I find in my living room? My potty-trained 3 year old urinating in the house like an animal. RIGHT NEXT TO THE BATHROOM. When asked why he did that, he did a great job diverting my attention:
Peeing Person: "Autumn did it once."
Mad Mama: "but she is a dog and you are not!"
Peeing Person: "Nope, I a little boy who pees in the house."
Mad Mama: JESUS TAKE THE WHEEL.
T-Minus 5 hours until girl's weekend. Will I make it?
Dan Levy in “The Great Canadian Bake-Off” is magical. We have two seasons befor the Americans find Schitt’s Creek and he is too famous. Fun fact, Schott’s Creek started on the Canadian version of PBS (it’s called CBC). It also gave you Heartland.
Nope. Can’t do Mr. Rogers right now. I need to not dissolve into a puddle of tears today. That was yesterday.
Just purchased comfortable words!! Can’t wait.
Been loving the Daily podcast. Especially the RBG part 1 & II. So so good.
Social media things that made me quiet laugh with a double chin at my phone:
https://www.instagram.com/p/CFhouOGBMP8/?igshid=gqx04u66y61m
https://www.instagram.com/p/CFc6fI_pW1t/?igshid=13wa00hg90jws
https://twitter.com/dustinkcouch/status/1308935281798774784?s=21
https://twitter.com/kkdumez/status/1308195819359817729?s=21
https://twitter.com/httb_4/status/1308847475126665217?s=21
Love you LS’s.
Hello friends, everything going on in the world has me feeling so weary and frankly scared about the future. This week, I feel like I’ve just been in survival mode and retreating into the basics of self-care to avoid complete overwhelm and shut-down. Here’s what’s been helping:
- Ben and Jerry’s Glampfire Trail Mix ice cream (I think it’s a Target exclusive)
- This new Olay body wash. My skin has never been softer https://www.target.com/p/olay-premium-body-wash-vitamin-c-17-9-fl-oz/-/A-76618360
- rewatching The Mindy Project on Hulu
- ordering a 12 pack of Annie’s organic Mac and cheese from Costco on sale for $11 (I think the sale goes til Sunday for any fellow Costco members)
That’s all I have for this week. I hope both y’all’s and my weekend are uplifting in any way possible
Sigh. I feel like I come here and I’m a downer but honestly things are hard right now. It’s been a soul weary week not just with personal thing but with RGB’s death and the Breonna Taylor news.
I really just wanted to ask if you would pray for my Mom and Aunt Sharon and her family. My aunt was diagnosed with brain cancer last week and the prognosis is not good. She has been with her since two days after the diagnosis (she lives in South GA we live in the North) and my mom is not handling it well. When she is with her she is strong but when she goes back to her house for the night she is not handling it well and I’m not sure how things will be in the coming weeks as she deteriorates. They are extremely close. My mom also feels torn because my brother and I both have medical issues going on and she feels the need to be here too.
Our heart are heavy but we are clinging to hope.
I did send my 10 year old niece, Toccoa, some masks with a soccer ball on them from Etsy and she called to let me know they were the best mask ever and so soft and comfortable. So you know. I apparently am a good mask buyer. 🤷🏻♀️
Oh and hello duh best thing my partner and I celebrated 7 years of marriage Monday. His mom bought us take out from Texas Roadhouse which I had been wanting so much (I miss restaurants y’all!) and we just hung out and talked about all the amazing things we have done in 7 years. And we talked about our furbaby a lot. We think hers the cutest. 🤣
Erin you share gold with the gifs and cuteness. I must get back on the Shitts Creek train. We were watching it early in quarantine but the first season is a little tough. I’ve been told get through it and it really starts to hit its stride. It is funny as heck though.
I love forward to reading your treasures and all the beauty in your lives. 💜💜
Happy Friday!
Ok, children dressed up as the Rose family is now my favorite. 😍
I've spent the week under a blanket watching Netflix. I'm so sick of being sick but at least Derry Girls and Queer Eye were great company. Thanks for your recs last week! I also loved getting to watch The Great British Bake Off again and Matt Lucas describing different types of cake is my kind of ASMR...
This Twitter thread of Enneagram types as lyrics from Never Gonna Give You Up made me giggle. https://twitter.com/j_winn11/status/1306772434473934849
The finalists of this year's Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards have been announced. Tag yourself. I'm the faceplanting baby elephant. https://www.bbcearth.com/blog/?article=prepare-for-a-wildlife-laugh
Take care, friends!
Gotta add my kudos (please read that in Sophie Hudson’s voice) on the faith adjacent this week. And the please advise. Both Podcasts were major highlights of my week. And that last video. Mr. Rogers. Made me cry. We had a good week but I am plagued with girl time cramps that are taking me down for some weird reason and that little push was all I needed to full on cry. So thank you. (#notsarcasticfont) 😘
Erin! Comfortable Together is like your birthday gift to me for scheduling it in that timeframe. So excited to participate and connect over that. Bookmarking those articles, especially the habits ones, to really pore over. We’ve been talking about the Faith Adjacent on a few corners of the internet, and getting introduced to Devi was the comfort and truth I didn’t know I so desperately needed. Went to listen to Where Do We Go From Here eps on singleness, and they were a balm to my soul. Can’t wait to listen to the rest!
Big treasures this week include catching up with some friends on the phone, false Florida fall, and being friends with the person who started the “vote him out” chant that has gone viral from the President visiting the Capitol to pay respects. Take that as a symbol of bravery, speak up, it can galvanize so many.
This D.L. Mayfield piece was so helpful to me - https://religionnews.com/2020/09/23/how-a-sean-feucht-worship-service-convinced-me-i-am-no-longer-an-evangelical/ . I agree with so much of her stance and am sickened at the hypocrisy. My church is meeting after weeks of virtual church services, but masks are required, physical distancing outlined and requested, and live streaming of the service. I am really having a hard time reconciling people who want to have church without masks but are yelling about BLM protests.
For those who love High School Musical, rock, and seeing 30 Rock B cast in other projects, may I suggest Julie and the Phantoms on Netflix. It is Kenny Ortega with an unlimited budget, and BOY do I love it. It has rock stars, jazz club numbers, soulful piano, the works! The beginning of episode 4 is a classic “sing and dance the halls of school dream montage”. Enjoy!!
I also live for Demi Adejuyigbe’s September 21 videos, and this year’s was as wonderful as expected - https://youtu.be/_zzEDrYTkkg
(2016 - https://youtu.be/kPwG6L73-VU, 2017 - https://youtu.be/fPpUYXZb2AA, 2018 - https://youtu.be/CG7YHFT4hjw, and 2019 - https://youtu.be/_hpU6UEq8hA)
And finally, this week’s TikTok Roundup
Trader Joe’s mini tale of a mood - https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJD53oep/
Kath has really taken it to the next level in her recorder performances - https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJD5Tq92/
A little bit paw-lexis - https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJDH2h81/
I’d trust this human with my dog - https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJDqmBeL/
“Thank you for your question” - https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJDqs7V3/
This week’s WAP remix (I should be tired of these BUT I’M NOT) - https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJDqtbyw/
The tight harmonies we all pray for - https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJDb1MQ6/
If blog recipes were a conversation - https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJDbRvoK/
Followup: the cat from last week started a band: https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJDbYyen/
Hamilton in Kelly Kapoor quotes - https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJDw667f/
Amelia Bedelia, such a wacky lady - https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJUYdLdx/
Shed shanty - https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJUY1gD2/
Say no to THIS - https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJUS5FwK/
Sibling bonding time - https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJUSyJry/
Morning y’all!
I went AND survived my Wassie’s funeral. It was heart breaking to see my Pappy ( we are a family full of weird nicknames) aka Uncle Allen so broken over the loss of his beloved. They had been together since their early teen years, married at 17 and 19, just celebrated their 54th anniversary. I’m genuinely concerned about what he will eat as I’ve never even seen him make toast. But his daughter I’m sure will take care of him. It was balm for my soul to see some family I hadn’t seen in such a long time. To be in there company and hug them, cry and laugh was jus so good.
Right before I left town we retired our 15 passenger van. It was my everyday ride and I had been driving some form of a 15 passenger van for the last 10 years. It was amazing but we are hauling less kids and I was able to downsize to a large suv. Y’all it’s so fancy! It answers the phone for me! I don’t want it to do that but I cannot figure out how to turn it off!!
We are feeling very desperate for a break and reset over here at Spatz mansion. We are trying to plan a trip during Halloween to the mountains. I love all the candy and fun of Halloween but it’s just so much. I’ve been know to give my kids a choice between costumes and trick or treating OR $20 each to spend in our local candy store. More often than not they pick candy store.
I started my new writing gig and my first two columns seemed to be hits so that was lovely.
If you are on the fence about doing the comfortable words, let me just say that I did the study last year pre- dumpster fire 2020 and it was such a lovely gift. Your heart, soul and mental health will benefit from this study. If money is a factor please DM me and I’ll do what I can to get you the study.
Much love to my favorite internet gang🤎🤎
Happy Friday, everyone. My oldest told me on Monday afternoon, our co-op day "Mom, it feels like we went to co-op YESTERDAY," and the week continued to draaaaaag like that. But, there were some bright spots:
1. My eldest picked key lime pie for his family birthday celebration and my MIL made the best one I have ever tasted. Key Lime Pie is one of my favorites, and I will now be requesting this goodness from her for my family birthday celebrations forever and ever, amen.
2. I've been reading a lot this week, and one of the books I read, Rome of Fall by Chad Alan Gibbs, was super nostalgic and filled with 90s music references. This has caused me to fall down the Spotify playlist making rabbit hole, and remember some really good music I had forgotten about.
3. Also reading Kill the Spider by Carlos Whittaker and gah. I feel like someone finally understands my brain.
4. Faith Adjacent continues to be one of my favorite new additions to The Bible Binge, Erin. Thanks for creating such great content to listen to.
That's it for this week. Here's hoping your weekend is filled with more treasures than turds!
First of all- I had no idea that the Great Canadian Baking Show existed, but is my google search correct? Are the first two seasons actually on Netflix?! If so, that’s jumping WAY up on my to-watch list.
Is anyone else watching Alone? My husband and I just finished season 2 and we are HOOKED. When we watch Survivor, my husband’s complaint is always that they don’t actually do much Surviving anymore, so the threat of starvation or animal attacks in Alone fills that need for him.
My biggest treasure this week is that we booked an evening away at a fancy inn for our 8th anniversary next month. Because our kids are young and only 7 months apart, our pool of babysitters is really small at this stage, and I am just abundantly thankful that my in-laws were so willing to let us get away for a weekend together.
Good Morning! Nothing terrible this week, but nothing super great. Just kind of coasting along. I am exhausted though. I feel like I finally hit the wall after being on edge since March. In February my grandmother got very sick. It was unexpected but not. She had a genetic condition that caused the muscles in her throat to stop working, so she could no longer swallow. She passed away March 3. I feel fortunate that we were able to go home for the funeral because if it had been one week later, we would not have gone. It has been one long fraught, stressful edge since then and now that things have slowed at work I've had time to go slower and the exhaustion has just crept in. Or, I just have 10 minutes to recognize it.
In fun news - GBBS is back! Yay!
And my son continues to be a delight - https://www.instagram.com/p/CFX0x2BHFY8/