"You have very antiquated taste." "Thank you." I died.
Now that I have free time during the week, I get to do things like weekly-ish lunches with a friend. It's still warm enough to sit by the river, and we may bust out the kayaks the next time we go.
The local chain of movie theaters shows older movies on Sundays and Wednesdays and I FINALLY got to go for the first time this week. If you think I'm going to pass up watching Clue on the big screen, you've got another thing coming. Tim Curry at the height of his powers, I love it.
I got my final check in the mail this week, and my boss very generously paid out my PTO even though my contract says it's use it or lose it, so that will be a huge help.
I feel reasonably confident that Erin has shared a list of resources on Anglicanism here before, but I can't find it. Help?
Well, hello there! It's been a while since I posted because apparently my brain shuts down on Fridays nowadays? Because of that, I can't tell you about my week, like, what even happened? I don't know! But here are a few treasures from the top of my head/my 8467 open tabs.
šāāļøI got a haircut yesterday. Not just a trim but I actually changed the style up (a little) for the first time in years and I think I love it?
Iāve watched the first two episodes of season one, but thatās it. Life just suddenly got overwhelming and I couldnāt invest in a TV show all of a sudden. š but I think I will give this a try!
It's been a rough week over here, but we'll start with a treasure. Last weekend two friends and I finally got to meet up for a long-anticipated and overdue visit. We hadn't seen each other since spring of 2019, so it was incredible to be together again. We all met when we were volunteer English teachers in Malawi. We had a wonderful visit with lots of laughter which we sorely needed.
Good timing, too, because I came home to a very stressful week at work. There are mass layoffs happening completely unexpectedly.....it's being handled extremely poorly.... letting go the entire IT department in the middle of a statewide transition to Office 365...letting the HR manager go when open enrollment starts Monday... They are also moving people to different positions that don't make any sense. They moved me from managing logistics for all of our training programs, to assigning appeals cases. Anyways, it has been very stressful, maddening, and sad. I'm desperate to find a new job in case I'm next to be laid off. I have a second interview this afternoon, and I was selected for a final round of interviews next week with a different organization. Please send any Ts, Ps, good vibes, etc. my way if you think of it!
I hope everyone has the best weekend possible. I'm going to try to stay home and not go buy a bunch of plants--which is my coping mechanism these days....
It sounds like maybe whoever is in charge of these layoffs wants the company to fail??? Laying off the whole IT team??? The HR Manager during open enrollment season??? That is absurd!
I woke up with a headache and an irritated spirit this morning, and I am trying to shed it before starting school with my kiddos. Reflecting on treasures and reading yours helps a lot.
Treasures:
š²: I have been saving āfun moneyā for some time, and decided to use it to purchase an E-Bike. It arrived this week and has been a game changer for me. Stupid Walks have now turned into Stupid Bike Rides. I want to ride every day.
š¦: I signed up for Shannon K Evansās Rewilding Motherhood seminars, and last weeks on prayer was really good. Iām looking forward to the next one.
ā½ļø: Ted Lasso season finale. I laughed, I criedā¦it moved me, Bob.
My husband and I don't like that story line...what are they doing with him? It doesn't seem necessary or possible that he'd flip a switch like that unless he had an underlying mental illness š
Good morning! I've been happily reading all of your treasures and comments, but haven't had much time or energy to post a comment of my own over the last few months. I am coming off of months of back pain and spine surgery, and am finally feeling an ease in just the effort it takes to get through a normal day.
-I'm really valuing the dis/entangle study this week. Church and faith have been really hard for me since the fall of 2016, and this is the first time I have felt eager to return to study day after day. I still have a lot of questions about what faith looks like for me now, but this feels good for now.
- I am reading Dracula for my IRL book club and the confluence of reading it with spooky season memes about Dracula and vampires abounding on the socials is a true delight. I also heard someone talking about how they struggled with classics until they started writing snarky comments back to the author, and it has also been quite amusing to write stuff like, "THIS IS GARBAGE PATRIARCHY" and "Why would you say it like that, you weirdo" in the margins.
- In true youngest sister fashion, will never not suffer from wanting to do anything and everything to make sure my big sister loves me. So, I am truly embarrassed to tell you that when she texted me last night that her three year old threw one of his tractors out of the car window on a road near my house, I got in my car, drove down the street and searched for that little blue tractor. Y'all, I would NEVER have done that for my own children. (I did find it, though. I am embarrassed, but a little proud of myself for being the hero.)
Hope you all have a lovely weekend, filled with unexpected joys!
My book club read Dracula a few years ago and I liked it so much more than I thought I would! As an easily scared person, I was concerned about it, but it was just right for me.
OMG ALSO HOW MANY LIL SWIPES ARE GOING TO THE CHICAGO LIVE SHOW IN APRIL? WHAT IF WE RENTED A GIANT AIRBNB AND HAD A BIG LIL SWIPE SLEEPOVER HOW DOES THAT SOUND PLS LET ME KNOW THANK YOU
- We are going to dinner and a JJ Grey & Mofro concert tonight with some friends and I'm so excited!!!
- I've gotten back into my morning workout routines and it's truly giving me life. I've started the Dance Cardio classes on the Peloton app and they are so fun.
- I am so ahead of schedule on holiday stuff. I ordered almost all of my Christmas gifts yesterday and I feel really accomplished.
- I get to visit my parents tomorrow and have lunch with them. It's been a while since I've seen my parents without my husband, and I'm kind of looking forward to it being just the 3 of us again like old times.
- I started watchin Midnight Mass and holy guacamole I am really enjoying it.
- I can't remember if I said it last week, but Reservation Dogs on Hulu has been my favorite show in a while. Definitely give it a try if you are looking for something light.
Turds:
- I work at a small college and we have to call all the students who have F's at midterms to make sure they are aware of all the resources available to them to help them get their grades up. I HATE making phone calls, especially ones like these that can be awkward. We have 164 kids with at least one F in our department and it makes me so sad. Some of them are failing literally all of their classes. A lot of them are first generation college students and don't have a lot of support, so hopefully I will at least be able to help steer some of them in the right direction.
Well, in the words of Porky Pig, that's all folks! Can't wait to catch up in the comments!
The Dance Cardio workouts are so fun! And I used to be coordinated, but these are reminding me that the important phrase there is "used to"! I'm also struggling with students this semester - I have a lot of international students who were promised a lot of institutional support when they came here who just aren't getting it. It feels so unfair, and it's also placing a lot on the plates of faculty and staff here. So hard.
Lauren, I do a lot of academic advising at the college I'm at, so I really empathize with the discouraging part of having to give a lot of students bad news, while simultaneously wanting the best for them. You should totally treat yourself to something fun once you finish phone call and number 164. :)
Also, I keep hearing about reservation dogs! I need a new fun light-hearted show so maybe I should check this out!
When I used to teach high school, I would try to intermingle my "your kid has an F in my required class" emails/calls with calls/emails to parents whose kids were doing really well and/or were delightful people. Or sometimes I would email the kids themselves to say "you're great." It helped to balance out the difficult. Not sure if that's realistic or feasible in your situation, but just wanted to mention it. :)
For many years, my brother and sister and I would have dinner at my parents house on Thursday nights because all of our spouses happened to work late on the same night, and it was such a lovely tradition. Older kids and their activities, and then covid of course, have curtailed that for now, but Nuclear Family Nights were so nice.
Good luck with the phone calls! I hate phone calls as well but wow, how amazing is it that your school has decided to make sure that students know about resources available to them? That phone call might be all the support they need. Best of luck and I am so impressed by your holiday timeliness - I can't even think about Christmas yet!
I had the best week. My husband, daughter and granddaughter went to Texas to visit family so I had absolutely no responsibilities from Sunday through today. I ate all the food, chased all the food with all the ice cream, and read all the books. Itās been heaven.
Good morning all! It's TAX DEADLINE DAY thank goodness because I don't think I have anything left in the tank. I'll try to be brief here as there has been a lot happening.
First, my son has been sick again, with strep, again. Dr. recommended we see an ENT about getting tonsils out (at which point he had a complete come apart because he's already had four...or is it five...surgeries since he was three). We are going to wait and see so Ts and Ps that the situation resolves itself ASAP.
Then, my husband was notified someone at his work tested positive for Covid, and then two days later we got notification from school that someone in our son's class at school tested positive. All this would be stressful under normal circumstances but is now compounded by the surgery I have scheduled for the 20th.
I had pre-op appt yesterday and without word vomiting all the details I'll just say that it was horrible on about six different levels and made me more worried about this than I already was (this E6 has already thought of all the worst case scenarios, or so I thought). There are four things specific to my situation that "could complicate things". I would appreciate any prayers said on my behalf over the next week or so, both for my state of mind leading up to the surgery but also for things to go perfectly smoothly and there to not be any complications. And also for the battery of tests that were run yesterday to show nothing amiss and for the Covid test I have to take on Sunday to be negative (I am vaccinated AND had a breakthrough case but also am the poster child for the "rare side effect" or "unusual/unlikely" event so I would not dare to assume I'm in the clear on this).
I do have some treasures. The weather here has finally cooled off for real and it's currently only 54 degrees!! We are projected to have some 40s this weekend! Also, after a not great tax season, my boss has apologized several times and said we will be evaluating our clients when I'm back in the office and making some changes because this is not how he wants to operate and "life is too short" to spend it trying to keep people happy who are not going to be happy no matter what.
Alright, I'm off to drink some coffee and chase down some clients who STILL haven't sent back their e-file authorization forms.
Having never cared about tax deadline day in my life, knowing you and the utter struggle you have been in this year has made me REJOICE in this day! Congrats! You made it! ...now on to the next stressor. You will get through that, too!
My husband is an actuary and has been doing the exact same chasing down routine this whole week. It's been a rough one for him. I'll say a prayer you get some rest this weekend once this deadline is past!
Well, we had a very exciting week around here. I came out of therapy on Tuesday to a text from my husband that said, "So...cops just showed up and checked to see if I was ok. Apparently, someone called and said they smelled rotting flesh." š As you can imagine, I had many questions. We have no clue if someone is mad at us and so they called the cops, but we both agreed that it wasn't someone's best day in terms of trying to get someone in trouble since rotting flesh is a pretty distinct smell...that clearly isn't hanging around our house. And isn't this really a commentary on me since the cops were told that they should check on my husband? I mean, I know he doesn't leave the house a lot since he's an introvert who works from home...but...I didn't kill him and stash the body, neighbors. Come on.
That's the most exciting thing that happened this week. Although I did make some applesauce and apple butter, and today I plan to make brandied apple rings, which feels exciting, too. It's quite a range of exciting things over here.
(Remembering hearing about something that smells like rotting flesh - googling - corpse flower, which only blooms for like 2 days a year, so probably not that)
Okay, I HAVE SUCH A WEIRDLY SPECIFIC STORY RELATING TO THAT. So, I have a friend that was a paramedic for a few years and on a few specific occasions, she smelled rotting flesh (hoarding situations, mostly - someone had died and no one could get to them/heard from them for a few weeks so then 911 was called and she was first on the scene.) ANYWAY. Homegirl contracted Covid late last year - and now sometimes has the stench of rotting flesh enter her nostrils. She has smelled it when we're together and I don't know what rotting flesh smells like, but I assume it's awful, and I definitely have not experienced any terrible smells when we're together. Anyway, her doctor thinks it's a long side effect of Covid and that sometimes she smells dead bodies. How horrific. ANYWAY sorry your neighbors suck - I have so many questions and also, YES, how DO they know what rotting flesh smells like? So weird.
That is awful---I cannot imagine having that particular smell all the time. I have heard this is a side effect of long Covid, but that is particularly terrible. Your poor friend. But this is also very interesting and gives some ideas for how a person might have called the cops with a very specific stench to report. Although you'd think that if that was the case they would know that maybe it wasn't real? Whatever. Who knows.
Well, and also, even if it WAS a covid symptom, wouldn't they have like.... checked with someone else? Before calling the cops? Like, "hey, do you smell a dead body?" "what? no, that must just be you". End of conversation. I truly don't understand
It was very confusing. And slightly distressing? We both walked around the whole outside of the house (which is very small) and garage (also small) sniffing deeply, looking like weirdos. There was no follow up call, apparently, so I guess we're good?
Hi friends! It's been a minute since I popped into the comments. Life has been busybusybusy. Mostly good stuff but always a side order of overwhelm and chaos!
I've been over analyzing my life (per usual) after realizing that I'm edging ever closer to my thirtieth birthday. I started to work on the pre-work for dis/entagle and had a breakdown on the first few questions (How would you describe yourself? Whatās important for people to know about you and who you are? What makes you tick?) and realized that the majority of my life and experiences are built around taking care of everyone else. I don't make intentional space and time for myself. My only hobby is reading which is also my job. I am trying to work on that and have gotten a bit better but it still knocked me a bit sideways. I've decided to come up with a list of ten (ish) things I want to do for myself by my birthday in May. So far I've come up with: actually do a skin care routine regularly, establish a routine fo 20 minute timer reading each day, continually invest in my writing life and more specifically try to get something published, and have a savings account (separate from our joint accounts) with $1000.
A few treasures from this week:
-the new Adele song. like, put it in my veins. On repeat forever.
-Seeing my favorite musician of all time ever tonight and tomorrow night in a safe, smaller venue where everyone has to wear masks and be vaccinated/tested negative to get in.
-There was a mix up in the schedule for the preschool I work at and we ended up with too many subs today so I left and am now sitting in our local coffee shop actually taking time for myself. My almond milk, Irish cream latte is a dream.
-I'm having lunch with a friend later. She's one of my favorite people and we don't see each other nearly enough.
-I joined Taylor Schuman's Writing In the Cracks mentorship earlier this year on a whim and it's one of the best things I've ever done for myself. It's challenging and wonderful and I am so proud of myself.
Are you an enneagram 2? ;) I had the same breakdown with dis/entangle - I think my only answer that truly related to myself and only myself was that I love dessert. So. Here in the boat with you. I think that list is a great start and I hope whatever else you come up with for your birthday is amazing and restorative as well!
I did the Writing in the Cracks mentorship, and it also was a fun challenge. I'm glad you feel so proud of yourself! That's a wonderful way to feel. :) When I turned 30, I did "30 Ways to Celebrate Turning 30" and did something every day of the month. It was amazing and I loved every minute of it. I didn't have any complicated feelings about turning 30, so I may not be the best offerer of celebration advice, but I think creating a list of things to anticipate is a great idea. :)
Our gem was camping at Evangola State Park last weekend, & then spending the day at Niagara Falls. Our drive up took us through beautiful, beautiful fall leaves, but then the weather at the campground was warm enough the kids could swim in Lake Erie. I's been so life-giving to get away a few times this year. Also as the kids get older it's feeling more manageable. Hopefully we can keep it up in 2022.
In other news, we're continuing on with the house projects we started the weekend lockdown started, when the kids got home from school & I had moved all their belongings into the living room where they camped out for a month while we redid the floors in that part of the house. Now we're painting the exterior, which I've never actually done before, but is so satisfying!! :) I color-matched Farrow & Ball's Mahogany, & I am loving it!
Hope you have a good week, everyone ... on to the comments! :)
Good morning! That Mindy tweet had me cackling! I am really glad it's Friday this week. It's been a good week, but VERY full. And I have recently started a new professional project that really ramped up this week and I am a little on edge about it. I know I'll settle in soon, but right now it's got my nerves jumping. Anyway, we are supposed to get a cold front tonight, and when I tell you I am excited that is an UNDERSTATEMENT. I might go outside tomorrow morning and dance like a loon in the backyard.
And for shareable treasure: I read a book this week called Just Pru by Anne Pfeffer, and it was an unexpected delight. It was the kind of story that uses a light touch on heavy subjects. (Trigger warning for emotional abuse).
I've had a pretty good week all around, though I still feel like I'm recovering from how busy last weekend was! Does anyone else feel like their fall calendar has absolutely exploded?! It's mostly good stuff, but phew, I don't remember how to be this busy.
If you need to hack your crying, the latest 11-part series from Humans of New York should do it, and this post in particular (this is part 10, so if you don't like spoilers read all the rest first!):
Some people I care about have NOT had such great weeks, though. If you have concrete ideas for how to show up for your people, especially through mental health challenges, will you share those with me?
Mail preferred, thoughtful emails/DMs are also great. My best friend and I have been long distance for years and I cannot count the number of times a note from her has helped pull me out of the hole. This can be anything from a brief "thinking of you" to something longer about how much you love and appreciate them.
Forgot to mention - if you have somewhere local with cool/pretty/unique stationary (museum gift shop, art gallery, etc), then it's a bonus pretty thing for them.
I have several long distance friends, so it's often hard/impossible for us to show up for one another in person. A few concrete ideas that we have done: uber eats gift cards, thinking of you texts/phone calls/snail mail notes, grocery store (with hot food or salad bar options) gift cards, $5 venmo for coffee, house cleaning service, flower/plant delivery, care package with a book, or their favorite things, instacart gift card...I'll let you know if I think of any others.
I just discovered that you can order pick up and delivery laundry services for people. I just searched their town and laundry pick up and delivery and snag a gift card (or go in with a few people and get a bigger one). When the laundry starts piling up, everything feels out of control, so this is an easy way to alleviate that.
Ditto on the laundry service! I have done that recently as well and it was the perfect amount of "lifting some burden" they needed. See also: grocery delivery gift card, doordash/uber eats/grubhub gift card, or a gift card to like Disney+ or a streaming service they like if there's a show they have been wanting to watch but don't want to pay for it before it is free to stream.
What about committing to sending them mail every week? People love mail, and an encouraging card can make a huge difference in someone's day. Another option would be to write a bunch of cards for different struggles (ex. "When you're feeling sad", "When you're feeling alone", "When you're feeling unmotivated") and send a big package of cards that they can open in whatever moment they might need it.
My go-to recommendation for helping people in a non-food way is to clean their bathroom or their fridge. Don't just offer to do it, tell them it's happening and schedule the time. Knowing that there's a little bit less chaos in my actual house eases my psychic load, so to speak, and if I didn't have to work hard for it to happen, even better.
I deeply feel this last paragraph. I learned this week about a dear friend who is really struggling with mental health, and it's so hard to know what to do.
I really WANT to be supportive, but it seems like most advice on the internet is vague and often assumes you're able to physically visit or drop things off to the person, which isn't always the case.
We got our first snow of the season over here already and although it made the mountains look insanely beautiful (a thin layer of snow over the fall colors are you KIDDING ME), I donāt know that I am quite ready for the cold and the dark days and my cold car. But also, I felt like I was in a snow globe sitting in the store with our giant windows and watching the snow fall. It was so beautiful.
Some treasures:
šŖ I am having a āJust Dessertsā party tomorrow as a fundraiser for my friend - everyone is venmoing me $10/person and bringing dessert to eat. And people can win prizes that have kindly been donated! And some lil swipes have donated money even though they donāt live here š„ŗ Iāve got about $200 I am going to send to her so far. Itās a tiny dent in what sheās dealing with but I hope she uses it to buy herself something sheād really like.
šŖ We had the grand opening for the new Salt & Honey location and it was wonderful and emotional and also so many things went wrong that it was almost comical. Our wifi went out so our register had to connect to my hotspot, the card reader just completely broke, and we had to call security on a person outside who was yelling insane things at us. But so it goes! Weāre coming up on the 2 year anniversary of the day that I interviewed for Salt & Honey (which also happened to be the day I was in a car accident and also the same day that my parents told me they were selling their business and moving across the country) so it was tender for me to think about what has happened since then and how Salt & Honey has helped me grow through it.
some turds
š“š» Our mortgage company had an issue with our bank and they withdrew our mortgage three days early (and, subsequently, 3 days before I got paid). Talk about stressful when suddenly your account is negative because of a mistake!!
š“š» I accidentally shattered my phone screen this week and need to get it fixed asap. But I also just got it replaced less than a month ago. Such is life.
Canāt wait to hear about your week, folks. Going through dis/entangle over on the swipe up+ has been a gift and itās been hard but itās been lovely.
I'm glad you had such lovely weather on the week you were feeling tender. Hoping the party tomorrow will be a success in every possible way and that next week will treat you kindly.
Shelby your comments on dis/entangle have been so thoughtful and helpful to read! I saw on one of the national park accounts I follow this amazing picture of golden aspens with snow coming down; I forget exactly where it was from, but yes, also seems too early for full-on winter!
Thank you, Kathryn! Ooooh I don't know that I follow that account but it sounds beautiful - aspens are a plenty over here!! But yes my windshield was frozen this morning and I had to wait for it to defrost! I'm not ready!
"You have very antiquated taste." "Thank you." I died.
Now that I have free time during the week, I get to do things like weekly-ish lunches with a friend. It's still warm enough to sit by the river, and we may bust out the kayaks the next time we go.
The local chain of movie theaters shows older movies on Sundays and Wednesdays and I FINALLY got to go for the first time this week. If you think I'm going to pass up watching Clue on the big screen, you've got another thing coming. Tim Curry at the height of his powers, I love it.
I got my final check in the mail this week, and my boss very generously paid out my PTO even though my contract says it's use it or lose it, so that will be a huge help.
I feel reasonably confident that Erin has shared a list of resources on Anglicanism here before, but I can't find it. Help?
Well, hello there! It's been a while since I posted because apparently my brain shuts down on Fridays nowadays? Because of that, I can't tell you about my week, like, what even happened? I don't know! But here are a few treasures from the top of my head/my 8467 open tabs.
šāāļøI got a haircut yesterday. Not just a trim but I actually changed the style up (a little) for the first time in years and I think I love it?
š§¦ Dear Santa, for Christmas I would very much like these socks from the Modern Mrs Darcy gift guide, pleaseandthankyou. https://www.etsy.com/listing/677343322/book-socks-so-many-books-so-little-time?ref=shop_home_active_1&pro=1&source=aw&utm_source=affiliate_window&utm_medium=affiliate&utm_campaign=us_location_buyer&utm_content=136348&awc=6220_1634133021_44cf0ada4ce53b4bb440a8593576803b&utm_term=0
āŗ New favorite word: SMYSTER, smiling to yourself while daydreaming. (19th century Scots) I love it because I do this a lot! š
šŗ Ted Lasso. So good. And it made me want to move to Richmond, it seems so pretty!
š¶ I can't handle this baby running. https://twitter.com/tomfolanmd/status/1448817479606841345
š¤£ Mispronouncing food items. https://www.instagram.com/p/CUOKCeWrYzq/
I hope you'll all have a wonderful weekend!
Gahhhhhhh I need to watch Ted Lasso. Iām so behind!
Have you seen any of it? I'm so behind on TV in general that I get stressed trying to pick what to watch next. š¬
Iāve watched the first two episodes of season one, but thatās it. Life just suddenly got overwhelming and I couldnāt invest in a TV show all of a sudden. š but I think I will give this a try!
I get that, sometimes you just can't... If you are looking for something to watch though, Ted Lasso is a good, kind place to start. š
Update, I just watched the first four episodes and I am sold!
I hope you'll enjoy the rest as well! š
These tweets are life. I cannot explain why Timothee Chalamet looks like that shoe but he DOESš¤Æ
He really does!!!
It's been a rough week over here, but we'll start with a treasure. Last weekend two friends and I finally got to meet up for a long-anticipated and overdue visit. We hadn't seen each other since spring of 2019, so it was incredible to be together again. We all met when we were volunteer English teachers in Malawi. We had a wonderful visit with lots of laughter which we sorely needed.
Good timing, too, because I came home to a very stressful week at work. There are mass layoffs happening completely unexpectedly.....it's being handled extremely poorly.... letting go the entire IT department in the middle of a statewide transition to Office 365...letting the HR manager go when open enrollment starts Monday... They are also moving people to different positions that don't make any sense. They moved me from managing logistics for all of our training programs, to assigning appeals cases. Anyways, it has been very stressful, maddening, and sad. I'm desperate to find a new job in case I'm next to be laid off. I have a second interview this afternoon, and I was selected for a final round of interviews next week with a different organization. Please send any Ts, Ps, good vibes, etc. my way if you think of it!
I hope everyone has the best weekend possible. I'm going to try to stay home and not go buy a bunch of plants--which is my coping mechanism these days....
It sounds like maybe whoever is in charge of these layoffs wants the company to fail??? Laying off the whole IT team??? The HR Manager during open enrollment season??? That is absurd!
There are worse coping mechanisms... ;) Praying for your interviews!
I woke up with a headache and an irritated spirit this morning, and I am trying to shed it before starting school with my kiddos. Reflecting on treasures and reading yours helps a lot.
Treasures:
š²: I have been saving āfun moneyā for some time, and decided to use it to purchase an E-Bike. It arrived this week and has been a game changer for me. Stupid Walks have now turned into Stupid Bike Rides. I want to ride every day.
š¦: I signed up for Shannon K Evansās Rewilding Motherhood seminars, and last weeks on prayer was really good. Iām looking forward to the next one.
ā½ļø: Ted Lasso season finale. I laughed, I criedā¦it moved me, Bob.
š©: I finished a really cute cozy mystery called Survival of the Fritters. The main character owns a donut shop, and now I want to make donuts. Anyone have a good, easy recipe?
May your weekend be filled with cool weather and little treasures. Thanks for being some of the kindest people on the interwebs. ā¤ļø
This is my favorite recipe for donuts! https://www.melskitchencafe.com/the-best-homemade-glazed-donuts/
Ted Lasso was so good and I'm just so shocked by Nate's behavior!
My husband and I don't like that story line...what are they doing with him? It doesn't seem necessary or possible that he'd flip a switch like that unless he had an underlying mental illness š
Good morning! I've been happily reading all of your treasures and comments, but haven't had much time or energy to post a comment of my own over the last few months. I am coming off of months of back pain and spine surgery, and am finally feeling an ease in just the effort it takes to get through a normal day.
-I'm really valuing the dis/entangle study this week. Church and faith have been really hard for me since the fall of 2016, and this is the first time I have felt eager to return to study day after day. I still have a lot of questions about what faith looks like for me now, but this feels good for now.
- I am reading Dracula for my IRL book club and the confluence of reading it with spooky season memes about Dracula and vampires abounding on the socials is a true delight. I also heard someone talking about how they struggled with classics until they started writing snarky comments back to the author, and it has also been quite amusing to write stuff like, "THIS IS GARBAGE PATRIARCHY" and "Why would you say it like that, you weirdo" in the margins.
- In true youngest sister fashion, will never not suffer from wanting to do anything and everything to make sure my big sister loves me. So, I am truly embarrassed to tell you that when she texted me last night that her three year old threw one of his tractors out of the car window on a road near my house, I got in my car, drove down the street and searched for that little blue tractor. Y'all, I would NEVER have done that for my own children. (I did find it, though. I am embarrassed, but a little proud of myself for being the hero.)
Hope you all have a lovely weekend, filled with unexpected joys!
Talking back to authors is such a great idea! Also, I would 100% go find my nephewās or nieceās toy.
I LOVE the idea of talking back to authors in the margins. Will be stealing post-haste
My book club read Dracula a few years ago and I liked it so much more than I thought I would! As an easily scared person, I was concerned about it, but it was just right for me.
OMG ALSO HOW MANY LIL SWIPES ARE GOING TO THE CHICAGO LIVE SHOW IN APRIL? WHAT IF WE RENTED A GIANT AIRBNB AND HAD A BIG LIL SWIPE SLEEPOVER HOW DOES THAT SOUND PLS LET ME KNOW THANK YOU
Anyone is welcome to stay with me!!
I'M IN
I won't be there, but love this energy!!
I am going to be there and I am SO IN FOR ALL OF THIS!!!
YES IT WILL BE SO FUN
oooh post show drinks?!
YES YES YES YES YES
Why, why do I live on the wrong continent????
WHY MUST THE WORLD BE SO BIG
Good morning sweet friends!
Let's get right into Treasures:
- We are going to dinner and a JJ Grey & Mofro concert tonight with some friends and I'm so excited!!!
- I've gotten back into my morning workout routines and it's truly giving me life. I've started the Dance Cardio classes on the Peloton app and they are so fun.
- I am so ahead of schedule on holiday stuff. I ordered almost all of my Christmas gifts yesterday and I feel really accomplished.
- I get to visit my parents tomorrow and have lunch with them. It's been a while since I've seen my parents without my husband, and I'm kind of looking forward to it being just the 3 of us again like old times.
- I started watchin Midnight Mass and holy guacamole I am really enjoying it.
- I can't remember if I said it last week, but Reservation Dogs on Hulu has been my favorite show in a while. Definitely give it a try if you are looking for something light.
Turds:
- I work at a small college and we have to call all the students who have F's at midterms to make sure they are aware of all the resources available to them to help them get their grades up. I HATE making phone calls, especially ones like these that can be awkward. We have 164 kids with at least one F in our department and it makes me so sad. Some of them are failing literally all of their classes. A lot of them are first generation college students and don't have a lot of support, so hopefully I will at least be able to help steer some of them in the right direction.
Well, in the words of Porky Pig, that's all folks! Can't wait to catch up in the comments!
The Dance Cardio workouts are so fun! And I used to be coordinated, but these are reminding me that the important phrase there is "used to"! I'm also struggling with students this semester - I have a lot of international students who were promised a lot of institutional support when they came here who just aren't getting it. It feels so unfair, and it's also placing a lot on the plates of faculty and staff here. So hard.
Lauren, I do a lot of academic advising at the college I'm at, so I really empathize with the discouraging part of having to give a lot of students bad news, while simultaneously wanting the best for them. You should totally treat yourself to something fun once you finish phone call and number 164. :)
Also, I keep hearing about reservation dogs! I need a new fun light-hearted show so maybe I should check this out!
When I used to teach high school, I would try to intermingle my "your kid has an F in my required class" emails/calls with calls/emails to parents whose kids were doing really well and/or were delightful people. Or sometimes I would email the kids themselves to say "you're great." It helped to balance out the difficult. Not sure if that's realistic or feasible in your situation, but just wanted to mention it. :)
For many years, my brother and sister and I would have dinner at my parents house on Thursday nights because all of our spouses happened to work late on the same night, and it was such a lovely tradition. Older kids and their activities, and then covid of course, have curtailed that for now, but Nuclear Family Nights were so nice.
Good luck with the phone calls! I hate phone calls as well but wow, how amazing is it that your school has decided to make sure that students know about resources available to them? That phone call might be all the support they need. Best of luck and I am so impressed by your holiday timeliness - I can't even think about Christmas yet!
I had the best week. My husband, daughter and granddaughter went to Texas to visit family so I had absolutely no responsibilities from Sunday through today. I ate all the food, chased all the food with all the ice cream, and read all the books. Itās been heaven.
AMAZING. š What was your favorite ice cream that you had? š
I don't discriminate against any ice cream. I prefer a vanilla base with caramel and chocolate mixed in, but I will eat whatever you've got!
That sounds amazing!
Good morning all! It's TAX DEADLINE DAY thank goodness because I don't think I have anything left in the tank. I'll try to be brief here as there has been a lot happening.
First, my son has been sick again, with strep, again. Dr. recommended we see an ENT about getting tonsils out (at which point he had a complete come apart because he's already had four...or is it five...surgeries since he was three). We are going to wait and see so Ts and Ps that the situation resolves itself ASAP.
Then, my husband was notified someone at his work tested positive for Covid, and then two days later we got notification from school that someone in our son's class at school tested positive. All this would be stressful under normal circumstances but is now compounded by the surgery I have scheduled for the 20th.
I had pre-op appt yesterday and without word vomiting all the details I'll just say that it was horrible on about six different levels and made me more worried about this than I already was (this E6 has already thought of all the worst case scenarios, or so I thought). There are four things specific to my situation that "could complicate things". I would appreciate any prayers said on my behalf over the next week or so, both for my state of mind leading up to the surgery but also for things to go perfectly smoothly and there to not be any complications. And also for the battery of tests that were run yesterday to show nothing amiss and for the Covid test I have to take on Sunday to be negative (I am vaccinated AND had a breakthrough case but also am the poster child for the "rare side effect" or "unusual/unlikely" event so I would not dare to assume I'm in the clear on this).
I do have some treasures. The weather here has finally cooled off for real and it's currently only 54 degrees!! We are projected to have some 40s this weekend! Also, after a not great tax season, my boss has apologized several times and said we will be evaluating our clients when I'm back in the office and making some changes because this is not how he wants to operate and "life is too short" to spend it trying to keep people happy who are not going to be happy no matter what.
Alright, I'm off to drink some coffee and chase down some clients who STILL haven't sent back their e-file authorization forms.
You're in my prayers. ā¤
Having never cared about tax deadline day in my life, knowing you and the utter struggle you have been in this year has made me REJOICE in this day! Congrats! You made it! ...now on to the next stressor. You will get through that, too!
Praying for your family and peace during your surgery!!! <3
My husband is an actuary and has been doing the exact same chasing down routine this whole week. It's been a rough one for him. I'll say a prayer you get some rest this weekend once this deadline is past!
Well, we had a very exciting week around here. I came out of therapy on Tuesday to a text from my husband that said, "So...cops just showed up and checked to see if I was ok. Apparently, someone called and said they smelled rotting flesh." š As you can imagine, I had many questions. We have no clue if someone is mad at us and so they called the cops, but we both agreed that it wasn't someone's best day in terms of trying to get someone in trouble since rotting flesh is a pretty distinct smell...that clearly isn't hanging around our house. And isn't this really a commentary on me since the cops were told that they should check on my husband? I mean, I know he doesn't leave the house a lot since he's an introvert who works from home...but...I didn't kill him and stash the body, neighbors. Come on.
That's the most exciting thing that happened this week. Although I did make some applesauce and apple butter, and today I plan to make brandied apple rings, which feels exciting, too. It's quite a range of exciting things over here.
Hope everyone has a good weekend!
Whaaaat? So very strange!
(Remembering hearing about something that smells like rotting flesh - googling - corpse flower, which only blooms for like 2 days a year, so probably not that)
I appreciate your attempts to help it make sense. We have gone through a variety of āMaybe itās thisā¦ā to try to make sense of it!
Truly, what a wild time!
Absolutely wild. Please let us know if anything else happens in this story.
I will for sure!
Wait what? This sounds like the plot from a TV show!
Right?!
This was such a wild journey!
Okay, I HAVE SUCH A WEIRDLY SPECIFIC STORY RELATING TO THAT. So, I have a friend that was a paramedic for a few years and on a few specific occasions, she smelled rotting flesh (hoarding situations, mostly - someone had died and no one could get to them/heard from them for a few weeks so then 911 was called and she was first on the scene.) ANYWAY. Homegirl contracted Covid late last year - and now sometimes has the stench of rotting flesh enter her nostrils. She has smelled it when we're together and I don't know what rotting flesh smells like, but I assume it's awful, and I definitely have not experienced any terrible smells when we're together. Anyway, her doctor thinks it's a long side effect of Covid and that sometimes she smells dead bodies. How horrific. ANYWAY sorry your neighbors suck - I have so many questions and also, YES, how DO they know what rotting flesh smells like? So weird.
That is awful---I cannot imagine having that particular smell all the time. I have heard this is a side effect of long Covid, but that is particularly terrible. Your poor friend. But this is also very interesting and gives some ideas for how a person might have called the cops with a very specific stench to report. Although you'd think that if that was the case they would know that maybe it wasn't real? Whatever. Who knows.
Well, and also, even if it WAS a covid symptom, wouldn't they have like.... checked with someone else? Before calling the cops? Like, "hey, do you smell a dead body?" "what? no, that must just be you". End of conversation. I truly don't understand
Haha! EXACTLY.
Your poor friend!
I know, right?! My husband will sometimes just randomly smell burnt coffee, but never anything worst than that.
I read this article last month, and I cannot stop thinking about it. https://www.thecut.com/2021/09/covid-19-parosmia-sense-smell.html
So, my question is, how does the caller know what ārotting fleshā smells like? That seems v specific.
That's what my bff said, too! "The cops should probably be talking to the person who knows what rotting flesh smells like."
GIRL AMEN.
Karen, I have so many questions and I don't even know where to begin! What in the world?!
It was very confusing. And slightly distressing? We both walked around the whole outside of the house (which is very small) and garage (also small) sniffing deeply, looking like weirdos. There was no follow up call, apparently, so I guess we're good?
Hi friends! It's been a minute since I popped into the comments. Life has been busybusybusy. Mostly good stuff but always a side order of overwhelm and chaos!
I've been over analyzing my life (per usual) after realizing that I'm edging ever closer to my thirtieth birthday. I started to work on the pre-work for dis/entagle and had a breakdown on the first few questions (How would you describe yourself? Whatās important for people to know about you and who you are? What makes you tick?) and realized that the majority of my life and experiences are built around taking care of everyone else. I don't make intentional space and time for myself. My only hobby is reading which is also my job. I am trying to work on that and have gotten a bit better but it still knocked me a bit sideways. I've decided to come up with a list of ten (ish) things I want to do for myself by my birthday in May. So far I've come up with: actually do a skin care routine regularly, establish a routine fo 20 minute timer reading each day, continually invest in my writing life and more specifically try to get something published, and have a savings account (separate from our joint accounts) with $1000.
A few treasures from this week:
-the new Adele song. like, put it in my veins. On repeat forever.
-Seeing my favorite musician of all time ever tonight and tomorrow night in a safe, smaller venue where everyone has to wear masks and be vaccinated/tested negative to get in.
-There was a mix up in the schedule for the preschool I work at and we ended up with too many subs today so I left and am now sitting in our local coffee shop actually taking time for myself. My almond milk, Irish cream latte is a dream.
-I'm having lunch with a friend later. She's one of my favorite people and we don't see each other nearly enough.
-I joined Taylor Schuman's Writing In the Cracks mentorship earlier this year on a whim and it's one of the best things I've ever done for myself. It's challenging and wonderful and I am so proud of myself.
Are you an enneagram 2? ;) I had the same breakdown with dis/entangle - I think my only answer that truly related to myself and only myself was that I love dessert. So. Here in the boat with you. I think that list is a great start and I hope whatever else you come up with for your birthday is amazing and restorative as well!
I did the Writing in the Cracks mentorship, and it also was a fun challenge. I'm glad you feel so proud of yourself! That's a wonderful way to feel. :) When I turned 30, I did "30 Ways to Celebrate Turning 30" and did something every day of the month. It was amazing and I loved every minute of it. I didn't have any complicated feelings about turning 30, so I may not be the best offerer of celebration advice, but I think creating a list of things to anticipate is a great idea. :)
"Little poopster," what a gem!!
So glad you got & loved apple cider donuts!
Our gem was camping at Evangola State Park last weekend, & then spending the day at Niagara Falls. Our drive up took us through beautiful, beautiful fall leaves, but then the weather at the campground was warm enough the kids could swim in Lake Erie. I's been so life-giving to get away a few times this year. Also as the kids get older it's feeling more manageable. Hopefully we can keep it up in 2022.
In other news, we're continuing on with the house projects we started the weekend lockdown started, when the kids got home from school & I had moved all their belongings into the living room where they camped out for a month while we redid the floors in that part of the house. Now we're painting the exterior, which I've never actually done before, but is so satisfying!! :) I color-matched Farrow & Ball's Mahogany, & I am loving it!
Hope you have a good week, everyone ... on to the comments! :)
Good morning! That Mindy tweet had me cackling! I am really glad it's Friday this week. It's been a good week, but VERY full. And I have recently started a new professional project that really ramped up this week and I am a little on edge about it. I know I'll settle in soon, but right now it's got my nerves jumping. Anyway, we are supposed to get a cold front tonight, and when I tell you I am excited that is an UNDERSTATEMENT. I might go outside tomorrow morning and dance like a loon in the backyard.
And for shareable treasure: I read a book this week called Just Pru by Anne Pfeffer, and it was an unexpected delight. It was the kind of story that uses a light touch on heavy subjects. (Trigger warning for emotional abuse).
I hope everyone has the weekend you need. š
wait will you send that cold front over here?! praying for that project, friend!
Will do my best to share the cold front love. š
I know it's not a big deal by FL/TX standards, but it is 82 degrees here today, and I am incandescent with rage about it. No thank you.
I feel ya, girl
I've had a pretty good week all around, though I still feel like I'm recovering from how busy last weekend was! Does anyone else feel like their fall calendar has absolutely exploded?! It's mostly good stuff, but phew, I don't remember how to be this busy.
If you need to hack your crying, the latest 11-part series from Humans of New York should do it, and this post in particular (this is part 10, so if you don't like spoilers read all the rest first!):
https://www.facebook.com/humansofnewyork/posts/6699046530169390
Some people I care about have NOT had such great weeks, though. If you have concrete ideas for how to show up for your people, especially through mental health challenges, will you share those with me?
Mail preferred, thoughtful emails/DMs are also great. My best friend and I have been long distance for years and I cannot count the number of times a note from her has helped pull me out of the hole. This can be anything from a brief "thinking of you" to something longer about how much you love and appreciate them.
Forgot to mention - if you have somewhere local with cool/pretty/unique stationary (museum gift shop, art gallery, etc), then it's a bonus pretty thing for them.
I have several long distance friends, so it's often hard/impossible for us to show up for one another in person. A few concrete ideas that we have done: uber eats gift cards, thinking of you texts/phone calls/snail mail notes, grocery store (with hot food or salad bar options) gift cards, $5 venmo for coffee, house cleaning service, flower/plant delivery, care package with a book, or their favorite things, instacart gift card...I'll let you know if I think of any others.
I just discovered that you can order pick up and delivery laundry services for people. I just searched their town and laundry pick up and delivery and snag a gift card (or go in with a few people and get a bigger one). When the laundry starts piling up, everything feels out of control, so this is an easy way to alleviate that.
Ditto on the laundry service! I have done that recently as well and it was the perfect amount of "lifting some burden" they needed. See also: grocery delivery gift card, doordash/uber eats/grubhub gift card, or a gift card to like Disney+ or a streaming service they like if there's a show they have been wanting to watch but don't want to pay for it before it is free to stream.
I always appreciate a "thinking of you, you are loved, no need to respond" text/video message out of the blue when I am down.
What about committing to sending them mail every week? People love mail, and an encouraging card can make a huge difference in someone's day. Another option would be to write a bunch of cards for different struggles (ex. "When you're feeling sad", "When you're feeling alone", "When you're feeling unmotivated") and send a big package of cards that they can open in whatever moment they might need it.
Ooh, I like the idea of notes for different times.
My go-to recommendation for helping people in a non-food way is to clean their bathroom or their fridge. Don't just offer to do it, tell them it's happening and schedule the time. Knowing that there's a little bit less chaos in my actual house eases my psychic load, so to speak, and if I didn't have to work hard for it to happen, even better.
I deeply feel this last paragraph. I learned this week about a dear friend who is really struggling with mental health, and it's so hard to know what to do.
I really WANT to be supportive, but it seems like most advice on the internet is vague and often assumes you're able to physically visit or drop things off to the person, which isn't always the case.
Happy Friday!
We got our first snow of the season over here already and although it made the mountains look insanely beautiful (a thin layer of snow over the fall colors are you KIDDING ME), I donāt know that I am quite ready for the cold and the dark days and my cold car. But also, I felt like I was in a snow globe sitting in the store with our giant windows and watching the snow fall. It was so beautiful.
Some treasures:
šŖ I am having a āJust Dessertsā party tomorrow as a fundraiser for my friend - everyone is venmoing me $10/person and bringing dessert to eat. And people can win prizes that have kindly been donated! And some lil swipes have donated money even though they donāt live here š„ŗ Iāve got about $200 I am going to send to her so far. Itās a tiny dent in what sheās dealing with but I hope she uses it to buy herself something sheād really like.
šŖ We had the grand opening for the new Salt & Honey location and it was wonderful and emotional and also so many things went wrong that it was almost comical. Our wifi went out so our register had to connect to my hotspot, the card reader just completely broke, and we had to call security on a person outside who was yelling insane things at us. But so it goes! Weāre coming up on the 2 year anniversary of the day that I interviewed for Salt & Honey (which also happened to be the day I was in a car accident and also the same day that my parents told me they were selling their business and moving across the country) so it was tender for me to think about what has happened since then and how Salt & Honey has helped me grow through it.
some turds
š“š» Our mortgage company had an issue with our bank and they withdrew our mortgage three days early (and, subsequently, 3 days before I got paid). Talk about stressful when suddenly your account is negative because of a mistake!!
š“š» I accidentally shattered my phone screen this week and need to get it fixed asap. But I also just got it replaced less than a month ago. Such is life.
Canāt wait to hear about your week, folks. Going through dis/entangle over on the swipe up+ has been a gift and itās been hard but itās been lovely.
Ah, I am so jealous of your snow! I hope the party is wonderful and that you find time for yourself this weekend :)
I'm glad you had such lovely weather on the week you were feeling tender. Hoping the party tomorrow will be a success in every possible way and that next week will treat you kindly.
All the hugs to you as you work with some tender feelings this week!
thank you, jackie ā¤
what a week, S! so happy to celebrate and commiserate with ya
ā¤
Shelby your comments on dis/entangle have been so thoughtful and helpful to read! I saw on one of the national park accounts I follow this amazing picture of golden aspens with snow coming down; I forget exactly where it was from, but yes, also seems too early for full-on winter!
Thank you, Kathryn! Ooooh I don't know that I follow that account but it sounds beautiful - aspens are a plenty over here!! But yes my windshield was frozen this morning and I had to wait for it to defrost! I'm not ready!
Whew! What a week!
What a week indeed!